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October 31
Daily Reflections AVOIDING CONTROVERSY All history affords us the spectacle of striving nations and groups finally torn asunder because they were designed for, or tempted into, controversy. Others fell apart because of sheer self-righteousness while trying to enforce upon the rest of mankind some millennium of their own specification. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 176 As an A.A. member and sponsor, I know I can cause real damage if I yield to temptation and give opinions and advice on another's medical, marital, or religious problems. I am not a doctor, counselor, or lawyer. I cannot tell anyone how he or she should live; however, I can share how I came through similar situations without drinking, and how A.A.'s Steps and Traditions help me in dealing with my life. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day I have more peace and contentment. Life has fallen into place. The pieces of the jigsaw puzzle have found their correct position. Life is whole, all of one piece. I am not cast hither and yon on every wind of circumstance or fancy. I am no longer a dry leaf cast up and away by the breeze. I have found my place of rest, my place where I belong. I am content. I do not vainly wish for things I cannot have. I have "the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference." Have I found contentment in A.A.? Meditation For The Day In all of us there is an inner consciousness that tells of God, an inner voice that speaks to our hearts. It is a voice that speaks to us intimately, personally, in a time of quiet meditation. It is like a lamp unto our feet and a light unto your path. We can reach out into the darkness and figuratively touch the hand of God. As the Big Book puts it: "Deep down in every man, woman and child is the fundamental idea of God. We can find the Great Reality deep down within us. And when we find it, it changes our whole attitude toward life." Prayer For The Day I pray that I may follow the leading of the inner voice. I pray that I may not turn a deaf ear to the urging of my conscience. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Comradeship in Peril, p. 302 We A.A.'s are like the passengers of a great liner the moment after rescue from shipwreck, when camaraderie, joyousness, and democracy pervade the vessel from steerage to captain's table. Unlike the feelings of the ship's passengers, however, our joy in escape from disaster does not subside as we go our individual ways. The feeling of sharing in a common peril--relapse into alcoholism--continues to be an important element in the powerful cement which binds us of A.A. together. << << << >> >> >> Our first woman alcoholic had been a patient of Dr. Harry Tiebout's, and he had handed her a prepublication manuscript copy of the Big Book. The first reading made her rebellious, but the second convinced her. Presently she came to a meeting held in our living room, and from there she returned to the sanitarium carrying this classic message to a fellow patient: "We aren't alone any more." 1. Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 17 2. A.A. Comes Of Age, p. 18 ************************************************** ********* Walk In Dry Places Be still--- for a while, anyhow. God's will for us. The bible reminds us: "Be still, and know that I am God." What does this say to the recovering alcoholic who is struggling against a tidal wave of problems? It must be a reminder that our true place and right work is part of a great purpose, though we may still not know who we fit into the larger plan. We can know, however, that God's plan will include peaceful actions, just and moral solutions, and results that are wholly beneficial to all concerned. One does not have to be a theologian to decide that staying sober is part of God's will for us. That's why we can expect the support of Higher Power at all times, even when we feel fearful and abused. Aside from staying sober, each of us will have individual work and responsibilities in life. We should be careful not to measure anyone's success--- including our own--- against worldly standards. If God is in charge, wherever we are and whatever we happen to be doing can a part of the divine will. In keeping sober today, I'll know that I'm carrying out God's will. I'll also be open to unexpected opportunities to carry out God's directions. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple A man who has committed a mistake and doesn’t correct it is committing another mistake. ---Confucius Step Ten tell us that when we are wrong, we must “promptly” admit it. We aren’t used to admitting our mistakes. We defend ourselves and blame others. This is call denial. Denial is bad for two reasons. First, it keeps from learning from our mistakes, so we keep making them. Second, we don’t listen to others, so we close ourselves and become lonely. What a relief it is to admit our wrongs! We don’t have to keep trying to do things the hard way. We can learn new way to think and act that will work better for us. We can let other people be our teachers. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me out of denial, so I can see the changes I need to make. Action for the Day: Today, If I disagree with someone, I’ll promptly admit when I’m wrong. If I’m right, I’ll be gentle. I don’t have to prove anything. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning It's a simple formula; do your best and somebody might like it. --Dorothy Baker We're never guaranteed success by others' standards. However, if we do our best according to the standards we think God has in mind, we'll be successful. And from God we'll always receive unconditional love and acceptance. In the past many of us were haunted by fears that our best wasn't good enough. And not infrequently those fears hindered our performance, thus validating our fears. We can slip back into those immobilizing fears if we don't attend, with vigilance, to the program and its suggestions. Our higher power will help us do whatever task lies before us. And no task will be ours except those for which we've been readied. Our job is simply to go forth, taking God as our partner, and set about completing the task. We will not falter if we remember where our strength rests, where the guidance lies. Self-esteem is one of the byproducts of a job done with God's help. An additional byproduct is that we learn more quickly to rely on God's direction and strength the next time, thus reducing the time we give to fear. I can be successful today, in every endeavor, if I let God manage my moves. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 8 - TO WIVES How could men who loved their wives and children be so unthinking, so callous, so cruel? There could be no love in such persons, we thought. And just as we were being convinced of their heartlessness, they would surprise us with fresh resolves and new attentions. For a while they would be their old sweet selves, only to dash the new structure of affection to pieces once more. Asked why they commenced to drink again, they would reply with some silly excuse, or none. It was so baffling, so heartbreaking. Could we have been so mistaken in the men we married? When drinking, they were strangers. Sometimes they were so inaccessible that it seemed as though a great wall had been built around them. p. 107 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories LISTENING TO THE WIND - It took an "angel" to introduce this Native American woman to A.A. and recovery. When I was fifteen years old, I arrived alone in San Francisco with a guitar, a small suitcase, and $30. I went to several taverns and coffeehouses in search of a job singing. I believed I could pursue a career as a performer. Three days later I found myself sleeping in a doorway to stay out of the rain that had fallen all day. I was broke and cold, and had nowhere else to go. The only thing I had left was my pride, which prevented me from trying to reach my brother by phone or finding my way back to the only people who ever really knew me. pp. 458-459 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves." Nor is the quest for security always expressed in terms of money. How frequently we see a frightened human being determined to depend completely upon a stronger person for guidance and protection. This weak one, failing to meet life's responsibilities with his own resources, never grows up. Disillusionment and helplessness are his lot. In time all his protectors either flee or die, and he is once more left alone and afraid. p. 43 ************************************************** ********* Let go your memories of a dark past in order to have a bright future. --unknown The solution is simple. The solution is spiritual. --unknown F A I T H = Fantastic Adventures In Trusting Him. The greatest gift that you can give yourself is a little bit of your own attention. --Anthony J. D'Angelo The best gifts are those which expect no return. --Norwegian proverb "The pleasure you get from your life is equal to the attitude you put into it." --Unknown One person says, "When I feel far from God, I ask myself: Who moved?" God is always there. Today I will pray for the wisdom to stay close to my spiritual source, the Creator Spirit. --unknown "If you think you're having a bad day, think again, and again and again and again until something good comes to mind." --Rev. Larry Hickey *********************************************** Father Leo's Daily Meditation SAINTS/SINNERS "Every saint has a past and every sinner a future." -- Oscar Wilde I must not allow the painful things of my past to affect what I can do today. Guilt is a killer if I allow it power in my life. I have made my amends. I have apologized to those I hurt. Today I begin the rest of my life. Alcoholism produces behavior that causes guilt and shame. In this sense it is different from so many other diseases. The shame and guilt I felt for years grew out of my alcoholic behavior and I need to remember that I am not responsible for being alcoholic. It is not my fault. However, with the knowledge and acceptance of the disease comes a determination to live responsibly. I have a sense of responsibility in my recovery. Spirituality involves being a responsible person. The awareness and acceptance of my past can help create a loving future. Today I understand that in the failures of the past are sown the seeds of greatness. ************************************************** ********* If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast. Psalm 139 : 9.10 "Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let you heart take courage; wait for the Lord!" Psalm 27:14 For it is God who is at work in you, both to will and to work for His good pleasure. Philippians 2:13 Keep on loving each other as brothers. Do not forget to entertain strangers, for by so doing some people have entertained angels without knowing it. Hebrews 13:1-2 Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you." So we say with confidence, "The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. What can man do to me?" Hebrews 13:5-6 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Allow yourself the right to say no when the world asks too much of you. Lord, help me to stay focused on my goals and responsibilites so that I have time for that which is important to me. Our time here is short and there is still so much to be done. Lord, please let me do a little more for You today so that the world may be a little better because of me. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Our Relationship With A Higher Power "Ongoing recovery is dependent on our relationship with a loving God who cares for us and will do for us what we find impossible to do for ourselves." Basic Text, p.96 Working the Twelve Steps of Narcotics Anonymous gives us a fresh start in life and some guidance for living in the world. But the steps are more than a fresh start. When we do our best to work the steps, we develop a relationship with our personal Higher Power. In the Third Step, we decide to allow a loving God to influence our lives. Much of the courage, trust, and willingness we need to continue through the succeeding steps comes from this decision. In the Seventh Step, we go even further by asking this Higher Power to change our lives. The Eleventh Step is a way for us to improve the relationship. Recovery is a process of growth and change in which our lives are renewed. The Twelve Steps are the roadmap, the specific directions we take in order to continue in recovery. But the support we need to proceed with each step comes from our faith in a Higher Power, the belief that all will be well. Faith gives us courage to act. Each step we work is supported by our relationship with a loving God. Just for today: I will remember that the source of my courage and willingness is my relationship with my Higher Power. pg. 317 ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. The only sense that is common in the long run is the sense of change--and we all instinctively avoid it. --E. B. White Nature reveals to us a world that is always changing. No two sunsets are alike. Winter brings invigorating days while spring brings new buds and blossoms every day. Summer brings lazy warmth and star-filled evenings while fall brings crisp afternoons and a sense of nostalgia. Even though nature shows us a constantly changing world, we often resist the changes in our own lives. Changes can be both hard and sad, yet they are a part of life. Perhaps we are moving on to a new school or a new neighborhood, or perhaps we are feeling the changes that come with a divorce in the family. With every change we say a sad goodbye to something old, something familiar--in the same way we feel sadness for summer's end when the first leaves begin to fall. Yet every change also offers us the excitement and potential of a new season--with its own opportunity for new smells, special gifts, and invigorating days. How have I changed today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Superficiality is the curse of our age. The doctrine of instant satisfaction is a primary spiritual problem. --Richard J. Foster As we have reached for instant cures, one-minute answers, and quick highs, we have developed lifestyles that foreclosed deeper possibilities. For instance, when we fail to stay and resolve conflicts in a relationship, we miss the joys of a renewed understanding. Our spiritual development comes in steps, small but meaningful increments that build over a period of time. Many of us have not been patient men and our newfound spiritual life is teaching us that the quickest, most efficient answer isn't always best. Today, our greatest temptation may be to grab for the fast solutions rather than allowing time for small but important steps to occur. When we are frustrated, it will help to remember the difficulty may lie in our insistence on a quick answer. Sometimes simply being true to ourselves and standing as a witness while the answer develops are all that is asked of us. I will have faith that time is on my side and it will teach me valuable things. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. It's a simple formula; do your best and somebody might like it. --Dorothy Baker We're never guaranteed success by others' standards. However, if we do our best according to the standards we think God has in mind, we'll be successful. And from God we'll always receive unconditional love and acceptance. In the past many of us were haunted by fears that our best wasn't good enough. And not infrequently those fears hindered our performance, thus validating our fears. We can slip back into those immobilizing fears if we don't attend, with vigilance, to the program and its suggestions. Our higher power will help us do whatever task lies before us. And no task will be ours except those for which we've been readied. Our job is simply to go forth, taking God as our partner, and set about completing the task. We will not falter if we remember where our strength rests, where the guidance lies. Self-esteem is one of the byproducts of a job done with God's help. An additional byproduct is that we learn more quickly to rely on God's direction and strength the next time, thus reducing the time we give to fear. I can be successful today, in every endeavor, if I let God manage my moves. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. All Our Needs And my God shall supply every need of yours according to His riches in glory... --Phil. 4:19 This verse has helped me many times. It has helped me when I have wondered where my next friend bit of wisdom, insight, or meal was coming from. Everything I need today shall be supplied to me. People, jobs, what we have to our immediate disposal, are not our source. We have tapped into a Greater Source, a source of infinite and immediate supply: God and His Universe. Our task is to allow ourselves to come into harmony with our Source. Our task is to believe in, and look to, our true Source. Our task is to release fear; negative thinking, limitations, and short supply thinking. Everything we need shall be provided to us. Let it become a natural response to all situations, and all situations of need. Reject fear. Reject short supply and limited thinking notions. Be open to abundance. Cherish need because it is part of our relationship to God and His Universe. God has planned to meet our every need, has created the need within us, so God can supply. No need is too small or too great. If we care and value our need, God will too. Our part is taking responsibility