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August 13
Daily Reflections A CLEAN SWEEP . . . . and third, having thus cleaned away the debris of the past, we consider how, with our newfound knowledge of ourselves, we may develop the best possible relations with every human being we know. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS , p. 77 As I face the Eighth Step, everything that was required for successful completion of the previous seven Steps came together: courage, honesty, sincerity, willingness and thoroughness. I could not muster the strength required for this task at the beginning, which is why this Step reads "Became willing. . . . " I needed to develop the courage to begin, the honesty to see where I was wrong, a sincere desire to set things right, thoroughness in making a list, and willingness to take the risk required for true humility. With the help of my Higher Power in developing these virtues, I completed this Step and continued to move forward in my quest for spiritual growth. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day "We had but two alternatives; one was to go on to the bitter end, blotting out the consciousness of our intolerable situation as best we could, and the other was to accept spiritual help. We became willing to maintain a certain simple attitude toward life. What seemed at first a flimsy reed has proved to be the loving and powerful hand of God. A new life has been given us, a design for living that really works. All of us establish in our own individual way our personal relationship with God." Have I established my own relationship with God? Meditation For The Day Make it a daily practice to review your character. Take your character in relation to your daily life, to your dear ones, your friends, your acquaintances, and your work. Each day try to see where God wants you to change. Plan how best each fault can be eradicated or each mistake be corrected. Never be satisfied with a comparison with those around you. Strive toward a better life as your ultimate goal. God is your helper through weakness to power, through danger to security, through fear and worry to peace and serenity. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may make real progress toward a better life. I pray that I may never be satisfied with my present state. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It The Answer in the Mirror, p. 225 While drinking, we were certain that our intelligence, backed by will power, could rightly control our inner lives and guarantee us success in the world around us. This brave philosophy, wherein each man played God, sounded good in the speaking, but it still had to meet the acid test: How well did it actually work? One good look in the mirror was answer enough. ******************************** My spiritual awakening was electrically sudden and absolutely convincing. At once I became a part--if only a tiny part--of a cosmos that was ruled by justice and love in the person of God. No matter what had been the consequences of my own willfulness and ignorance, or those of my fellow travelers on earth, this was still the truth. Such was the new and positive assurance, and this has never left me. 1. 12 & 12, p. 37 2. Grapevine, January 1962 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Blaming others Common sense Action NO matter what happens, some people insist that a culprit must be found when things go awry. Someone must be blamed for every wrong or catastrophe. We must be careful not to buy into this practice in three ways: FIRST, we must avoid being help responsible for problems we didn't cause. SECOND, we must also avoid any personal guilt for such problems. THIRD, we must not fall into the trap of unfairly blaming other people. The best use of energy we spend hunting down culprits is to fix what's within our powers, to have the courage to change the things (we) can. Then we will have done what we can to reduce the number of problems in the world while putting our own talents and energies to their best uses. I'll keep some balance today if I hear anybody blaming others for the world's woes. We'll probably fix most problems one day at a time, and I'll do the best I can with those problems I know something about. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Once it[a spoken word] flies out, you can't catch it. ---Russian proverb We've said many mean words. Our words often hurt the people we love. We can never really take back the words. But we're learning now to speak with care . We know the words have a lot of power. What do we say when we're angry? When we want something? When we're trying to be kind? Now, think about this: people will remember out words. If we're honest and careful in our speech, people will respect us. But if we say things to force our will, we may be sorry later. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, speak through me today. Action for the Day: Today, I'll ask one question of the person I love the most: "How have my words hurt you in the past?" Then I'll talk with my sponsor about this. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Anything forced into manifestation through personal will is always "ill got" and has "ever bad success." --Florence Scovel Shinn The main thrust of our recovery is to attune ourselves to God's will, struggling no longer to impose our own. The pain we've endured in past years was often of our own making. We controlled situations until we managed to force the outcome we desired, only to realize it didn't offer happiness. It was, instead, a bitter ending to the struggle. When we want something or someone to play by our rules, we can expect barriers. And when the barriers don't give way with a gentle push, we should consider it a clue that we are off course. When we want what God wants for us, the barriers, if any, will fall away. What God wants for us at every moment is growth and happiness. When we step away from our ego and develop a selfless posture toward life, we'll find serenity in the midst of any turmoil. Serenity is God's promise. When we get in line with God's will, we'll find peace. I will know God's will if I will listen to my inner voice. I will do what feels right, and peace will be my reward. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 11 - A Vision For You Now and then a serious drinker, being dry at the moment says, “I don’t miss it at all. Feel better. Work better. Having a better time.” As ex-problem drinkers, we smile at such a sally. We know our friend is like a boy whistling in the dark to keep up his spirits. He fools himself. Inwardly he would give anything to take half a dozen drinks and get away with them. He will presently try the old game again, for he isn’t happy about his sobriety. He cannot picture life without alcohol. Some day he will be unable to imagine life either with alcohol or without it. Then he will know loneliness such as few do. He will be at the jumping-off place. He will wish for the end. pp. 151-152 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories The Housewife Who Drank At Home She hid her bottles in clothes hampers and dresser drawers. In A.A., she discovered she had lost nothing and had found everything. I never knew which came first, the thinking or the drinking. If I could only stop thinking, I wouldn't drink. If I could only stop drinking, maybe I wouldn't think. But they were all mixed up together, and I was all mixed up inside. And yet I had to have that drink. You know the deteriorating effects, the disintegrating effects, of chronic wine-drinking. I cared nothing about my personal appearance. I didn't care what I looked like; I didn't care what I did. To me, taking a bath was just being in a place with a bottle where I could drink in privacy. I had to have ti with me at night, in case I woke up and needed that drink. p. 297 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Tradition Seven - "Every A.A. group ought to be fully self-supporting, declining outside contributions. " Despite these misgivings, we had to recognize the fact that A.A. had to function. Meeting places cost something. To save whole areas from turmoil, small offices had to be set up, telephones installed, and a few full-time secretaries hired. Over many protests, these things were accomplished. We saw that if they weren't, the man coming in the door couldn't get a break. These simple services would require small sums of money which we could and would pay ourselves. At last the pendulum stopped swinging and pointed straight at Tradition Seven as it reads today. pp. 161-162 ************************************************** ********* "Let go of your attachment to being right, and suddenly your mind is more open. You're able to benefit from the unique viewpoints of others, without being crippled by your own judgment." --Ralph Marston "Once you face your fear, nothing is ever as hard as you think." --Olivia Newton-John A clean conscience makes a soft pillow. --unknown A lot of kneeling will keep you in good standing. --unknown All I have to do is make the right choices. I will always know which they are, when I ask for guidance. --unknown I will look to each moment with child-like eyes. I'll find joy and contentment. --unknown Adventure is not outside a man; it is within. --David Grayson *********************************************** Father Leo's Daily Meditation REALITY "Humankind cannot bear very much reality." -- T. S. Eliot I wonder why we find it hard to face reality? I preferred to escape from my problems, avoid who I was, not deal with issues of God, relationships or loneliness --- and live in a world of "make believe". However, it did not work. The pain of being a "fake" and living a lie became too great so I asked for help. Today I am on a journey towards reality and it is a spiritual journey. I know I will never be completely real. A part of me will always be "diseased". I must live and treat my compulsive behavior on a daily basis --- but my life is getting better, and I am slowly growing in an understanding of who I am and what I need. God, let me be as real as I can be. ************************************************** ********* Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. Ephesians 6:10-18 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration As you wake, remember that God is the first one waiting to talk with you. Good morning, Lord. Let's have a grand and wonderful day. Our time here is short and there is still so much to be done. Lord, please let me do a little more for You today so that the world may be a little better because of me. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Difficult People By giving unconditional love...we become more loving, and by sharing spiritual growth we become more spiritual." Basic Text, p.99 Most of us have one or two exceptionally difficult people in our lives. How do we deal with such a person in our recovery? First, we take our own inventory. Have we wronged this person? Has some action or attitude of ours served as an invitation for the kind of treatment they have given us? If so, we will want to clear the air, admit we have been wrong, and ask our Higher Power to remove whatever defects may prevent us from being helpful and constructive. Next, as people seeking to live spiritually oriented lives, we approach the problem from the other person's point of view. They may be faced with any number of challenges we either fail to consider or know nothing about, challenges that cause them to be unpleasant. As it's said, we seek in recovery "to forgive rather than be forgiven; to understand rather than be understood." Finally, if it is within our power, we seek ways to help others overcome their challenges without injuring their dignity. We pray for their well-being and spiritual growth and for the ability to offer them the unconditional love that has meant so much to us in our recovery. We cannot change the difficult people in our lives, nor can we please everyone. But by applying the spiritual principles we've learned in NA, we can learn to love them. Just for today: Higher Power, help me serve other people, not