Even More Recovery Readings and Meditations - May

[bluidkiti]

May 1

Step by Step

Today, not as an alcoholic working to avoid a relapse but as a soberholic embracing the addictive habit of recovery, I will laugh. I can now find the tragic irony of all I have wasted and lost only to be led to this point when I no longer have to drink - because sobriety has replaced my addiction to alcohol. I can laugh for the relief that I now think in terms of wanting sobriety more than fighting an urge or temptation to drink because, now, I don't need the drink or high. I can laugh at myself for realizing I have made my journey away from chronic intoxication so needlessly complicated because I overlooked a simple and basic truth: I want sobriety more than drinking. With that, I can work the steps with less fear, less hesitation, a higher self-esteem - and the hope and faith that my sobriety has progressed to where I need to be: in recovery. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M., 2016

**************************************************

~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

CONSCIOUS CONTACT

The task ahead of us is never as great as the Power behind us.

~ Anonymous ~

Step Eleven improves our conscious contact with God. We prepare ourselves for whatever is to come when we ask only to do the will of God. The more we practise this Step, the better we get at hearing what God is telling us. Our sixth sense of intuition becomes our main sense. We begin to intuitively know what to do.

We shouldn’t be surprised that we find ourselves in service. What better task is there for us than to carry the message? Step Eleven keys us into our Power. Step Twelve exercises that Power where it can do good. It is good to practice Step Eleven before we attempt to do anything, even get out of bed in the morning.

I focus on establishing contact with and turning my will over to my Higher Power before I attempt to do anything. Step Eleven opens my ears and my heart to what I am supposed to accomplish.

**************************************************

~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Our Lord has written the promise of resurrection, not in books alone but in every leaf of springtime.

~ Martin Luther ~

Springtime is a perfect metaphor for renewed life, recovery, and resurrection. All around us we see the buds of leaves and flowers bursting forth in celebration. Just like nature, we, too, experience our personal springtime of renewal. Our personal anniversaries are worthy of celebration, whether it be one day, one month, or many years of recovery.

Some people are shy about celebrating their days and years of recovery. Maybe they feel unworthy, or they don’t want to draw attention to themselves. But the true spirit of celebration is humility. It’s not be-cause we have worked so hard that we deserve it; it’s that we have been given the gift promised in the Twelve Steps. Because we submit to the grace of God, we celebrate the gift we have received.

Today I see the symbols of renewed life within me and all around.

**************************************************

~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

When I’m acting as if I’m the center of the universe, it’s helpful to he reminded that I’m just another bozo on the bus.

~ Rose Casey ~

Being just another bozo on the bus doesn’t mean that our lives lack importance. On the contrary, we are coming to believe that each of us is here by design and destined to make a unique contribution to the whole of humankind. We are also coming to understand that our participation in an unfolding situation does not affect its entire outcome, crucial though our part may be.

When we can fully understand the meaning of this truth, we will sense a freedom that we did not know before. In the past we tried to be the center of the universe. This meant being responsible for nearly every circumstance affecting almost everyone we knew. Through the program we are learning that being in charge of ourselves, and ourselves only, is a big enough job in itself. Freeing ourselves of the burden of making decisions for everyone we love will enhance our well-being. Let’s revel in our bozoness!

I am as free and as joyful as I want to be today. I am In charge of myself and my well-being.

**************************************************

~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I can manage my feelings of guilt

There were times when I felt so guilty that I (a) used chemicals just to forget the pain; (b) couldn’t be around people; (c) hurt myself and even thought of suicide. I considered myself a bad person and knew of no way to change.

I still think of using sometimes when I feel guilty. But I don’t−because in dual recovery I am taking three facts to heart: I have no-fault illnesses, I tend to be hard on myself, and I am a good person who deserves love and health. In recovery, I am learning that my feelings of guilt diminish when I work my program (for instance, by doing a Fourth Step and a Fifth Step) and stay honest doing a daily Tenth Step inventory. The relief, the peace, are worth it.

Today I will do an anonymous favour for someone.

*************************************************

~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Defeat is not the worst of failures.
Not to have tried is the worst failure.

~ George Edward Woodberry ~

Any new task, especially an important or difficult one, can cause anxiety. We can think of all sorts of reasons for not beginning a task, but the real reason is often fear of failure. We don’t want to look foolish or have people laugh at us, or look down on us because we didn’t do well.

The irony is that just the opposite is true. Most people admire someone who has tackled a major task, like learning a new language, or going back to school, or getting into an exercise program. Trying new things takes a certain amount of courage, and most people respect those who at least try.

Getting sober, arresting an addiction, is probably one of the most difficult tasks anyone can do. Sometimes, as we are working on recovery and wondering how on earth we can gain and maintain our program, we forget we are not alone. It’s normal to have a certain amount of doubt and anxiety, but that is not a reason to quit trying. We can be assured that the doubt and anxiety fades as, in time, we come to accept our powerlessness and the help of our Higher Power. With the grace of God, we are not alone.

Today help me take a risk and not be afraid of failure.

**************************************************

~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.

~ Step Five ~

A prayer is a humble and heartfelt communication with a power greater than yourself. A prayer can admit a weakness, communicate a need, or convey praise and gratitude. Prayers can unburden your heart, give you strength and courage, and deepen your faith and trust in a Higher Power. Use the following prayer as you work on your understanding and acceptance of Step Five.

Step Five Prayer

Higher Power, I have undertaken a searching and fearless moral inventory. I have learned much about myself, and I have come face to face with the effects of my addiction.

Higher Power, thank you for the strength you have given me so I could accomplish this task. Your guidance has helped me see the wrongs I have committed. I now understand what is right.

I ask for your forgiveness for the harm I have done. I pray that you will look upon me with kindness and mercy. With your help, I can admit—with complete honesty and respect—the exact nature of my wrongdoings to you and to someone I trust. I humbly ask for your guiding light to show me the path ahead. Through your guidance, I will make progress in my recovery. Higher Power, thank you for listening to my prayer.

**************************************************

~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

The first sight of the lighthouse set boldly on its outer rock, the flash of a gull, the waiting procession of seaward-bound firs on an island, made me feel solid and definite again, instead of a poor, incoherent being . . . It was a return to happiness.

~ Sarah Orne Jewett ~

Many of us have things that calm us, center us, bring us inner peace. For some it is the ocean, with its smells, sounds, rhythm, vastness. For others it is a spectacular sunset, where luminous colors spark each surrounding cloud into an ethereal hue. Still others may have a song that gives peace and comfort.

These are our positive relaxation "fixes.” When we have been away from the ocean for a while, we have an urge to go again. Just seeing the ocean is reassuring and soothing, as is the sunset or song we seek for comfort.

Our ability to recall is a wonderful gift. By closing our eyes we can see relaxation, hear it, touch it. We can create it clearly in our minds. A few minutes of such meditation can do hours of good.

What relaxes me and makes me feel good? Tonight I will think about that pleasant thought and feel the peace and contentment it gives me.

**************************************************

~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Loving ourselves

Our fellowship tells us to take care of our-selves first. It tells us that life and our Twelve Step program come before anyone or any-thing else. But what if we get too self-centered about this? Taking care of ourselves does not mean being selfish or maliciously hurting others to meet our own needs. What it means is that we learn to love and mature ourselves, because we are important. We are truly closest to ourselves, if we don’t love ourselves, who will?

The famous psychologist Erich Fromm says that if people can love productively, then they can also love themselves; if they can love only others, then they cannot love at all. This means that, to be able to love others, we need the capacity to love and care for ourselves.

Am I learning to love myself?

Higher Power, help me to love myself so that I may better love you and others.

Today I will work on how I feel about myself by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

**************************************************

~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Always do one thing less than you think you can do.

~ BERNARD BARUCH ~

Newcomer

In my first few months of recovery, I gave most of my attention to this program. Since becoming able to function better, I’ve taken on more responsibilities in my work life. I’m trying to do what I can to clear up debts and make some financial progress. But I’m overwhelmed with all my responsibilities, and I feel tired much of the time.

Sponsor

I identify with your desire to try to make up for lost time. When I first entered recovery, I felt exhausted just thinking about how much I had to make up for and how little time there was to accomplish everything. It didn’t occur to me that relaxation and creativity were equally as important and that, in fact, they were necessities of life.

You may need to reassess the responsibilities you’ve taken on. This is a good time for you to think about which of your responsibilities are essential, and which give you genuine pleasure. You may find that you can drop some activities to make time for others that lift your spirits instead of draining them. We didn’t enter recovery to make ourselves miserable. Joy is not only possible; it’s a requirement!

Today, I honor my need for joy.

**************************************************

~ THE EYE OPENER ~

The aim of AA is not Sobriety but Happy Sobriety. The most effective and incidentally the soberest group, is the happiest group. It is possible that you can’t speak at meetings, maybe you are not in a position to “carry the message,” but you can and should show your happy sobriety in the radiance of your smile. It is our only advertisement and it should outshine in brilliance the gaudiest of neon signs.

The poor guy still in the gutter isn’t interested in your sobriety, he’s interested in the price of another drink. He is, however, very much interested in happiness. It’s what he has been looking for all his life and thought he could buy by the “fifth.”

**************************************************

~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

RESENT SOMEBODY

The moment you start to resent a person you become that person’s slave. He or she controls your dreams, absorbs your digestion, robs you of your peace of mind and good will, and takes away the pleasure of your work.

A person you resent ruins your spirituality and nullifies your prayers. You cannot take a vacation without the person going along! He or she destroys your freedom of mind and hounds you wherever you go. There is no way to escape the person you resent.

That person is with you when you are awake and invades your privacy when you sleep. That person is close beside you when you eat, when you drive your car, and when you are on the job.

You can never have efficiency or happiness. The person you resent influences even the tone of your voice. He or she requires you to take medicine for indigestion, headaches, and loss of energy. That person even steals your last moment of consciousness before you go to sleep.

So if you want to be a slave, harbour your resentments.

*************************************************

~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

DEALING WITH DISHARMONY

It hath been said, Whosoever shall put away his wife, let him give her a miting of divorcement:

But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery (Matthew 5:31-32)

We are told that in those days divorces were granted by the rabbinical law on most trifling grounds. Married people who were not getting on togeather as well as they would have liked, were prone to run away from the problem by obtaining an easy dissolution. Now we understand that no permanent happiness can be obtained in this way. As long as you are running away from your problem, you will continue to meet in a new guise at every turn in the road.

Just as in running from one business position to another, without first having brought about a change in consciousness, we find ourselves but repeating the old conditions in a slightly different form, so, as a rule, people who divorce freely are apt to finish up as dissatisfied as they began. The general role in Truth is, fight out your problem where you are, with prayer.

The general rule is still good for all conditions in life: Do not try to divorce or amputate the inharmony, but let it dissolve away of itself under God’s guidance.

