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09-20-2014, 08:20 AM | #3 |
Newest Member
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: Columbus OH
Posts: 2
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Thanks Jo, for your concern. I know too well about the passage of time. I'm fairly certain that my tomorrow's are fewer in number than my yesterday's and get even less with each 'one day at a time'. Sometimes a slogan or cliche though just doesn't fix my problems no matter how well intentioned. My sorrows are perhaps not as great as those of, oh maybe those parents whose sons were beheaded by terrorists overseas but I doubt that they are of the opinion that they can just 'choose to have a better day' anytime they want to. Maybe their prayers, if they pray, bring them solace but mine do not. Sometimes a life can stay dark for more than just twenty four hours at a time.
I feel as though I made it to the top of the mountain, some time back but once I had reached that pinnacle, what then? Enjoy the view? I did that but eventually, after you climb as high as is possible and if you keep moving forward, you begin to descend that great height that you once struggled to climb. I'm as powerless over most things as anyone else but I've been climbing the hill longer than many and in so doing, I'm tired. I don't have the strength that I once did, nor the fire within to climb on and on forever. Every journey has a beginning but every journey also has an ending as well. I wish mine were over. Maybe it is at that. Life starts out as simple but the longer it goes on, the less simple it stays. Some mountains I've encountered have taken more than just twelve small steps to surmount. And on the journey down, on the way to the next hill to climb, I sometimes find myself caught between a rock and a hard place. This is one of those times and it will pass, I know that. A kidney stone usually passes too but that doesn't make the experience a pleasant one. I don't know that I was or am looking for solutions to anything. I mainly was looking to be noticed. You were the first and as of this writing the only one to acknowledge that I was noticed and for that I am grateful. But maybe this place isn't the right one for me. I'm going to start my day over now. May yours be as pleasant as I wish mine to be. Adieu |
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