Links

Join

Forums

Find Help

Recovery Readings

Spiritual Meditations

Chat

Contact


Go Back   Bluidkiti's Alcohol and Drug Addictions Recovery Help/Support Forums > Lounge > Humor
Register FAQ Community Calendar Arcade Today's Posts Search Chat Room

Share This Forum!  
 
        

Humor "We Are Not A Glum Lot." Share Articles, Humor, Inspirations, Jokes, News, Poems, Quotes, Writings, etc. Here. Keep It Clean Please.

 
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Prev Previous Post   Next Post Next
Old 12-24-2021, 08:04 AM   #1
bluidkiti
Administrator
 
bluidkiti's Avatar
 

Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 73,726
Default Christmas One Liners

Christmas One Liners

/* Merry Christmas! */

Q. What do you get if you cross mistletoe and a duck?
A. A Christmas Quacker.

Q. What do you call Santa when he stops moving?
A. Santa Pause!

Q. Where does a snowman keep his money?
A. In a snow bank.

Q. Why do mummies like Christmas so much?
A. Because of all the wrapping!

Q. What's white and red and goes up and down and up and
down?
A. Santa Claus in an elevator!

Q. How do you scare a snowman?
A. You get a hairdryer!

Q. What do they sing under the ocean during the winter?
A. Christmas Corals!

Q. How much did Santa pay for his sleigh?
A. Nothing, it was on the house!

Q. What is invisible and smells like milk and cookies?
A. Santa's burps!

Q. What do snowmen do on Christmas?
A. Play with the snow angels.

Q. Who says "Oh, Oh, Oh!"?
A. Santa walking backwards!

Q. What nationality is Santa Claus?
A. North Polish.

Q. What do you call a Santa that sleeps all the time?
A. Santa snores!

Q. Why was Santa's helper depressed?
A. He had low ELF-esteem.

Q. What's a good holiday tip?
A. Never catch snowflakes with your tongue until all the
birds have gone south for the winter.

Q. What Christmas carol is a favorite of parents?
A. Silent Night.

Q. What do you call a snowman in the summer?
A. A puddle!

Q. What do snowmen eat for breakfast?
A. Frosted Flakes.

Q. Why does Santa have three gardens ?
A. So he can go HOE HOE HOE.

Q. What does Santa clean his sleigh with?
A. Comet.

Q. What do you get when you deep fry Santa Claus?
A. Crisp Kringle.

Q. What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?
A. Frostbite.
__________________
"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K.
When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt
We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time!
God says that each of us is worth loving.
bluidkiti is offline   Reply With Quote
Sponsored Links
Post New ThreadReply  

Bookmarks


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Christmas One Liners bluidkiti Humor 0 12-24-2019 08:08 AM
All I Want For Christmas Is You bluidkiti Videos and Music 0 12-21-2019 07:41 PM
If you look for Me at Christmas bluidkiti Daily Spiritual Meditations 0 12-24-2016 08:23 AM
Christmas Wonder bluidkiti Daily Spiritual Meditations 0 12-22-2016 08:56 AM
The Best Christmas bluidkiti Daily Spiritual Meditations 0 12-23-2015 10:38 AM


Click here to make a Donation

All times are GMT -4. The time now is 12:30 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.11
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions Inc.