**************************************************

~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Treasured Wounds

The only appropriate response to your brother is gratitude.

~ A Course in Miracles ~

Charles Dickens' character Miss Havisham was jilted by her fiance. As a lifelong reminder of the pain he caused her by leaving her at the altar, Miss Havisham keeps the wedding feast on her banquet table, just as it was. Although it has become stale and moldy, she regularly looks upon it with regret and resentment.

If we have an investment in not forgiving someone, we carry a "treasured wound” that reminds us of the injustice done to us. This wound might be an actual physical injury, pain, or illness; an article symbolic of our relationship; a photo; a piece of jewelry; a letter; or another person who connects us to the person. In all of these cases, we harbor one purpose: to keep the pain alive as we focus on the feeling that we have been victimized.

From the standpoint of the Spirit within us that loves to be free and happy, treasured wounds make no sense whatsoever. The voice of fear urges us to hold on to any memory or symbol that proves we were dishonored. The voice of love, on the other hand, holds on to any mementos of the love and blessings a relationship brought us.

Are you keeping any moldy wedding feasts on your banquet table? You may not be holding on to a literally stale meal, but perhaps you are still getting mileage out of an old hurt. Perhaps you have told the same story a hundred times, believing you gain justification by framing yourself as a victim. But with every shovelful of resentment we cast at another, we dig our own grave. We only lose when we cling to treasured wounds.

Instead, let us treasure the blessings we have gained. A Course in Miracles reminds us that “all that is left of your past is a blessing.” Let us clear the dead banquet from the table and invite someone wonderful for a new feast.

Help me find blessings and release any pain I have held onto through unforgiveness.

I release the past to make way for a brighter future.

© Alan Cohen 1996, 2010

[bluidkiti]

May 2

Step by Step

Today, if I have made sincere amends to those I wronged "except when to do so would hurt" them, I must progress beyond regret, shame and anger to what may be my single strongest and most meaningful amend: committing myself to sobriety and recovery. For all I might have said or done as an alcoholic and now sober, I cannot become the proverbial doormat and let anyone or anything hammer me for the mistakes I have tried to correct, especially by those who cannot or will not accept my apologies. I can allow a margin of regret that I may not be forgiven by all I have hurt, but I cannot afford to be kicked down repeatedly. Today, if I have been rebuffed or cannot make amends because doing so might lead to more damage, I can find reconciliation in being sober. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M.

**************************************************

~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

FRIENDSHIP

Friendship of a kind that cannot easily be reversed tomorrow must have its roots in common interests and shared belief.

~ Barbara W. Tuchman ~

We find the meaning of friendship in our Fellowship. We no longer take hostages or allow ourselves to be hostages. We give and take freely in a spirit of good-natured affection. The friendship we find in our Program is one where hidden agendas are left at the door. We relate to one another as human beings and fellow travelers. We leave sharp jealous attitudes in our old life, where they belong.

We are careful to honor each individual. We remember that every person we meet has something to teach us. When we extend our hand to a person who is still suffering, we do not forget that it wasn’t so long ago someone extended a hand to us.

I find myself able to become friends with individuals I disliked at one time. They may not have changed, but I most certainly have. The world in general has become a much friendlier place.

**************************************************

~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

If you come to a fork in the road, take it.

~ Yogi Berra ~

The humor in this quotation points to some deeper wisdom. The fact is, we all come to forks in the road of life, and we have to choose which way to go. Sometimes we cannot see a clear best choice. Sometimes we know what the best choice would be, but we cannot face the losses or the pain it would entail. Many of us have stopped at the fork in the road and just sat there for a long, long time, refusing to take either way.

The healthy, creative, constructive life requires some risk taking. Even when we are not sure which is the best way to go, it may be better to try one of them than to just stay stuck. Certainly it is wise to stop, consider our choices, and not be too hasty or impulsive. But after we think and weigh the options, making a choice will lead to new information, which will then influence our next choices. That is how we follow a creative and lively path for ourselves.

Today I will remember that some risk taking is healthy.

**************************************************

~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

One of the many blessings or opportunities my recovery gives me is the realization that there is a bus out of the old neighborhood.

~ Elizabeth Farrell ~

Today we have many opportunities to chart a new course in our behavior. We don’t have to keep feeling inadequate or anxious. We can decide to change how we act toward other people and how we respond to the unexpected. It’s our choice.

There is great hope and promise in knowing how personally responsible we are for our actions and, thus, our successes. There is even greater hope in knowing that we can feel as peaceful as we make up our minds to feel. With our Higher Power’s help, we are in charge of the way we see the events in our lives. And with that help we are in charge of how we maneuver through the moments of every day. What lucky women we are! Never again will we be at the mercy of our obsessive feelings. And never again will life be any more difficult than we decide to let it be. With the help of each other, our Higher Power, and our willingness to change, we will know a new freedom.

I can hop on the bus of change at any stop throughout the day. And it’s a free ride to serenity!

**************************************************

~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I know I have a problem with alcohol

I could accept the fact that I had a psychiatric illness and I was able to manage it (I took my medication as prescribed). But I didn’t agree I had an addiction. When I drank, I usually had just one, because I thought I knew my limit. Alcohol seemed to affect me little. I wanted people to just leave me alone about this.

But once I thought about it, I realized it had become harder to stop at “just one.” Then it became harder to stop at two−especially the nights I got drunk. I was feeling more tense and irritable, and I found myself thinking about drinking more and more. Fortunately, my doctor suggested that alcohol was probably affecting me more than I realized. I’m glad I listened to her and got help before my addiction progressed further.

I will call my doctor, therapist, or sponsor when I still have doubts about drinking.

*************************************************

~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

It was the turtle who won the race, you know.

~ Jessica S. ~

In early recovery, we can get so excited about change that we want to change everything in our lives, often radically, and we want to do it right now.

That impulse can be self-defeating. It took a long time, sometimes years, to progress in addiction; it will take time to make progress in recovery, too. We need to look for small, slow changes rather than big, dramatic ones. And if we look closely we can already see results.

Are we sleeping better? Feeling physically stronger? Have we gotten medical care, if we needed it? Has our nervous system settled down? Are we feeling less jangled, more calm? Are we able to concentrate better? Have we lessened our fear and anxiety? Do we feel more at home in the world? Have we found a Higher Power to share our lives? Do we feel a kinship with other people? Do we feel more serene in our relationships?

If the answer to any of these is “yes,” we’ve already made measurable progress in our recovery. The rest will come with time. As the tortoise showed us, slow and easy wins the race.

Today help me to rejoice in small victories. Let me be satisfied with small successes.

**************************************************

~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

When the way comes to an end, then change—having changed, you pass through.

~ I Ching ~

A Zen parable relates the story of a young monk who enters the monastery. Eager to begin his new life so he can attain spiritual fulfillment, he asks the head monk to provide him with some guidance. The head monk asks, “Have you eaten your breakfast?” “Yes, I have,” the young monk replies, to which the head monk says, “Then go wash your bowl.”

Fulfillment can be thought of as the outcome of executing something in a way that brings closure to it. With such fulfillment comes a sense of achievement that helps build self-confidence and facilitate change.

When the young monk is told to eat breakfast and wash his bowl, he leams that spiritual fulfillment is something that will not be attained immediately or may never even reach a point of completion. Fulfillment is ongoing and something he must tend to each day. Your recovery can be seen in much the same way. One form of fulfillment comes when you have reached the end of a day in which you have remained free from your habit. Another comes when you do the work required in the Steps.

Each morning I renew my energy and seek fulfillment through the program, then reflect upon my accomplishments at the end of the day.

**************************************************

~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Weigh thy words in a balance, and make a door and bar for thy mouth.

~ Old Testament Apocrypha ~

What we say can hurt or heal. We may look back at times and wish we hadn't said something to someone. Perhaps we can see the hurt we caused by harsh or insulting words. We may be able to recall a snide or impatient comment delivered to an unsuspecting stranger or friend. Words can be powerful weapons.

By the same token, we may be able to recall when someone said, "Thanks, I really liked what you said to me. It helped." We may have made someone laugh or smile despite tears, or we may have been able to point out a different viewpoint to someone blinded by rage or impatience. Words can be powerful healers.

Freedom of speech doesn't mean we can say anything we want whenever we want. Communication is an action that requires responsibility. Abuse of speech can lead to angry confrontations, severed relationships, and isolation. The responsible use of our gift of speech can lead to healthy relationships and positive emotions. We can listen to ourselves and learn whether our voice helps or hurts.

My words can hurt or heal. Which will I choose?

**************************************************

~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Helping others

We have been given so much help in our ad-diction through countless other people who have searched for a solution. If others hadn’t searched and found, who would have been there to offer us a helping hand? The ones who come after us can help us best by letting us help them.

Newcomers are a constant reminder and source of joy to us. We’re on this path together, and we should never forget to be grateful for our fellow addicts.

Do I help others?

Higher Power, help me always to be grateful to the ones who have helped me, and help me offer my hand to others.

Today I will help my fellow addicts by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

**************************************************

~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

One never notices what has been done; one can only see what remains to be done.

~ MARIE CURIE ~

Newcomer

You seem so tolerant, so easygoing. You’re always telling me to relax. Shouldn’t you be tougher on me?

Sponsor

Why are we so hard on ourselves, so impatient, so dissatisfied with the ongoing miracle of our recovery?

In our hearts, we don’t believe in the effectiveness of going through a gradual process over time; that’s not how we learned to do things in our lives of active addiction. Consuming an addictive substance or acting out a compulsion had an almost instantaneous effect. We grew accustomed to making things happen that fast, and today we may think that if things take time, we’re somehow defective. Perhaps we’ve had little experience of practicing something on a regular basis, without forcing results. Work and effort; gentleness, relaxation, rest—all these are necessary parts of the same process.

Today, I’m satisfied with who I am, what I have, what I do.

**************************************************

~ THE EYE OPENER ~

The United Nations and the old League of Nations both recognized the fact that man’s conquest of time and space has brought the nations of the earth into such close and intimate relationship that national problems are now world problems and must be dealt with accordingly.

Their lack of success, up to the present time, stems from their inability to recognize the common Fatherhood of God and the inherent brotherhood of man. They attempt to settle world affairs without consulting the Power that made both the world and the men in it.

**************************************************

~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

LIVING THE WAY WE PRAY

I knelt to pray when day was done
And prayed: “O Lord, bless everyone,
And lift from each heart the pain,
And let the sick be well again.”

And then the next day when I did awake,
I carelessly went on my way.
The whole day long I did not try
To wipe a tear from my eye.

I did not try to share the load
Of any Brother on the road.
I did not even go to see
The sick man just next door to me.

Yet once again when day was done
I prayed: “O Lord, bless everyone.”
But as I prayed, to my ear
There came a voice that whispered clear:

“Pause, hypocrite, before you pray:
Whom have you tried to bless today?
God’s sweetest blessings always go
By hands that serve Him here below.”