demand that they serve me. pg. 235 ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Many of our fears are tissue-paper-thin, and a single courageous step would carry us clear through them. --Brendan Francis There was a huge slide at the park and Jason was afraid to go on it. There were so many steps to climb to reach the top. All of his friends were climbing up the steps and yelling as they came down the long rolling slide. "Come on," said his friend Steve. "It's lots of fun!" "Isn't it scary?" asked Jason. "A little bit," answered Steve, "but you get used to it." He ran off to go again. Jason walked to the steps of the slide, his heart pounding in his chest. Slowly he placed his foot on the first step and lifted himself up. Courageously he climbed the ladder. When he reached the high platform he felt as if he were standing on top of the world. We can learn from Jason that by taking that first step we can experience many exciting and wonderful things. We have all done it before, on the slide, on a bicycle, in school. Why not again? What fear can I walk through today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. There is overwhelming evidence that the higher the level of self-esteem, the more likely one will treat others with respect, kindness, and generosity. People who do not experience self-love have little or no capacity to love others. --Nathaniel Branden We cannot hang on to feelings of shame and guilt and still hope to become better people. How did these feelings begin? If we were treated badly by people, we need to be honest about what happened so we can resolve it and move on. Have we perpetuated our feelings by acting disrespectfully ourselves? Then we need to take a thorough inventory of our wrongdoings, admit them, make repairs, and let them go. We may wallow in shame because facing it feels too frightening. Often, we believe our shame is greater than that of others. This belief is usually untrue and grandiose. It's part of how we isolate ourselves. We don't have to face it alone. We have the help of other men and women who can listen to our pain and tell us about their experiences. Today, may I find the courage to face my shame and assert my right to self-esteem. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Anything forced into manifestation through personal will is always "ill got" and has "ever bad success." --Florence Scovel Shinn The main thrust of our recovery is to attune ourselves to God's will, struggling no longer to impose our own. The pain we've endured in past years was often of our own making. We controlled situations until we managed to force the outcome we desired, only to realize it didn't offer happiness. It was, instead, a bitter ending to the struggle. When we want something or someone to play by our rules, we can expect barriers. And when the barriers don't give way with a gentle push, we should consider it a clue that we are off course. When we want what God wants for us, the barriers, if any, will fall away. What God wants for us at every moment is growth and happiness. When we step away from our ego and develop a selfless posture toward life, we'll find serenity in the midst of any turmoil. Serenity is God's promise. When we get in line with God's will, we'll find peace. I will know God's will if I will listen to my inner voice. I will do what feels right, and peace will be my reward. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Friends Don't overlook the value of friendship. Don't neglect friends. Friends are a joy. Adult friendships can be a good place for us to learn to have fun and to appreciate how much fun we can have with a friend. Friends can be a comfort. Who knows us better, or is more able to give us support, than a good friend? A friendship is a comfortable place to be ourselves. Often, our choice of friends will reflect the issue we're working on. Giving and receiving support will help both people grow. Some friendships wax and wane, going through cycles throughout the years. Some trail off when one person outgrows the other. Certainly, we will have trials and tests in friendships and, at times, be called on to practice our recovery behaviors. But some friendships will last a lifetime. There are special love relationships, and there are friendships. Sometimes, our friendships - especially recovery friendships - can be special love relationships too. Today, I will reach out to a friend. I will let myself enjoy the comfort, joys, and enduring quality of my friendships. Today is a day of opportunities. I am open and ready to find them all, knowing that I am receiving all the guidance I need to be forward and be happy. --Ruth Fishel ***** Journey to the Heart Come Back to Center Come back to center, that place in you that is still, calm, quiet, and connected. Your center is a place you can trust. It connects the body, mind, heart, and soul. It connects truth, your inner voice, and the Divine. Your best work comes from there. Your most loving times come from there.Your insights, awarenesses, and guidance come from being there, at that place. Your best decisions and finest moments come from that place. Your center is a place that is quietly confident, unassuming, spontaneous, and free. It is gentle and kind, but it has the power to defend instinctively against attack. Your center is a place that is naturally joyful and at peace. It is accepting, nonjudgemental, and it channels the voice of your heart. It knows perfect timing. It knows the rhythm of the universe, the rhythm of all creation, and it delights in its connection to that rhythm. If you must leave your center to learn a lesson, feel a feeling, or experience something new, do that. Take all the side trips you are called to. But come back to your center when you're done. And go to your center first, before you go anywhere else. ***** more language of letting go Thanks for the lessons People say everything happens for a reason and God has a Plan for it all. I believe things do happen for a reason. And I believe in God's Plan. But if we don't learn the lesson