Links |
Join |
Forums |
Find Help |
Recovery Readings |
Spiritual Meditations |
Chat |
Contact |
|
|
Humor "We Are Not A Glum Lot." Share Articles, Humor, Inspirations, Jokes, News, Poems, Quotes, Writings, etc. Here. Keep It Clean Please. |
|
Thread Tools | Display Modes |
12-24-2019, 08:08 AM | #1 |
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 73,837
|
Christmas One Liners
Christmas One Liners
/* Merry Christmas! */ Q. What do you get if you cross mistletoe and a duck? A. A Christmas Quacker. Q. What do you call Santa when he stops moving? A. Santa Pause! Q. Where does a snowman keep his money? A. In a snow bank. Q. Why do mummies like Christmas so much? A. Because of all the wrapping! Q. What's white and red and goes up and down and up and down? A. Santa Claus in an elevator! Q. How do you scare a snowman? A. You get a hairdryer! Q. What do they sing under the ocean during the winter? A. Christmas Corals! Q. How much did Santa pay for his sleigh? A. Nothing, it was on the house! Q. What is invisible and smells like milk and cookies? A. Santa's burps! Q. What do snowmen do on Christmas? A. Play with the snow angels. Q. Who says "Oh, Oh, Oh!"? A. Santa walking backwards! Q. What nationality is Santa Claus? A. North Polish. Q. What do you call a Santa that sleeps all the time? A. Santa snores! Q. Why was Santa's helper depressed? A. He had low ELF-esteem. Q. What's a good holiday tip? A. Never catch snowflakes with your tongue until all the birds have gone south for the winter. Q. What Christmas carol is a favorite of parents? A. Silent Night. Q. What do you call a snowman in the summer? A. A puddle! Q. What do snowmen eat for breakfast? A. Frosted Flakes. Q. Why does Santa have three gardens ? A. So he can go HOE HOE HOE. Q. What does Santa clean his sleigh with? A. Comet. Q. What do you get when you deep fry Santa Claus? A. Crisp Kringle. Q. What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire? A. Frostbite.
__________________
"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K. When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time! God says that each of us is worth loving. |
The Following User Says Thank You to bluidkiti For Sharing: |
Sponsored Links |
Bookmarks |
Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests) | |
|
|
Similar Threads | ||||
Thread | Thread Starter | Forum | Replies | Last Post |
All I Want For Christmas Is You | bluidkiti | Videos and Music | 0 | 12-21-2019 07:41 PM |
Christmas Wonder | bluidkiti | Daily Spiritual Meditations | 0 | 12-22-2018 09:28 AM |
Christmas Wonder | bluidkiti | Daily Spiritual Meditations | 0 | 12-22-2017 08:49 AM |
If you look for Me at Christmas | bluidkiti | Daily Spiritual Meditations | 0 | 12-24-2016 08:23 AM |
Christmas Wonder | bluidkiti | Daily Spiritual Meditations | 0 | 12-22-2016 08:56 AM |