*************************************************

~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

DISCIPLINED SPEECH

Read Matthew 5:33−37

Again, ye have heard that it hath been said by them of old time, Thou shall not forswear thyself, but shalt perform unto the Lord thine oaths:

But let your communication be, Yea, yea; Nay, nay: for whatsoever is more than these cometh of evil (Matthew 5:33, 5:37).

Swear not at all, is one of the cardinal points of the teaching of Jesus. It means, briefly, that you are not to mortgage your future conduct in advance; to seek to fix your conduct or your belief for tomorrow while it is yet today. Rather you are constantly to keep yourself an open channel for the pouring out of the Holy Spirit into manifestation through you.

Of course, Jesus does not mean that you are not to enter into ordinary business engagements. Nor does he mean that the only ordinary oath administered in a court of law is inadmissible. These things a are matters of legal convenience. The Sermon on the Mount is a treatise on the spiritual life, for the spiritual life controls all the rest.

**************************************************

~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Lord of Your Kingdom

Make your life a mission, not an intermission.

~ Arnold Glasgow ~

One of my favorite literary characters is the beloved Don Quixote, Man of La Mancha, brought to life by Miguel de Cervantes. Through worldly eyes, Don Quixote appears to be a foolish itinerant, but his spiritual vision reveals him to be a knight on a mission to bring truth, love, and purity to a dismal world. He vanquishes a windmill he fancies to be a fire-breathing dragon; he ceremoniously dons an old brass shaving bowl as "The Golden Helmet of Umbrino”; when he meets the town harlot, Aldonza, he gives her his handkerchief and humbly adores her as Dulcinea, “The Sweet One.” Aldonza laughs in his face and jabs, “I am no Dulcinea, you fool—I am a ****!”

Don Quixote objects, “No, my lady, you mustn't speak that way about yourself; you are my lady Dulcinea, and I your knight, the Lord of La Mancha.”

Like many visionaries, Don Quixote poses a threat to those who believe in worldly power, and his foes devise a plot to break him of his delusions. They capture him in a room of mirrors and convince him that he is not a knight, but a fool. They succeed in breaking his spirit, and he becomes ill and despondent.

In the final scene of the play, Don Quixote lies weakly in a dungeon after he has been convicted of heresy and sentenced to death. There Aldonza and Don Quixote’s sidekick, Sancho, visit him and try to remind him of his quest. “I know of no quest,” he retorts sharply.

Aldonza takes his hand and kisses it. “Don’t you remember?” she asks. “You are the Lord of La Mancha, and I your Lady Dulcinea!”

A light begins to gleam in Don Quizote’s eyes, and soon he reclaims his quest. “Sancho, get my armor!” he commands, and sings the classic song, The Impossible Dream. As the guards call Don Quixote to his execution, it is clear that although they may annihilate his body, his spirit has triumphed.

Give me the strength to believe in my quest and live it.

My visions are given to me by God. I will live my dreams.

Alan Cohen 1996, 2010

[bluidkiti]

May 3

Step by Step

Today, security in sobriety to sustain any disappointments - minor and major - that I encounter in recovery. The best laid plans of mice and men do not always take form even in sobriety, and I must not deceive myself by expecting life to go as I think or expect it should only because I have stopped drinking. Part of the nature of alcoholism is the ultra-sensitivity to disappointment, sometimes to a disproportionate degree, and the result could be the false belief that I have failed somewhere along the line. Life for the non-addict is not always a bed of roses, but the thorns can cut the recovering addict's psyche deeper. Today, mindful that even the rose bed of sobriety has hidden thorns, I will not be disenchanted if I am stung. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M.

**************************************************

~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

CHANGING ATTITUDES

The Program is education without graduation.

~ Anonymous ~

We can never escape from reality. We must adapt to the real world no matter how different and difficult it seems. We can’t change the facts of life, but we can change our attitudes toward them. That’s the purpose of the Program, which we learn to cope without returning to the false courage and comfort of our addiction.

Stress and pressure are enemies of serenity. When they threaten to overcome us, we remember that they have been trying to make mankind escape into chemicals for ages. The healthy attitude we work for doesn’t believe that stress and pressure come our way because “life isn’t fair.” It’s important to our recovery that we remember, “We don’t have attitudes; they have us.”

I’m learning new attitudes towards old problems, and new solutions for them, by working my program. I am learning to live in the real world.

**************************************************

~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

When you have got an elephant by the hind leg and he is trying to run away, it’s best to let him run.

~ Abraham Lincoln ~

We know what it feels like to have an elephant by the hind leg when he wants to run. We have held on to our addictive and codependent ways, thinking we were in control and refusing to face the reality that we were about to get trampled. Now we can be grateful for the guidance of Step One. When we could admit we were not in control, that changed everything.

Some of us knew we were out of control but didn’t know where to go from there. We were living in despair, but with no place to turn. Steps One and Two pointed the way to a spiritual release. We were told that if we “let the elephant go,” we could get help from a Higher Power. This new way of thinking gave us a whole different take on our life. We can let go and we will survive.

Today I am grateful for the life-changing option of letting go.

**************************************************

~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Sometimes the things that frighten you the most can turn out to be the biggest sources of strength.

~ Iris Timberlake ~

Not many things would send fear through us if we remembered to rely on our Higher Power at all limes. Yet we try to handle circumstances ourselves first. It’s often only when we finally feel hopeless I hat we turn to our Higher Power for the help that awaited us all along.

We make our lives much more difficult than they need to be. Let’s quit thinking through our problems alone, no matter how foolish they seem. Let’s quit trying to handle tough people alone. Let’s trust that every circumstance, no matter how small, is a lesson offered by God. And let’s know that the outcome will be the right one for our particular growth at that moment.

Things that frighten us do so only because we have failed to remember the presence of our Higher Power. Let’s pray for the willingness to remember God’s presence. When we do, we will know a new strength.

Today I will let God help me handle every moment of my day.

**************************************************

~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I have much to offer

Deep down I used to think of myself as a sick and defective person in a life that could not be changed. I thought I was someone who could not take responsibility, who could not hold a job, who just kept making the same mistakes, as if she didn’t know better.

Getting a hold on my dual disorder has been a struggle, but after some months now in recovery, I feel stronger, resilient, even courageous. With my abstinence and stability I can see that I do not have to be limited by my problems: I am not just a person with a dual disorder. I have abilities and I am learning how to put them to use as I heal. These days I sense that I can do whatever is needed, not just to take care of myself, but to flourish.

Today I will make a list of my strength, my assets.

*************************************************

~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Ah, what is more blessed than to put cares away!

~ Catullus ~

There’s nothing like a good hearty laugh to pick up a gloomy day. Laughter has such a calming effect on us, doctors ought to prescribe it: “Take two jokes, and call me in the morning.” Laughter liberates the tormented soul and soothes the troubled heart. Laughter helps us keep perspective; our troubles are less scary, our woes are dimmer, life is less frightening.

No two of us laugh at the same thing; our sense of humor is as unique as our fingerprints. It doesn’t matter what we laugh at — life’s silly moments, our own mistakes, or the circus clown falling on a banana peel — we’re always richer just for doing it.

Laughter works on our bodies like stationary exercise, banishing tension and bad thoughts as it loosens the muscles and soothes the mind. A good laugh leaves a happy aftertaste that lingers on and helps us fend off the ghouls and goblins and things that go bump in the night. Laughter is song, it’s joy, it’s life itself.

Today help me bring the gift of laughter to another, and help me find more laughter in my own life.

**************************************************

~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

People have a hard time letting go of their suffering. Out of a fear of the unknown, they prefer suffering that is familiar.

~ Thick Nhat Hanh ~

Each time you engaged in your habit, a link on a chain was created. Over time, more and more links were added until the chain that bound you to the habit was strong and it prevented you from moving about freely. It imprisoned and enslaved you.

The process of letting go in recovery is one in which you remove, one by one, each link in the chain of your addiction. If you came into the program knowing your decision to be free from your habit was the right one, you started your recovery with a deep determination and conscious commitment. And you have discovered that, by letting go and letting both your Higher Power and the program work through you, you have kept your focus strong. You have been able to slowly break free from this chain.

But if you entered the program kicking and screaming or thought of your recovery as something you would do to prove that you could take a break from your habit, then you may be finding it harder to break free. Until you completely surrender your will and let go, you are still enslaved by your habit.

I will let go and completely surrender. Through this action, I will find greater freedom.

**************************************************

~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Go ahead with your life, your plans, your preparation, as fully as you can. Don't waste time by stopping before the interruptions have started.

~ Richard L. Evans ~

Inside each of us is a little voice called "Too Cautious." Too Cautious loves to be the initiator of doom, the forerunner of disaster, the messenger of disappointment. When we start to plan our vacations, for example, Too Cautious will tell us we don’t have enough money, or we probably won’t get a reservation, or we've got too many other things to do. lf we think about going back to school, Too Cautious will tell us we won’t have enough time or we'll probably flunk. If we want to ask a friend to do something with us, Too Cautious will whisper in our ears that we aren’t likable and will probably get refused.

But we don't have to listen to Too Cautious. We can listen instead to our Higher Power. We'll soon hear inspiring words of faith that will help us take more risks, like "Why not?" or "Wouldn't that be nice?" or "What a wonderful idea." We can listen to our Higher Power for strength, hope, and guidance in all our affairs.

What's stopping me from making plans or taking a risk?

**************************************************

~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Losing our self-centeredness

The Fourth Step inventory helps us see our character defects. When we take a look at why we resented others, for example, our self-centeredness jumps out at us. In the past we set up situations that helped only our-selves. Then, when things didn’t go our way, we quickly became resentful of people (or places or things).

That kind of self-centeredness is what nearly killed us, but we persisted nevertheless. If we use that same persistence in finding and working on our character defects, our self-centeredness will diminish and make way for the growth promised in the Ninth Step prayer.

Am I using my self-centeredness?

Higher Power, help me find and work on my character defects, especially my self-centeredness.

Today I will work on my self-centeredness by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

**************************************************

~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

If you obey all the rules, you miss all the fun.

~ KATHARINE HEPBURN ~

Newcomer

I went to a wedding where it seemed as if everyone but me was celebrating in ways I used to love—overeating and getting drunk, among other things. Either they were consuming stuff right under my nose, or else they were talking about all their little addictive habits without questioning them, as if they hadn’t a care in the world.

Sponsor

First, let me congratulate you for getting through a demanding social event without picking up. We go through a process in recovery that begins with feelings of loss and deprivation and progresses to a sense of freedom. It takes awhile.

In early recovery, I envied and resented nonaddicts. Everywhere I looked, people seemed to be bingeing in one way or another without negative consequences. It took time to accept that the things they could do without negative consequences—or believed they could do—were toxic for me. As my denial lifted, my attitude toward recovery became somewhat egotistical. For some time, I lived off a sense of superiority. They were in the dark, I thought. They were the ones who were deprived; I’d found a better way.