from the circumstance and let ourselves completely heal from it-- whether it's the past or today-- the things that happen for a reason will just keep happening over and over again. --Playing It by Heart "I learned something today," a woman said to me. "Before I can completely let go of anything or anyone, I need to thank the person and the experience for what it taught me." Sometimes, the last thin cord binding us to that person or experience, that part of our lives that we're trying so valiantly to be free from, can be effectively snipped with the shears of gratitude. Are you hanging on to a resentment for that ex or a friend from days long past? Are you still harboring bitterness about a job or business deal gone bad? Are you holding on to a part of your life that was painful with bitterness and resentment? Are you holding on to a particularly good time or cycle you had with someone, afraid that if things change and you let the past go and come into now, things won't be quite as good? Maybe you needed that relationship to teach you about a part of yourself. Maybe you learned compassion or more about what you wanted from life. Maybe that friend, even though he or she isn't in your life anymore, helped you open up a part of yourself that was shut down and needed to be activated and set free. What about those painful experiences? You learned something, probably a lot, from them,too. And that experience that was so fulfilling? That, too, needs to be let go of if we're going to open our hearts to the new. Apply a dose of gratitude. Thank the experience for being in your life. Thank that ex, or that friend, or that business, or that boss. Thank them over and over again in your mind. Deliberately sit down and figure out what the lessons and gifts were. If you can't see them, ask to be shown. Move a step closer to letting go and becoming free by being grateful for how that person or experience enriched your life. God, thank you for the past. Help me let go with gratitude, so that I can live more fully and joyfully now. ***** Letting Your Voice Be Heard Writing Your Story by Madisyn Taylor Writing your own story can provide an outlet which can help purge any frustration, anxiety, or long-dormant feelings. Everyone, at one time or another, has wanted to express his or her story. Writing a memoir to read privately, share with family or friends, or publish is an emotionally satisfying way to gain perspective on your experiences and to share your unique voice. We’ve all experienced feelings and events in our lives that we are longing to write down. Giving into that urge also can provide an outlet which can help purge any frustration, anxiety, or long-dormant feelings. No one else has to read it. You may even want to write your story without reading it afterward and put it away to read in the future. Satisfying the need to tell your story is not predicated upon your writing ability. It does, however take effort to write down the truth in detail. Your memories, captured on paper as descriptive scenes, sights, sounds, and scents, may at first seem disconnected or incomplete. But rest assured that you possess the ability to shape your recollections into stories. Writing your story is different from journaling. Everyone wants to be heard and know that they matter. Reading your story to others meets the human need to be heard. Writing your story helps validate your life. We all want to know that what we have to say matters. And when you finish writing, even you may be surprised at what you have accomplished. Your story can encompass as much or as little of your life as you prefer. You may surprise yourself with new insights, or you may find yourself exploring your roots, your identity, and your future through your words. Allow your writing to guide you and write as truthfully as possible. Don’t worry about what others will think of your personal journey, your style of writing, or your words. Research has shown that writing a narrative filled with feelings and perceptions can create long-term health benefits. As you write, remember to express compassion and understanding toward yourself, particularly when writing about traumatic events. If you are a young person, you can add to your life story as you grow older. Your writing may even help family members know you better or understand themselves more. Most importantly, in writing your personal story, you are expressing yourself in a permanent way, giving a gift to your future self, and letting your voice be heard. Published with permission from Daily OM ******************************************* One More Day If you allow men to use you for your own purpose, they will use your for theirs. – Aescop When we attend a party, isn’t it always the person with the cast or someone who just had surgery who gets all the attention? At first, when our health changes, we may try to play other people for sympathy. We finally begin to understand that most of us have different needs. Ours are more permanent than the needs of a person with a broken leg. Upon realizing this, we could become angry that our needs aren’t being anticipated. After being ill for a while, we realize it’s up to us to let others know what we are feeling and what our needs are. Then we can look for understanding, not pity. Exploiting the role of “sick person” is one behavior I need to guard against. I will accept this as a personal challenge. ***** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day The Program’s Fourth Step suggests that we make a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves. For some of us, no challenge seems more formidable; there’s nothing more difficult than facing ourselves as we really are. We flee from one wrong-doing after another as they catch up with us, forever making excuses, pleading always that our virtues in other areas far outweigh our flaws. Yet once we become willing to look squarely and self-searchingly at ourselves, we’re then able to illuminate the dark and negative side of our natures with new vision, action, and grace. Am I willing to open my eyes and