for owning the need. Our part is giving the need to the Universe. Our part is letting go, in faith. Our part is giving God permission to meet our needs by believing we deserve to have our needs - and wants - met. Our part is healthy giving, not out of caretaking, guilt, obligation, and codependency, but out of a healthy relationship with ourselves, God, and all of God's creations. Our part is simply to be who we are, and love being that. Today, I will practice the belief that all my needs today shall be met. I will step into harmony with God and His Universe, knowing that I count. Today I reach out and touch. --Ruth Fishel ************************************ Journey To The Heart October 31 Something Important Is Happening Now There’s never a time when nothing is happening. Something is always taking place. Growth is occurring. We’re evolving, transforming, working things out, incorporating our last lesson, preparing for our next. Something is happening. We just don’t always see it. And that’s how it’s meant to be. When we see, when we know too much too soon, it’s easy to let our heads get in the way. We think we have to control, have to force, have to make it happen, have to do something. In a gentle but wise way, the universe takes into account our fears and our natures. It doesn’t let us know too much too soon. It doesn’t spoil the surprise. It doesn’t want us to spoil it either. Open your heart to the universe. Trust that something is always happening. And often, it’s much different and better than you think. ***** more language of letting go Practice awareness of God I can remember the moment when I was willing to be truly vulnerable with life again. I was walking around in a beach town,talking to my friend. I was talking about my safe little life back in Stillwater, Minnesota, where I though I had everything under control. I had avoided living in big cities and thought small town living would be safe. In that small town, working for its daily newspaper, I had found all the potential held in life. I got that big break that put me, an unknown author, on the New York Times best-seller list. And my son had died. Small town life wasn't as limiting as I feared or as safe as I had hoped. I told my friend about the time, many years later, I was wandering around the Middle East. I was talking to my daughter on a cell phone. She was on her cell,too, driving through the heart of Los Angeles. "Aren't you scared over there?" she asked. "Isn't your life in danger?" Just then a man honked at her. I heard him scream through her window, "If you don't get that car out of the way, I'm going to have you killed." "Complete safety is an illusion," I said to my friend. "Maybe the only time we're really safe is when we're willing to acknowledge how vulnerable we really are, no matter what we're doing, and be okay with that." "Ask God to be with me," I said to an older woman who was my mentor at the time. "Foolish child," she said. "You don't have to ask God to be with you. He's already there, wherever you are." God, help me feel safe, comfortable, and in your presence wherever I am today. ***** Five Things A Self-Esteem Exercise by Madisyn Taylor Having low self-esteem is a common issue and with some introspection you can start to loosen the grip of this negative thought pattern. Our primary relationship in life is with our selves. No one else goes through every experience in life with us. We are our one permanent companion, yet we are often our worst critic. To remind ourselves of our magnificence, we can do this exercise: “Five Things I Like About Myself.” Begin by writing down at least five things that you like about yourself. This is not the time to be modest. If you are having trouble coming up with a total of five items, you know that this exercise can really benefit you. Be sure to include more than your physical attributes on your list, since our bodies are only part of who we are. If you are still struggling with what to include on your list, think of what you like about your favorite people, because these traits are probably qualities that you possess too. Another way to complete your list is to think of five things you don’t like about yourself and find something about these traits that you can like. Continue this process for a week, thinking of five new things you like about yourself everyday. At the end of the week, read the list aloud to yourself while standing in front of a mirror. Instead of looking for flaws to fix, allow the mirror to reflect your magnificence. You may feel silly about standing in front of a mirror and reading aloud a list of your admirable attributes, but it might just bring a smile to your face and change the way you see yourself. Remember, it is when you feel the most resistant that this exercise can benefit you the most. Because we are constantly looking at the world, instead of looking at ourselves, we don’t often see what’s magnificent about ourselves that others do. When we take the time to experience ourselves the way we would experience someone we love and admire, we become our best companion and supporter on life’s journey. Published with permission from Daily OM ************************************ A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day If I’m to continue growing in The Program, I must literally “get wise to myself.” I must remember that for most of my life I’ve been terribly self-deceived. The sin of pride has been at the root of most of my self-deception, usually masquerading under the guise of some virtue. I must work continually to uncover pride in all its subtle forms, lest it stop me in my tracks and push me backward once again to the brink of disaster. When it comes to pride, do I believe, in Emerson’s words, that “it is impossible for a man to be cheated by anyone but himself…?” Today I Pray May I know that button-popping pride is inappropriate for