Over time, we stop being so concerned about others’ lives. What other people do for fun is their business; we have our own path. It doesn’t make us better or worse than anyone else, but it does make us different.

Today, I love being alive; I celebrate my recovery.

**************************************************

~ THE EYE OPENER ~

George Washington is often credited with being America’s first millionaire, yet few people are aware of this fact. He left a heritage so much richer politically, economically, and historically, that his own personal wealth is forgotten.

His personal wealth has long since been dissipated but the opportunities in this country he helped establish, will continue as long as men’s lives are motivated by the same unselfish devotion to mankind that he exemplified, both in public and private life.

**************************************************

~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

LOVE IS

Love is friendship that has caught fire. It is quiet understanding, mutual confidence, sharing, and forgiving. It is loyalty through good times and bad. It settles for less than perfection and makes allowances for human weaknesses.

Love is content with the present, it hopes for the future, and it doesn’t brood over the past. It’s the day-in-and-day-out chronicle of irritations, problems, compromises, small disappointments, big victories, and common goals.

If you have love in your life, it can make up for a great many things you lack. If you don’t have it, no matter what else there is it’s not enough.

*************************************************

~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

RESIST NOT EVIL

Read Matthew 5:38−42.

But I say unto you, That ye resist not evil . . . (Matthew 5:39)

Jesus is a revolutionary teacher. He turns the world upside down for those who accept his teaching. When once you have accepted the Jesus Christ message, all value change radically.

The old law was that whatever man did to man, he should himself be made to suffer by way of punishment. If he put out another man’s eye, his own was put out by the officers of justice; if he killed, he was killed.

The desire to “get even,” to get one’s own back, to level things up somehow or other, when we have been hurt or have suffered injustice, or witnessed things of which we did not approve, will remain with us until the time when we definitely take ourselves in hand and destroy it. “Revenge,” said Bacon. “is a kind of wild justice.”

Now Jesus reverses this and says that when someone injures you, you are to forgive him. No matter what the provocation may be, and no matter how many times it is repeated, you are to loose him and let him go, for thus only can you be freed yourself.

**************************************************

~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

First-Class Flying

Above all things, reverence yourself.

~ Pythagoras ~

The movie Defending Your Life suggests that when we leave this world we review the experiences in which we succumbed to fear rather than choosing love. As Daniel reviews his life, he realizes that he consistently denied his own good, until the following event: After a devastating divorce, Daniel was left with a small amount of money and an airline ticket for a vacation in the Orient. When Daniel arrived at the ticket counter for his pleasure outing, the agent told him, “You have seat 38B.”

“Does that mean I’ll be sitting in the back of the plane between two other people for ten hours?” he asked.

“I’m sorry, sir, there are no other seats available.”

“How about in first class?”

“There is one first-class seat left; to upgrade will cost an additional $3,000.”

Daniel deliberated for a moment, then exclaimed, “I’ll take it!”

Do you love yourself enough to give yourself what would make you happy? Can you trust that your happiness will not take away from another's good, but will only add to the sum total of joy in the universe?

Asking for what you want is not selfish; it is your responsibility. The more you honor yourself with beauty, play, and joy, the greater will be your capacity to love and serve others.

I open myself to receive all the gifts You would offer me.

I accept the best that life has to offer.

[bluidkiti]

May 4

Step by Step

"Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him." - Step Three

Today, have I surrendered my will and life to a higher power after having "made a decision ..." We are warned, "Selfishness - self-centeredness! That ...is the root of our troubles." Selfishness, easily identified in our Fourth Step, gives way to humility - the total surrender of self to the will of a higher power. The Third Step lays the foundation for the spiritual change that we work toward in subsequent steps, and change can be little or nothing if we do not first experience the humility of absolute surrender. And the predictable outcome if we hold onto our playing God with our own lives will be a slip or full relapse. How do I "take" my Third? "... (I)t is better to meet God alone than with one" other person, according to the Big Book because of the intensely personal and private relationship we have with the God of our understanding. Today, I do not take for granted the immense importance of Step Three and ask if I have humbled myself completely to seek my higher power's will instead of mine. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M.

**************************************************

~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

WINNING ATTITUDE

If I should lose, let me stand by the road and cheer as the winners go by.

~ Berton Bradley ~

If we are to be among the winners in the recovery from addiction and obsession, we must maintain the attitude of success. Winners in any 12 Step Program take fearless inventories, correct shortcomings, and willingly make amends. By taking charge of ourselves in this manner, we neither blame or credit others or events. With confidence and willingness, we hold ourselves responsible for our lives.

We take responsibility for our pre-Program faults and conduct. We can then count ourselves among those who, with the help of our Higher Power, can control compulsive and excessive behaviour. But we don’t do it with pride. We do it with humility and gratitude.

I will begin to lose hold of a winning attitude if I choose to leave spiritual growth to chance. I must make life happen, not let it happen to me.

**************************************************

~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Working so hard for the rewards we want, we miss the gifts, already present, that God wants to give us.

~ Anonymous ~

We cannot win many of the good things in life; we can only receive them. It is like falling asleep. No one can will himself to sleep. If we could, there would be no such thing as a sleepless night. The harder we try, the more awake we become. We can only allow ourselves to fall asleep. We cannot create a sunny day or a beautiful sight in nature, but we can block them from our awareness. We cannot fall in love by force of will, but we can prevent it from happening by our willfulness or busy habits. Our raging appetites and anxious state of mind can drive us willy-nilly in search of satisfaction—while more profound gifts are already in our hands.

Many valuable gifts are available only if we stay open to receive them. A wise man grows past our society’s mainstream idea that anything worth having requires hard work. The ultimate truth is that God’s grace provides what we need. Our work is in learning how to let go and be receptive.

Today I will open myself to the gifts already in my hands.

**************************************************

~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

To hear how special and wonderful we are is endlessly enthralling.

~ Gail Sheehy ~

Sometimes we give in to others because we want affirmation. Belonging, however we define it, is important, and letting our own values slip often seems worth it. But there’s a downside to this acquiescence. When we relinquish our integrity, we deny our very selves. And then we doubt our worth.

For many of us, knowing we are special has to be learned. Our families may not have conveyed this much-deserved message, so getting it somewhere was superior to getting it nowhere. But now we have the opportunity to seek affirmation from all the right sources.

Coming to believe that our Higher Power considers us wonderful just as we are requires that we dispel our more critical, though comfortable, self- assessment. This is the first step in finding the acceptance we’ve always longed for.

I will remind myself that God makes no junk each time I doubt my value to those around me.

**************************************************

~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I didn’t cause them and I can’t cure them

I used to feel frustrated and disappointed with myself after having symptoms of my psychiatric disorder. Sometimes I got drunk to take the edge off the symptoms. But when I woke up with a hangover, I felt guilty and ashamed. I felt as though I had had given up some control.

I still experience some of these feelings at times, but since I stopped drinking, my life feels more manageable. Learning about my dual disorder has also helped. While these two biological illnesses are not my fault, I am responsible for dealing with them: (a) I need to stay clean and sober; (b) I need to take my medication as prescribed by my psychiatrist; and (c) I need to attend a support group for my psychiatric issues and a Twelve Step group for my addiction. If I do these things, I will be taking good care of myself in dual recovery.

Today I will ask my higher power for self-acceptance and my psychiatrist for information about my illnesses.

*************************************************

~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

There is no end to the width of God’s shoulders.

~ Bob Blaire ~

There is a story about a wise woman listening to the woes of a friend. The friend sadly reported her problems on the road to recovery and how stuck she usually felt. After an hour of listening to negativity, the wise woman said, “Remember, God hasn’t quit His job.”

When we tackle all of life’s problems by ourselves, we quickly tire and get frustrated. We can usually measure our level of trust in our Higher Power by our physical and emotional condition. The more trouble we try to carry and fix ourselves, the more exhausted and frustrated we feel.

It is difficult to learn to trust Him enough to let Him help carry the load. But when we finally let go and turn over a problem, the clouds seem to open and the sun of hope shines on us again. And though it’s not something we learn to do all at once, in time we can see our slow and steady progress and feel our growing serenity and confidence.

Today let me trust my Higher Tower enough to share my burden. Let me turn one thing over.

**************************************************

~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

One sits uncomfortably on a too comfortable cushion.

~ Lillian Heilman ~

After a long period of spring rain that keeps you indoors, you yearn for sunshine and fresh air, to be doing something other than sitting around the house. You want change. After several hours spent in front of the computer or the television, you are eager to do something different. You want change. After eating the same leftovers for three days, you want to eat something different. You want change.

Staying in one place for too long deprives you of challenges and new adventures. Change provides welcome relief from monotony. But add too much change, and you can become overwhelmed. That is why it is important to seek a balance in the changes you are making.

With balance, you can experience both times of monotony as well as times of challenge and activity. What you change and when you change is within your control. To ensure balance, remember that change is not accomplished in one day, but over an extended period of time. Consider ways in which you can devote time to making changes and times when you take a break so you can start anew. Welcome the changes you need to make and remember that without them, your life would be stagnant.

I welcome change but do not let it overrun my life.

**************************************************

~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

My father taught me that a bill is like a crying baby and must be attended to at once.

~ Anne Morrow Lindbergh ~

In the past, we may have faced our bills with denial or justification that we needed the things we had purchased. We may have abused credit cards so much that we are still paying for items we purchased months or years ago. And we may have problems today with spending more than we earn.

Many times material wants are based on emotional needs we don’t know how to satisfy. In the past we may have thought we could ease our pains and troubles by buying new clothes or a bigger stereo. Our emotional needs are still screaming for attention and it may be difficult to stop using material purchases as pacifiers.

Like the recovering alcoholic who avoids a drink, we must disregard temptations of credit cards, extravagant purchases, and borrowing. Material things provide only a temporary reprieve, they will not take away our emotions. Emotions can only be eased by things money can’t buy: time, love, faith, and understanding.

I don't need to buy anything to take away my feelings. I can attend to my feelings with the tools of the program.

**************************************************

~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Expressing love

Now that we’ve hit bottom and are starting over, clean and sober, we can finally see that without a Higher Power, without love, we are powerless. It’s what we’ve been seeking for ages—and it’s been here all along; we just couldn’t see it. We need a Higher Power. We need love.

It is the answer to our problems; it can change everything. (But we have so much trouble with it!) We’re afraid of love, and we fail to give the love we have to give. Yet every expression of love is sacred, nurturing.

Am I expressing my love?

Higher Power, help me to see my best self, to express it, and to see the best in others.

I will express the love within me today by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

**************************************************

~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Nobuddy ever fergits where he buried a hatchet.

~ KIN HUBBARD ~

Newcomer

There’s someone close to me who was always after me to quit my addictive behavior. Now that I’m in recovery, he’s angry at me all the time. Is this what I deserve for recovering?