step out into the sunlight? Today I Pray May my Higher Power stop me in my tracks if I am running away from myself. For I will never overcome my misdeeds, or the flaws in which character which brought them about, by letting them chase me. May I slow down and turn to face them with the most trusty weapon I know … truth. Today I Will Remember I will not be a fugitive from myself. ******************************************* Food for Thought. Be Prepared We need to be prepared for times when we will be tempted to eat the wrong kind of food. This may mean eating our planned meal before going to an event where the right food may not be available. It may mean adjusting our meal schedule so that we can wait to eat until after an event where the wrong kind of food is served. In the past, we may have used the excuse of not hurting someone's feelings in order to rationalize a deviation from our food plan. No hostess should expect a guest to consume food to which he or she is allergic. We alone are responsible for what goes into our mouths. If we are faced with food, which will activate our illness, it is better to be hungry than to eat what makes us sick. When we are willing to go to any lengths to maintain abstinence, we can find a way to deal with dangerous food situations. "No, thank you" is a very useful tool. May I be prepared for times of temptation. ***************************************** One Day At A Time JOY “Joy is not in things, it is in us.” Richard Wagner Growing up in a household of people in need of recovery, one of the things I learned early on is that things can bring happiness. None of us realized that the happiness was very temporary, never seeing us through what feeling we were wanting to stuff or what hurt hole deep inside us needed filling. I had so many feelings and so many holes inside me that I didn't have near enough money for the things I needed. What hurting 7-year old in a sick family does? Given that, it seems natural that I turned to food to help fill holes. Just another "thing," but at least the fridge was always too full, and I didn't have to worry about the money aspect. But things caused pain too. I learned that my parents gave more expensive and better things to those people they liked more and wanted to please. I was not one of those people; my brother was. I noted every gift and compared, and set myself up for more hurt that could only be soothed in the kitchen because I didn't know any other way. The food "things" I ran to have caused less joy in my life than any of the things I've bought. I've been fat since I was four, torturing my body over the years by alternating starvation with massive bingeing and with purging. I was never good enough because I've never been thin enough except for that growth spurt when I was nine. Then I found the Twelve Steps. As a result of working the Steps, I've found me. As a result of finding me and learning to fill hurtful holes by feeling rather than with things or food, I've truly found the joy that is in me. One Day at a Time . . . I will remind myself that things and food do not bring happiness; joy is within. ~ Rhonda H. ~ ***************************************** Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Just for Today. Day by Day. 24-hour program. Don't use today, forget about yesterday and tomorrow. Only 24 hours at a time. One day at a time. Take a daily inventory. All of these sayings are trying to enforce the idea that our program is a NOW program. The sooner you live in the now, the sooner you will find freedom. Grant me the patience to live in this hour by the principles that are growing in my heart. I Will Live in My Body as Well as My Head I cannot hold onto life any more than I can hold onto a rain storm, a cloud or a sun set. I will not know how to be, what to do or how to act if I am ever living in my head. I have to live in my body, too, in the present, spontaneously part of the moment with head and heart in balance so I can sense where I am and where the current of life is taking me. So that we can be free of what is in the way of manifesting our own good. So that we can live in the present unencumbered with unresolved pain from the past. So that we can stop repeating the same old dysfunctional patterns from our past in our relationships in the present. Emotional balance allows us to live in this alive and ever changing present so that we can respond spontaneously to any given moment or any given situation. So that we have the inner balance to be responsive, flexible and alive. So that we can live in the present. Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote People in our society stress that we ought to be happy. If you're not happy something is wrong, we are lead to believe. Yet, unhappiness is not a symptom of sickness, it is an expression of life, a natural reaction to situations we don't like. When **** happens, you don't have to like it. I will not be unhappy about being unhappy. Living in my head limits my spontaneity. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote People in our society stress that we ought to be happy. If you're not happy something is wrong, we are lead to believe. Yet, unhappiness is not a symptom of sickness, it is an expression of life, a natural reaction to situations we don't like. When **** happens, you don't have to like it. I will not be unhappy about being unhappy. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book If you live on the edge of the program, you might fall off. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today is a day of opportunities. I am open and ready to find them all, knowing that I am receiving all the guidance I need to be forward and be happy. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Seven days without a meeting makes one weak. - Anon.
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AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K. When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time! God says that each of us is worth loving. |
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