me as a recovering addict. It hides my faults for me. It turns people off and gets in the way of my helping others. It halts my progress because it makes me think I’ve done enough self-searching and I’m “cured.” I pray to my Higher Power that I may be realistic enough to accept my success in The Program without giving in to pride. Today I Will Remember Pride halts progress. ************************************ One More Day The human body is the best picture of the human soul. – Ludwig Wittgenstein As people walk down the street, we can usually spot those with a sense of pride in themselves. How people look is often an indicator of their self-esteem. The changes in our lives challenge us to continue feeling good about ourselves despite stress or diminished health. Any change can be frightening. Unfortunately, sometimes we let problems overtake us, and we begin to look and act like people who feel unwell. We can take stock of our lives at this time and remember how much we can still do well. We are capable individuals; we can make our own decisions about how we want to conduct our lives. This renewed awareness strengthens our self esteem, and the image we convey to others is one of pride. There are some things I just cannot change. Today, I will dwell on what I can do for myself. ************************************ Food For Thought Gifts of the Spirit Through the OA program, we come to desire spiritual gifts as well as material necessities. Experience shows us that serenity is priceless and something to be desired more than unnecessary food. Courage, wisdom, faith, hope, love, and humility - these are all spiritual gifts, which come to us from our Higher Power as we abstain and work our program. As we receive these gifts of the spirit, we are able to share them with others. Giving them away to our families and friends ensures that we will receive them more abundantly ourselves. We come to realize that a small gift of time and attention can mean more than an expensive material present. God's gifts are available to us whenever we are open to receive them. By abstaining from compulsive overeating, we make our spirits ready to accept their rightful gifts. I pray that I may be ready to accept Your spiritual gifts. ***************************************** One Day At A Time SERVICE “Service is the rent that you pay for room on this earth.”" Shirley Chisholm Midway through my first fourth step someone asked me to sponsor her. I was thrilled and eager to share my experience, strength and hope. As my work with my sponsee progressed, something began to happen in my own program. All that I had learned and was sharing with my sponsee reminded me of where I came from and how far I had progressed. I found that my recovery was strengthened through this process of giving away my experiences in program. This service allowed me to keep what I had received. It is vital for me that I serve the program of OA in all different manners: as a sponsor; as a leader of a step meeting; as treasurer of a local meeting; and by reaching out to newcomers, people in relapse, and others in the OA fellowship. The more I give, the more I receive. One day at a time... I will give service to the OA fellowship so that I may remain in recovery. ~ Cindi L. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote While our literature has preserved the integrity of the A.A. message, sweeping changes in society as a whole are reflected in new customs and practices within the Fellowship. Taking advantage of technological advances, for example, A.A. members with computers can participate in meetings online, sharing with fellow alcoholics across the country or around the world. Fundamentally, though, the difference between an electronic meeting and the home group around the corner is only one of format. - Pg. xxiv - 4th. Ed. - Forward To Fourth Edition Hour To Hour - Book - Quote It doesn't cost a lot of money for us to recover. It costs a lot of time. We have to be diligent and program consciousness from this hour to the next, every hour for the rest of our lives. We 'have' to do it, until we 'want' to do it. I embrace our program in gratitude. Resentment Incoherence The incoherence that results from holding onto resentments and unforgiving attitudes keeps you from being aligned with your true self. It can block you from your next level of quality life experience. Metaphorically, it's the curtain standing between the room you're living in now and a new room, much larger and full of beautiful objects. The act of forgiveness removes the curtain. Clearing up your old accounts can free up so much energy that you jump right into a whole new house. Forgiving releases you from the punishment of a self-made prison where you are both the inmate and the jailer. - Doc Childre and Howard Martin submitted by Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote What lies ahead of you and what lies behind you is insignificant compared to what lies within you. The thing that's so great about recovery today is that no matter where I am, I'm here. Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote What lies ahead of you and what lies behind you is insignificant compared to what lies within you. The thing that's so great about recovery today is that no matter where I am, I'm here. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Let It Begin With Me Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I reach out and touch. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote The meeting was at a church, there was a man standing at the door, he had a tie on and he was handsome. And I thought: 'He must be the minister, now he'll tell me to leave.' And he stuck out his hand and said, 'Welcome.' And I wasn't ready for that; the welcome I got from Alcoholics Anonymous. One drunk relating to another. - Sharon B.
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