Sponsor

The people who were in our lives when we were active in our addictions had much to be angry about. The damage we did was real. We were present physically, but we weren’t functioning fully. Many of us were self-centered and emotionally absent. Whether as partners or friends, parents or children, employees or employers, we couldn’t be depended on.

People around us learned not to count on us in certain ways, and those who didn’t reject us may have enabled our addictions by making excuses for us, rationalizing to themselves about our inadequacies, and shouldering more than their share of mutual responsibilities.

Now that we’re safely in recovery, the truth of what they’ve had to put up with may be more painfully obvious to them than before. The anger and hurt they’ve been keeping inside all this time may come spilling out of them.

Understanding that our addictive behavior has had an impact on others is a crucial part of our recovery. They have their own healing process to go through. We can’t hurry it or make it happen.

Today, I practice patience and compassion for all those who have been affected by my addiction.

**************************************************

~ THE EYE OPENER ~

The reformed drunkard has simply corrected his former drinking abuses. With this single exception he is the same man with the same defects of character that marked his life in his drinking days.

In contrast, the real AA has experienced a revolutionary moral change. He has put the operation of his life into the care and under the direction of the God of his understanding. Not only has he corrected his drinking abuses but he has turned his entire life over to the care of Him who is the source of, and indeed is, Good.

**************************************************

~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

HAPPINESS

Happiness is not a matter of good fortune or worldly possessions. It’s a mental attitude. It comes from appreciating what we have, instead of being miserable about what we don’t have. It’s so simple−yet so difficult for the human mind to comprehend.

*************************************************

~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

NO VENGEANCE

“Hatred ceases not with hatred,” said the Light of Asia, enunciating this great cosmic truth many centuries earlier, and the Light of the World put in the forefront of his teaching because it is the cornerstone of man’s salvation.

This doctrine of “resist not evil” is the great metaphysical secret. To the world it sounds like moral suicide, the feeblest surrender to aggression; but in the light of the Jesus Christ revelation it is seen to be superb spiritual strategy. Antagonize any situation, and you give it power against yourself; offer mental non-resistance, and it crumbles away in front of you.

Jesus gives no instructions for details of external conflict, and so the references here to suing at law, to coat and cloak, to lending and borrowing, to turning the other cheek, are illustrative and symbolical of mental states, and are not to be taken in the narrow literal sense. We cannot to often remind ourselves that if the thought is right, the deed cannot be wrong. No teacher could ever say that a given act must necessarily be right at any time, because the play of circumstances in human life is too hopelessly complicated for any such prediction.

If, when someone is behaving badly, you will imediatelly switch your attention from the human to the Divine, and concentrate upon God, or upon the real spiritual self of the person in question, you will find that his conduct will immediately change. This is the true revenge.

Delay beloved, avenge not yourselves . . . for it is written, Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord (Romans 12:19)

**************************************************

~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Swimming Naked

Few is the number of those who think with their own minds and feel with their own hearts.

~ Albert Einstein ~

One day a friend and I set out to swim au naturel in the mountain pools near my home. Soon after we arrived, a few people showed up. I should probably put my bathing suit on, I thought. These people may find my nudity offensive. Then I thought, But I was here first. Besides, most people swim naked here. I’ll just carry on as I am and trust that everyone will be fine.

A short time later, a family showed up. Now I should really put my suit on, I thought. But we were here first, I remembered. Kids usually go naked anyway. I’ll just trust that everyone will be okay with it. Half an hour later, a tour group arrived. Off the mini-van the Japanese poured, camcorders rolling. Now I really better get dressed, I figured. By this time, however, I was enjoying myself immensely. If they don’t like it, that’s their problem, I reasoned. Besides, I was here first. So went the day. Everyone else wore swimsuits, but they seemed fine with us being naked, and we all enjoyed ourselves. When we finally left, I felt a deep sense of peace.

Do you have the courage to swim naked even when others are wearing their suits? I am not referring to being physically naked; it is infinitely more important to be spiritually naked—to be who you are, whatever you are, where you are, and to act from a sense of inner vitality rather than social accommodation.

Give me the courage to be what I am. In the presence of Your love, I have nothing to hide and everything to celebrate.

Who and what I am is enough.


*****

The Eye Opener

The reformed drunkard has simply corrected his former drinking abuses. With this single exception, he is the same man with the same defects of character that marked his life in his drinking day.

In contrast, the real AA has experienced a revolutionary moral change. He has put the operation of his life into the care and under the direction of the God of his understanding. Not only has he corrected his drinking abuses, but he has turned his entire life over to the care of Him who is the source of, and indeed is, Good.

*****

Around the Year with Emmet Fox

No Vengeance

“Hatred ceases not with hatred,” said the Light of Asia, enunciating this great cosmic truth many centuries earlier, and the Light of the World put it in the forefront of his teaching because it is the cornerstone of man’s salvation.
This doctrine of “resist not evil” is the great metaphysical secret. To the world it sounds like moral suicide, the feeblest surrender to aggression; but in the light of the Jesus Christ revelation it is seen to be superb spiritual strategy. Antagonize any situation, and you give it power against yourself; offer mental nonresistance, and it crumbles away in front of you.
Jesus gives no instructions for details of external conduct, and so the references here to suing at law, to coat and cloak, to lending and borrowing, to turning the other cheek, are illustrative and symbolical of mental states, and are not to be taken in the narrow literal sense. We cannot too often remind ourselves that if the thought is right, the deed cannot be wrong. No teacher could ever say that a given act must necessarily be right at any time, because the play of circumstances in human life is too hopelessly complicated for any such prediction.
If, when someone is behaving badly, you will immediately switch your attention from the human to the Divine, and concentrate upon God, or upon the real spiritual self of the person in question, you will find that his conduct will immediately change. This is the true revenge.
Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves . . . for it is written, Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord (Romans 12:19)

[bluidkiti]

May 5

Step by Step

" ...our problems were of our own making. Bottles were only a symbol." - Alcoholics Anonymous, Third Edition, 1976, p 103

Today, accept that I and I alone am responsible for my problems, that I and I alone am responsible for being an alcoholic and that I and I alone can identify and correct the "symbol" on which my addiction is based. If I lost a job, spouse or partner because of drinking and I continued drinking or began to drink to "cope" with resentment or a sense of loss, the problem is my handling of those feelings, not the situations themselves. Anger and resentment, then, are the "symbol" of my defective character, and it is that defect which I must identify in my Fourth and hand over to my higher power in the Sixth and Seventh steps. Something must replace the void when anger and resentment are relinquished, however, and the service edict of the 12th Step - carrying the message to other alcoholics - suffices in turning my attention from myself to others who need and want the message. Today, I accept that I am responsible for my problems and that I and I alone am responsible to their consequences. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M.

**************************************************

~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

A WAY OF LIFE

The 12 Step way of life is meant to be bread for daily living, not cake for special occasions.

~ Anonymous ~

The glow of early recovery usually wears off after a little while. The pink cloud of “wow, this is the greatest thing I have ever run into” subsides after time in the Program. We are called to action at some point. There is much work ahead of us in recovery. This is not the kind of work that can be crammed into a couple of weekend follow-ups. The Fellowship is a way of life.

When we checked the last time, live was still lived one day at a time. Recovery is a bond we make with ourselves, before God, for the rest of our lives. We are reminded, “them which stops going to meetings are not present at meetings to hear what happens to them which stops going to meetings!”

I may have begun recovery to get the “heat” off my back, but I have learned the Program is a way of life for the rest of my life.

**************************************************

~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Don’t brood on what’s past, but never forget it either.

~ Thomas H. Raddall ~

When we make big changes in our lives for the better, as we have all done, we naturally grieve the time we lost by not learning our lessons sooner. There’s no way to avoid that grief, but there’s no point in dwelling on it. Some of us get hooked by feelings of regret. We brood over the ways we let others down, and we wish we could relive certain events and do better with them this time. It is important for us all to release the past—let it go.

Our life is now. If we spend our conscious moments living in the past and regretting our mistakes, we never get on with living a good life in the present. A truly humble man accepts the forgiveness of others and the forgiveness of his Higher Power. He accepts the universal truth that we are all broken in some ways, and our self-acceptance isn’t based upon what we did or didn’t do in the past, but on how we live today.

Today I look back at where I have come from and feel grateful for a new life.

**************************************************

~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

My daily choice is to rise and shine or rise and whine.

~ Anonymous ~

Complaining about every detail of our lives seems so natural. We always have a preconception about what “should be.” Then, of course, “what is” is never quite right. But it is possible to change this pattern of thinking. Contrary to what we may have believed up until now, this pattern is made by us. It doesn’t happen to us.

At first it may seem overwhelming to try to change a behavior that is so rooted in who we are. And we’ll continue the pattern many times every day, for weeks, maybe months, before we break it. But the point is that we can change. Every time we decide to respond positively to a situation, we succeed.

Time, patience, and practice will make new habits old ones. Willingness to try again every time we fail will prove this to us.

I will not whine today. If I start, I’ll stop myself and say something positive instead.

**************************************************

~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I am forgiving myself

Without the understanding and strength I gained doing the first three Steps, I couldn’t have begun to work Step Four. Here, I start to look at the people I have hurt−myself among them− and the damage I have done. It is a difficult process that I wish I could put off. But I cannot.

Sometimes I feel badly about myself during this “fearless and searching” review. But it will help if I work on Step Four a little at a time and remind myself that what I am doing in the program is the best thing I have ever done for myself (or others). I am changing, growing, recovering. Knowing that I’m doing what I need to do and feeling better gives me strength for my Fourth Step inventory.

I will work a little on Step Four today and write out an affirmation that reads, “I am learning to accept and forgive myself.”

*************************************************

~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

You should go to a pear tree for pears, not an elm.

~ Publilius Syrus ~

Before, our social life probably revolved around people and places where alcohol and drugs were available. Now, some days can be full of conflict until we find a new life where temptation isn’t a problem. It does no good to waste time wishing we could be with old friends and enjoy that old excitement. We gave in to temptation many times before, and the results were always the same.

No matter how serene we feel, chances are a time will come when we’re just too discouraged, too depressed, or too disgusted to fight the urge to have “just one more” binge. We may recover from that relapse — but we may not. So for us, there is only one choice.

Once we make that choice, a whole new world is waiting for us, with things we never dreamed we could be part of. Every city in the country has free or low-cost places to visit, things to do. Old hobbies and interests we gave up years ago seem interesting again. People are waiting out there for us, too. Once we thought everybody was living in chaos just like us. Now we know the world is full of clean and sober people just waiting for us to join them.

Today help me look for the good things in life. Help me stay open to new possibilities.

**************************************************

~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

Confusion is a word we have invented for an order which is not understood.

