Choices

[MajestyJo]

“Reminding ourselves that we have decided to go to any lengths to find a spiritual experience, we ask that we be given strength and direction to do the right thing, no matter what the personal consequences may be.”

Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, Into Action, pg. 79.

Over the years I have heard several people say, what is a spiritual experience and awakening. For me, it was me being able to do something that I was unable to do by and for myself before recovery.

Things like setting boundaries, being able to say no, not right now, when I have the times, not in the moment. The ability to allow someone to be themselves, and me not having to tell them the errors of their way and to allow the person to just be. To respect myself and know that I deserve recovery and that I did not have to be subject to abuse, to play the roles of martyr, victim, rescuer or any other “lie” that someone wanted me to live for ‘their’ sake.

The realization that I was the problem, not the substance. That I just used the substance to escape my reality and to escape me. That is wasn’t just alcohol and drugs, I had used sex, relationships, food, work, TV, books, etc. all to not have to look at me and the world around me.

The realization that when I took away that substance, their was a void within me and it would continue to be if I did not fill it up with spiritual concepts and living. The getting out of self and helping another still suffering addict. T

To care and share with another the unconditional love and the Fellowship of the Spirit which can be found in the rooms of Recovery. The awareness that although I am sick, that through the God of my understanding, I can heal and become the type of person He would have me be and live in faith instead of fear today.

There never seem to be an end to a day, I used to fill up my day. Today there are not enough hours. I must always be grateful for “busy” but I must never be too busy to share with others how I got ‘busy’ today. Please share with me your spiritual experiences and awareness so that those who are new can have hope, and have a desire to continue on this journey of freedom we call recovery.

We cannot choose happiness for ourselves or for another; we can’t tell where that will lie. We can only choose whether we will indulge ourselves in that precious moment, or whether we will renounce ourselves in the present moment, for the sake of obeying the Divine voice within us, for the sake of being true to all the motives that sanctify our lives. I know this belief is hard; it has slipped from me again and again; but I have felt that if I let it go forever, I should have no light through the darkness of this life. I pray that I will one day come completely out of the dark and into the light. I should start by getting out of my own way. I can’t. He can. Think I’ll let Him. Just for today, Lord, protect me from myself. Thanks for letting me share.

Originally posted in 2004

So good to still find that was good then is still good in today 10 years later. The program works when I work it. I have to take the words off the pages of the literature and apply it to my life. Through the program of recovery, I am given freedom of choice. Just for today, I choose not to use.

http://www.whats-your-sign.com/symbo...r-meaning.html