~ Henry Miller ~

Recovery is a process of gaining better understanding of the truth about your addiction and how it affected your life and the lives of others, the truth about how the tools of the program work, and the truth that arises from gaining greater knowledge and understanding.

You may find that many things in the past that you once accepted as truth are now untrue, such as lies you told yourself or things that were covered up by others. Sometimes it may seem that you are trying to re-learn so many things that it is easy to become confused and overwhelmed, and to feel a bit lost.

It is easy to lose your way as you follow the path to recovery. It is not unusual to feel frightened and alone. At such times, others in the program will be there for you. They will pay attention to your confusion and be honest with you. Your Higher Power will also listen to you and guide you toward the truth. All you need to do is ask for guidance from others and pray for God’s guidance, and you will find the truth.

When I feel lost, the truth of others, the truth of the program, and the truth of my Higher Power will lead me back to safety.

**************************************************

~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

You would do well to budget your time as follows: one-half in work, taking care of personal belongings, etc.; one-fourth in social pastimes with others, both young and old; and one-fourth as an interested, pleased observer of life.

~ William B. Terhune ~

Every life needs a balance of work, play, and rest. When we're not at work, we need to pursue other interests like hobbies, socializing, going to movies. When we're not at work and not pursuing an interest, we need to rest. Resting doesn't mean just sleeping. Resting is also meditating, listening to relaxing music, or watching the birds at our bird feeders.

Our financial budget tells us where our money is spent. Our time budget can do the same thing. By noticing where we spend most of our time, we can make sure all our time isn’t spent doing just work, just play, or just rest.

I can look at my time budget and ask: “Where haven't I spent any time lately?" I need to use my time doing something l haven't done to balance my budget.

**************************************************

~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Acknowledging addiction’s power

We talk about mood-altering chemicals as cunning, baffling, and powerful. And it’s true—there are many subtle, sly ways in which we set ourselves up to use again. For example, if we preferred one drug, we might try to convince ourselves that it was okay to use a different one. Or, we might say, “Well, I just didn’t know it was so dangerous.” Some of us just keep hanging around our using “friends.”

We may use many tricky, deceitful plans on ourselves in order to go back to using, even though we know these behaviors are dangerous. Even though we know that by setting ourselves up time and again we will only succeed in destroying our program.

Have I stopped setting myself up?

Higher Power, look out for me when I’m not capable of doing so.

Today I will remind myself of addiction’s power by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

**************************************************

~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

No one's career plans include becoming an addict....

~ JEFFREY SKINNER ~

Newcomer

I had a haircut today. The hairdresser had just come back from Holland, where certain drugs are legal, and he talked about “space cakes”—cakes filled with marijuana and hashish—that he’d eaten on the plane instead of drinking. I said that I didn’t drink any more, and that the thought of flying made me anxious. He said, “Well, you can have a Valium, can’t you?” I just nodded. For a moment, it seemed reasonable.

Sponsor

Watching people use, or listening to them refer casually to drugs or behavior that for us is poison, can be disturbing. We may envy these people. We may try to explain ourselves to them. We may mistakenly try to save them, even when they haven’t shown any signs of identifying their behavior or substance use as a problem of addiction.

We can save ourselves a lot of trouble by not trying to diagnose other people’s problems. We can share stories about encounters like yours in a meeting, where everyone will laugh with recognition. Above all, we can remember, as you did, that there is no room in a life of recovery for any sort of self-prescribed mood changer.

Today, I live and let live. I respect my recovery and don’t have to explain or justify it to anyone.

**************************************************

~ THE EYE OPENER ~

When we emerge from under our tons of troubles, get back on our feet and begin to live like other folks again, we somehow feel that the world has become a better place and that when our troubles vanished, all troubles vanished and there were few, if any, left in the world.

The store of world troubles is as great now as ever—only different people are having them. If you have no troubles of your own go out and find somebody else’s. They are not half so hard to carry and your heart and soul need the exercise.

**************************************************

~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

MY BILL OF RIGHTS

I have the right to be treated with respect.
I have the right to say no and not feel guilty.
I have the right to experience and express my feelings.
I have the right to take time for myself.
I have the right to change my mind.
I have the right to ask for what I want.
I have the right to ask for information.
I have the right to make mistakes.
I have the right to less than I am humanly capable of.
I have the right to feel good about myself.
I have the right to act only in ways that promote my dignity and self-respect as long as others are not violated in the process.

*************************************************

~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

DISSIPATING EVIL

If somebody comes into the room at home, or into the office or shop, looking as if he meant to make trouble, just try switching your attention straight to the Divine, instead of squaring up aggressively to meet the difficulty or shrinking away to avoid it, according to your temperament. You will be amused and gratified to see the anger fade from the subject’s face (which will mean it has faded from his heart too) and quite a different expression take its place.

I have myself seen several cases where men, and on two occasions, children, were actually fighting, and upon a spectator’s “turning the cheek” the strife ceased like magic. Animals respond even more easily to this treatment than do human beings. I have seen two instances where dogs were fighting savagely and all efforts to separate them had failed, when the realization of the Presence of God’s love in all His creatures restored peace. In one case it took several minutes’ work; in the other it was practically instantaneous.

Be not overcome of evil, but overcome evil with good (Romans 12:21).

**************************************************

~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Gambling for God

Do as the heavens have done, forget your evil.

~ from A Winter’s Tale, by William Shakespeare ~

A man knocked feverishly on the rabbi’s door one morning. “Rabbi, I came to tell you that Shlomo, Samuel, and Ben were up all night gambling!”

“Wonderful!” exclaimed the rabbi.

Shocked, the man complained, “How can you say that? It is against the laws of our religion to gamble!”

“I know,” answered the sage, “but these men are finding the energy to stay awake to do something they love. When their hearts turn to love the Lord, they will have the ability to stay up all night to serve God.” We cannot judge or condemn another person’s act because we do not know how it fits into the bigger picture of their life or the lives of those they touch. At any given moment, we see only a tiny sliver of a huge jigsaw puzzle that only makes sense on a level that is broader than any human being can understand.

Ultimately, every experience contributes to spiritual awakening. The Holy Spirit sees only love, and when we lift our vision, we behold a miraculous universe.

Help me to see all persons and events in the loving light of spiritual perception.

My eyes are God's eyes. I exchange judgment for compassion and look upon a forgiven world.

[bluidkiti]

May 6

Step by Step

"Those who do not recover are people who cannot or will not completely give themselves to this simple program, usually men and women who are constitutionally incapable of being honest with themselves." - Alcoholics Anonymous, Ch 5, Third Edition, 1976, p 58.

Today, should I feel insecure and tempted to drink and repeated slip or relapse, I have to ask if I am one of those who is "constitutionally incapable" of being honest with myself. If I am, I need to ask if I have rejected the program's first four words:"Admitted (I am) powerless ..." And if I have not taken Step One, the question is simple: do I want to drink more than I don't want to drink. But if I am as honest as I can in trying to get with the program but still struggle, maybe I am not doing it "One Day at a Time" and thinking in terms of the rest of my life without drinking. The "cure" to that line of thought is simple: today is all any of us has with no guarantee of a tomorrow. I need only to think of the rest of my life as today. And I ask today, if I am constitutionally capable of honesty - first with myself. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M.

**************************************************

~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

PURPOSE IN LIFE

The reward of a thing well done is to have done it.

~ Emerson ~

The same miracle that started our recovery from addiction gave us a chance for a second life. It also brought us a purpose in life. This was something we had lacked for years. This purpose for our life makes it possible to achieve a state of happiness and peace of mind.

This purpose is to help others. Unless our hearts are filled with the principles of our new way of life, we are not doing our best. The spiritual growth that comes from pursuing a purpose in life makes each day a joy for us and makes our existence worthwhile. Long-timers remind us, “Be as enthusiastic about your recovery as you were about your addiction.”

I never want to say, “This I must do.” I want to say, “This I want to do.” Serving a purpose in life is only a small repayment for the gift of recovery.

**************************************************

~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Memory is the diary we all carry about with us.

~ Oscar Wilde ~

Our memories create the substance of our identity. People who lose their memory lose any sense of who they are. Some of us have memories of painful events in our childhood, or of traumas that changed our image of ourselves. Those of us who were abused by parents have to learn in adulthood to fill those gaps by becoming good parents to ourselves. Some of us have become trapped at a younger stage of development by painful memories. Now, it is essential to our healing that we not perpetuate our own abuse.

We have to learn to include ourselves in the human family. No matter what we experienced, no matter what we feel, it is all part of what it means to be human. We can heal our memories, not by changing them, but by making peace with them so we are free to live in the present. A man can imagine the little boy he once was— and imagine taking that youngster on his lap and promising him that he will take care of him and keep him safe.

Today I will be a good parent to myself and treat myself with love and respect

**************************************************

~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Seeking strength from others prevents us from finding our own strength.

~ Georgette Vickstrom ~

The principles of this program, the friends we have made here, sponsors, and the contact we have with an ever-available Higher Power afford us valuable strength. However, it’s important that we develop our own strength to complement what we look for in others.

Using the tools acquired in this program is a good beginning for cultivating personal strength. It’s like growing a garden. We need to tend it daily, nurturing it, discarding the unproductive behaviors like weeds. When we do, we’ll discover that the seedlings we’re planting at every meeting are taking root and developing blossoms that signal positive growth.

I will be painstaking in nurturing my growth today. My strength will be there when I need it.

**************************************************

~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I now know how treatment has helped

I didn’t want to be in treatment. I was afraid to have to work on both my addiction and emotional illnesses. I didn’t think it would help. I didn’t know anybody and everybody looked strange to me. For the first few days, I tried to get out and go home (such as it was).

But once I settled down a little, I could see that being away from my daily routine was helpful. I relaxed a little and got to where I could concentrate better. I got to a place where I felt much less tempted to use and was taking my medication regularly. The best part, however, was that I started meeting people who tried to understand me. All this has helped.

Today I will remember two things I learned in treatment that have helped.

*************************************************

~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

...if they dare not forgive, what becomes of harmony?

~ Fedor Mikhailovich Dostoevski ~

We may think we’re being noble when we refuse to forgive ourselves for things we did in the past, but this false humility is often another form of denial. If we truly accept that addiction is a disease we did not ask for, then we are willing to forgive ourselves. If we still think it’s a matter of willpower and strength of character, then of course we won’t forgive ourselves for not being strong enough or smart enough. And if we don’t think well enough of ourselves to forgive, how will we treat others?

Accepting our human limitations is a major step in recovery. Now we don’t expect ourselves to be all-powerful. We’ve surrendered to powerlessness and come to believe our Higher Power will help us. We don’t have to do it all alone, and we don’t have to be perfect. Now we can accept, forgive, and love ourselves with our faults. We can find harmony.

Today I recognize I have a disease. Help me accept my powerlessness.

**************************************************

~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

But buds will be roses, and kittens, cats

~ Louisa May Alcott ~

Think of how a tree grows. From a tiny seed it splits the soil, spreads its roots, and begins its skyward climb. Over time, the trunk widens, the bark becomes firm and thick, the branches spread ever outward. Season after season, the tree continues its growth until, years later, a massive tree has formed.

You are, in many ways, like a tree. But before you entered the program, you were not a very hardy tree. You were rooted in soil that provided you with little nourishment. You were trying to grow within a forest that deprived you of life-sustaining water and sunshine. Your growth was stunted, and your survival was always in doubt.

Recovery, however, has transplanted you to a soil that is rich with nutrients, in a forest with ample room to grow. The illumination is now plentiful so you can grow strong and tall. Your roots are now firmly entrenched in the ground so you can withstand stormy weather. The longer you are in recovery, the deeper your roots will be. You now are part of a forest of fellowship that encourages the growth of one so that all may grow together.

The love and nourishment given by those in the program encourages my growth and strengthens me.

**************************************************

~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

It has never been, and never will be, easy work! But the road that is built in hope is more pleasant to the traveler than the road built in despair, even though they both lead to the same destination.

~ Marian Zimmer Bradley ~

Think for a moment about a city nearby. Now picture the many roads that lead to that city. One may be a winding road. One may be an expressway. No matter which one is taken, it will still reach the same destination. But what will matter is how pleasant the journey is along the way.

Before we entered the program, we probably traveled on the road marked despair. We didn't know there were other roads for our journey. But the program has taught us there are many roads to recovery: strength, hope, peace, happiness, caring, and love.

As long as we keep recovery as our destination, we may choose to travel any road of the program we like. If we've traveled today on the road called despair, we can change our road tonight to one of hope. As long as the program is our destination, we need not worry about losing our way.

Which road will I travel tonight? Where will this road lead me?

**************************************************

~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Being humble

We are always simply servants of our groups, not presidents or authorities. We all take turns doing God’s work. If we take on more than we can handle, chances are we’ll feel martyred or we’ll simply drop out. But this is not common when we share ourselves in the true spirit of service.

If we act in the true spirit of humility, cleaning up or putting up chairs will never be too low a task for us, and being a committee member will never be too exalted.

Am I developing humility?

Higher Power, help me to see how I might serve my group today in whatever capacity.

Today I will practice humility in serving my brothers and sisters by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

**************************************************

~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Popularity is a Siren singing on a rock.

~ ANTHONY BURGESS ~

Newcomer

There’s someone who’s kind of a “star” at one of my regular meetings. Everyone seems to look up to him and love him. To me, he sounds stern and critical. Sometimes I don’t raise my hand, thinking he’d disapprove of what I’d say.

Sponsor

“Principles before personalities” is a slogan that reminds me not to cultivate an attitude of worship toward any person in this fellowship. “Stars” are just other people in recovery, like us. No one person has all the answers. There are old- timers whose experience, love for the program, honesty, and humility are precious gifts. Newcomers, too, can add to what we learn about our addictions. We don’t go to meetings to judge others, but to listen for what speaks to us and furthers our recovery.

Like you, I’ve sometimes fallen under the spell of a high-profile personality. Why invest one person with so much power? Why let one person’s approval be so important here, of all places, where we can experience unconditional love? Why even assume that he or she has an opinion of us?

In recovery, we have the chance to get to know ourselves. Making a Higher Power out of another recovering person is an obstacle, not an aid, in this process.

Today, I focus on principles before personalities.

**************************************************

~ THE EYE OPENER ~

AA is the outgrowth of a long period of experimentation. It is true that two men conceived the idea but it was only incorporated into a working plan after pooling the experiences of a hundred more.

The “Big Book” is a collection of ideas and experiences. There is no one in AA who can say “I, and I alone, conceived the idea in its entirety, I, and I alone organized it; I, and I alone control it.” No man—with all due appreciation to the founders—developed AA, for AA is a program of growth; it has grown from the day of its inception and is still in the process of growth and development.

We move onward and upward, side by side and hand in hand, helping and sustaining one another. This way we will advance, but when someone begins to control and command, deserters will outnumber recruits.

**************************************************

~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

WALK WITH ME

Don’t walk in front of me . . . I may not follow.
Don’t walk behind me . . . I may not lead.
Just walk beside me and be my friend.

*************************************************

~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

THE TRIUMPH OF LOVE

Read Matthew 5:43−47.

But I said unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hare you, and pray for them that despitefully use you, and persecute you; That ye may be the children of your Father which is in heaven . . . (Matthew 5:44−45)

Right reaction is the supreme art of life, and Jesus compressed the secret of that art into a sentence when he said: Resist not evil. A correct understanding of this commandment will regenerate your body, liberate your soul, and remake your life.

Love is God and is therefore absolutely all-powerful. Meeting hatred with Love is the perfect method of self-defense in all circumstances. It renders you absolutely invulnerable to any kind of attack.

If you received bad news, if you are unhappy in your work, or in your home, feel out mentally for the Presence of divine Spirit, all around you; affirm its actuality; and claim that God has dominion over all conditions, and you will soon be free.

And this commandment have we from him, That he who loveth God love his brother also (1 John 4:21).

**************************************************

~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

What Could Be So Important?

Make not treasures on earth, where moth and rust corrupt and thieves break in and steal. Find your treasures in heaven. Wherever a man’s treasures are, there will be his heart.

~ Jesus Christ ~

When I travel, I carry a black briefcase that contains all of my important materials, including a computer, airline tickets, checks I have received, and an address book. Because these items are so vital, I keep the briefcase with me almost all the time. Before delivering a lecture one evening, I set the briefcase down next to the stage, and when I looked for it after the talk, it was not there. Suddenly my heart seemed to skip a beat, and I felt a sinking feeling in my chest. My fear that the satchel had been stolen was almost debilitating. When I asked the lecture sponsor if she had seen the briefcase, she answered, “Oh yes, I put it in my office for safekeeping.”

While I was relieved that the briefcase was safe, I could not help but notice how I had tied my peace to it. I asked myself, “What in that briefcase could be so important that I would lose the peace of God with it?” I wondered how much the anxiety over protecting the property had cost me in the long run. It was a poor trade. What you possess possesses you. Whenever we value a thing more than happiness, we pay a dear price. Things can be replaced, but peace cannot.

Is there anything you value so much that you would lose your happiness if you lost it? Have you succumbed to worshiping at the altar of fear rather than the citadel of trust? What is your black briefcase?

The Sufis suggest, “Do not value anything that could be washed overboard from a ship.” When we remember we are here to love, all else becomes secondary.

Help me keep You first today. Let me not make any false gods before You.

I live to love. I am safe. My heart is at peace.

[bluidkiti]

May 7

Step by Step

" ...(I)t is not surprising that our drinking careers have been characterized by countless vain attempts to prove we could drink like other people. The idea that somehow, someday (we) will control and enjoy (our) drinking is the great obsession of every abnormal drinker. ...Many pursue it into the gates of insanity or death." - Alcoholics Anonymous, Third Edition, 1976, Ch 3, p 30.

Today, if I hold onto the illusion that I can keep or resume drinking because of the myths of "controlled drinking" or abstinence for any length of time, I lied to myself when I "admitted (I am) powerless ..." and I am little more than a dry drunk. Also, I learned nothing or denied the cost of my drinking and believe either the outcome of drinking yet to come might be better than it was in the past or that I am above responsibility to the consequences of my drinking. If so, I look today to a higher power for the humility to surrender myself and my will to His and, with His wisdom, find the honesty to work through my self-deception and get on with the program. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M.

*****

The Eye Opener

We often wonder at the cooperation given us by non-alcoholics wherever AA takes root. A lot of it probably results from a high sense of public spirit; some lend their support because they have no valid reason for opposition; some because of admiration of the fact that we are one organization that hasn't got its hand out continually.

We strongly suspect, though, that most of it is due to the fact that the alcoholics, the near-alcoholics and the potential alcoholics represent a pretty fair majority of any community.

*****

~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

MANDATE FOR PERFECTION

Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father which is in heaven is perfect (Matthew 5:48).

Consider carefully what Jesus is saying. He is commanding us to be perfect, even as God Himself is perfect; and, as we know that Jesus will not command the impossible, he has here given his authority to the doctrine that it is possible for man to become divinely perfect. And, more than this, he is putting it forward as a thing that will have to be actually done.

Now, if we really are the children of God, capable of eternal and flawless perfection, there can be no real power in evil, not even in sin, to keep us permanently in bondage. So now let us lose no further time commencing our upward march. Let us now−at this very moment, if we have not already done so−rise up, like the prodigal son amid the husks of materiality and limitation, and cry, with all confidence in the teaching and Promises of Jesus:

I will arise and go to my father (Luke 15:18).

**************************************************

~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

PRAYER

Who comes from prayer a better man, his prayer is answered.

~ George Meredith ~

We learn that prayer is only a wish away. When we wished for recovery more than anything in the world, we found it. Thus our wishes became our prayers.. It was that simple.

We discover in recovery that prayer is best when it is a conversation with a Higher Power. It isn’t just a one-way speech where we tell God what we expect to have happen. It isn’t a time to try to bargain with God. We listen as well as ask. Then meditation joins with prayer.

When life beats us to our knees, our only recourse is to stay on our knees and start praying.

When my prayers aren’t answered right away, that doesn’t mean that God is denying them. The answers will come in God’s time, not mine. The answers will be God’s answers, not mine.

**************************************************

~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Everything becomes a little different as soon as it is spoken out loud.

~ Hermann Hesse ~

Central to our healing and recovery is telling our story and hearing the stories others have to tell. Something changes when we first speak out loud to another per-son to tell what we were like, what we have experienced, and what we feel now. Most people feel great relief when they say what they have on their minds. Often we don’t fully know what we feel or think until we put it into words. The telling of it to an attentive listener bridges the gap between us.

Putting our stories into words gives them a form they didn’t have before and gives us handles to begin to deal with our experience. When we tell the story of our pain, our mistakes, and our triumphs, the words are the symbols that allow us to let go and move on.

Today I will talk to someone about my experience, describing either a small feeling or a big one.

**************************************************

~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

We all carry within us a very wise person, the little child. To hear her call, to question her wants, is to affirm her wisdom, to deepen our roots.

~ Margo Casey ~

Our inner child is helping us grow, understand, and heal. She has walked with us always, though we may not have been aware of her presence. She will be with us forever, even when we fail to remember her presence. Calling on her, we can gain the confidence and insight we need to perform today’s tasks and fulfill our dreams for tomorrow.

How lucky we are to have learned of the presence of our inner child. In years past when our struggles overwhelmed us, she was there, but we didn’t know how to reach her, how to listen to her. Now we do, and our lives reflect our growing wisdom. They reflect our reliance on her voice, which blends with the voice of our Higher Power to become one unified guide.

We will never again suffer the struggles that tormented our past if we stay open to the spirit-filled message that is always just a quiet moment away. Going within will assure us serenity.

I will turn to my inner voice today and know that all will be well if I follow the guidance she offers.

**************************************************

~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I can make it through the pain

I can’t relax. I feel sad and I’m angry at myself. It’s hard to concentrate, especially at work. Sometimes my mind goes blank. I keep forgetting things.

My friends tell me that such emotions are not uncommon in dual disorder recovery. (I thought I was the only one who had ever felt that way.) Quitting an addiction and starting therapy for emotional problems are powerful changes. It’s reassuring when they say that I am not “crazy” (I just feel like it) and that in a couple of weeks the medication I started will help me settle down (although I would prefer the pain to go away now). I am grateful to my friends especially because they keep telling me, “You can get through the pain.” Yes, I can get through the pain.

I will take two walks today and jot down two activities I can do with my hands.

*************************************************

~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

How long does it take before you want to go to meetings?

~ A newcomer ~

Often, we don’t feel like a meeting. After working all day, we’re tired, and going to a meeting sometimes seems like too much trouble. We have to force our feet to move. But we go, and every single time, something magic happens. We feel loved, we feel we belong, we feel that the world is a wonderful place and we’re part of it.

Other people talk, telling us their hardest secrets. We may talk, and tell them our secrets, and our burden lifts; we’re free again. We’re part of the love that fills the room, sharing our struggle and serenity with others as they share theirs with us.
We are not alone, and we can be grateful for all the reminders we have of this. Whenever we need to listen or talk, whenever we need to feel accepted or loved, whenever we need to share our joy, there is a meeting waiting for us. Now we have the choice of life or death, and we can keep that freedom to choose by choosing life.

Today let me choose life even if I’m tired or afraid.

**************************************************

~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

The weak in courage is strong in cunning.

~ William Blake ~

At times you may feel that recovery is so hard that you just want to give it a rest. You want to say, “I am over and done with it.” You may convince yourself that because you are doing so well—after all, you have not engaged in your habit for a while—you are now safe. Or perhaps you have practically memorized the Big Book or heard the slogans and said the Serenity Prayer so many times that you think, “Yes, I have it. I get it.” And so you may stop going to meetings or doing the work you need to do.

But just because you have stopped your habit does not mean you are “cured.” Just because you think you know everything there is to know in recovery does not signify completion. To think anything different is to practice self-deception. It is denying that your recovery is a lifelong, daily commitment.

Your recovery today can only be done today. You always have the option to return to your former life, but to make that choice means you risk losing everything you have gained. So resolve that, just for today, you will continue to persevere on your road to recovery.

Just for today, I will continue to do the work of my recovery.

**************************************************

~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Don't waste your time striving for perfection; Instead strive for excellence−doing your best.

~ Sir Laurence Olivier ~

We've all heard that even the most beautiful rose has is thorns. But as that rose was growing, the gardener didn't waste time trying to snip off the thorns. Instead, by using the right combination of sunshine, water, and nutrients, the gardener knew the rose would grow healthy and strong.

We are both the rose and the gardener. We are beautiful, yet we have our thorns−our defects of character. We may have seen some of those thorns showing today. But as gardeners we have some very special tools for our growth: the program, the Twelve Steps, the slogans, and the fellowship. By using these tools, we are assured of healthy growth.

We will always have our thorns. But we can still be beautiful as long as we tend to ourselves with patience, love, and the proper tools.

Did I try to strive for excellence today? How can I use the program to help my growth?

**************************************************

~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Returning to sanity

For most of us, staying straight was always very difficult and very serious. Some of us took longer to realize this. The highlight of our insanity was trying to prove that some-how we were different, somehow we could get out of the work that was required, somehow we could find an easier, softer way out than the Twelve Step program.

All this trial and error with our lives on the line. Our “insanity” is extreme at times and nothing short of a spiritual awakening. Guidance from our Higher Power can restore us to sanity.

Is my insanity behind me?

Higher Power, help me learn how to return to sanity. Teach me to live in a drug-free world.

I will work my program today by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

© 1974, 1998 by Hazelden Foundation

**************************************************

~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Who says we’re not living in a time of war.

~ ALI LIEBEGOTT ~

Newcomer

Sometimes people in meetings talk about suicide attempts they made when they were active in their addictions. Talking about it at a meeting seems unnecessarily heavy to me—it’s not everyone’s experience.

Sponsor

The disease that we have is a fatal one, if it’s left untreated. Some of us made suicide attempts in the past. Some of us believe we were never that desperate. But aren’t our active addictions a form of suicide, too? What about the damaging effect on our health, over time, of the substances we consumed? What about the dangerous situations we got ourselves into through impaired judgment? What about the small deaths: the people we shut out through our addictions, the meaningful work or pleasure we denied ourselves, the dreams we deferred?

Each day we have the choice of adopting attitudes and taking actions that lead to recovery or to addiction—to life or to death.

Today, I'm entrusted with the precious gift of my life.

**************************************************

~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

IT SHOWS IN YOUR FACE

You don’t have to tell how you live each day;
You don’t have to say if you work or play;
A tired, true barometer serves in the place.
However you live, it shows in your face.

The falseness, the deceit that you wear in your heart
Will not stay inside where it got its start;
For sinew and blood is a thin veil of lace.
However you live, it shows in your face.

If you have battled and won in the game of life,
If you feel you’ve conquered the sorrow and strife,
If you’ve played the game square and you stand on first base,
You don’t have to tell it, it shows on your face.

If your life’s been unselfish, for other you live’
And not what you get, but what you can give,
And you live close to God, in His infinite Grace,
You don’t have to tell it, it shows in your face.

**************************************************

~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Make Today Count

To enhance the quality of your relationships, imagine this is your last day with whomever you are with.

~ Og Mandino ~

The morning started out like any other. Mrs. Magliano drove her husband John and son Ted to the train station, kissed them goodbye, and wished them a nice day. But the day was not like any other. En route to New York City, a crazed gunman opened up fire on the train car, killing a large number of people including John Magliano, and seriously wounding his son.

I saw a television show documenting Ted’s recovery. With the help of loving friends and a positive attitude, he was making a remarkable comeback. I was struck by his mother’s reflections: “My last memory of my husband is kissing him good-bye and telling him, ‘I love you.’ I did that every day for 30 years, and I meant it. It brings my heart peace to know that we parted with a blessing."

We never really know if we will see any particular person again. That is why it is important to resolve conflict and bring our relationships into peace and healing without delay. In college I broke up with a girlfriend on bad terms. We avoided each other for a while and then saw each other at a party. “We need to talk,” she told me. We sat down and gently resolved our upset. A year later, I learned that she was killed in an auto accident. I was very glad that we had spoken words of kindness when we did.

Make a list of any situations or relationships with which you are out of peace. Pray and ask for guidance about what you can do to heal them. Go about your business of bringing them back into harmony. Then you can enjoy them, yourself, and your life.

Spirit of Love, open my heart. Help me to be at peace with all of my relationships. Let me not settle for upset or separation. I want my life to reflect Your love and blessings.

I create peace with my loved ones and myself.

[bluidkiti]

May 8

Step by Step

"Resentment is the 'number one' offender. It destroys more alcoholics than anything else." - Alcoholics Anonymous, Third Edition, 1976, Ch 5, p 64

Today, admitting that I may have little success in letting go of all my resentments, I re-examine that character defect to identify what or who I resent - and why. If I resent or envy others who can drink or I cannot accept the rest of my life without drinking, my resentment is likely against alcoholism itself - in which case I have fallen short in admitting I am powerless. I may resent that something stronger than me - alcohol - is what I cannot control. Or I may resent the ex-boss or estranged spouse or partner who will not rehire or come back to me even if I have stopped drinking. But whatever or whoever I resent, I cannot control what controls me, and I will never again drink to "handle it." In the end, if the root of my resentments is grounded in the disease of alcoholism, I need again to fully accept that I have no control over it and, instead of battling addiction, I will embrace being clean and sober. Today, instead of a recovering drunk, I am sober alcoholic. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M.

**************************************************

~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

EXPECT A MIRACLE

Don’t quit five minutes before the miracle happens.

~ Anonymous ~

When we came into the Program, most of us had very little to show for our lives. We believed in nothing. We had experienced great disappointments. The greedy creditor that was our addiction had stripped away everything of meaning to us. We were left with nothing but pain and misery.

Now we hear incredible stories of recovery. People tell how, by following certain simple instructions and honestly working a Program, they were freed from the grasp of their addiction.

Every once in awhile we hear a story that sounds remarkably like our own. We are told that through the work and help of a Higher Power, we too can receive a miracle.

The most important miracle I can expect and count on each day is the freedom from my addiction. I can trust that if I stay close to the Program, the miracle will be repeated, one day at a time.

**************************************************

~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Some things have to be believed to be seen.

~ Ralph Hodgson ~

Under the guidance of this recovery program we “came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.” Coming to believe something is a process. It might begin by borrowing someone else’s faith, trying it on as we might try on a shirt. We don’t start with a firm conviction. We don’t grow instantly from no faith to absolute faith. It might begin by seeing that forces are at work beyond our control, easing our terrible cravings or supporting us through the worst times.

Sometimes faith develops very slowly, like the first sprout of an acorn in the spring. At our meetings we encounter men who are like mighty oaks, but years ago, they were just beginning to send up tender sprouts. This process certainly takes us beyond what we can explain with rational description. We don’t have to understand it.

Today I am grateful for the faith that allows me to see what I could not otherwise see.

**************************************************

~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

If one is going to be truthful, one has to be very tender.

~ Florida Scott-Maxwell ~

Honesty is always the best policy, right? We glibly recite that saying, but it’s important to reevaluate its meaning when we are eager to correct or direct the actions of other people. If being honest will unnecessarily harm them, perhaps being silent is better.

The program is helping us restructure our lives. We discover that many former, automatic responses no longer fit who we desire to be. That means we have to try new, less-practiced behaviors, such as being honest without being harsh or critical.

Learning tenderness is possible. With the help of this program and one another, we are learning to express the acceptance and love that have been given to us by our Higher Power. Giving away what we have been given is sharing the truth absolutely.

I will not hurt anyone today by any comment. I will truthfully share the love and acceptance I have been given.

**************************************************

~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I am letting go of my low mood

I feel somewhat better this week. It is hard to describe (and it doesn’t quite make sense), but it feels like I am actually getting tired of being depressed. I feel worn out, as if purged of pain.

Even though I still have some symptoms to deal with, I believe that, for the first time, I can see light at the end of the tunnel. I can see that I am less obsessed with my problems. Maybe I can let go of some of this heaviness and darkness. It would be a relief.

I will do one fun activity today and wear bright clothes to enhance my spirits.

*************************************************

~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

A wise man is strong; yea, a man of knowledge increaseth strength.

~ Proverbs 24:5 ~

Relapse so often seems to begin with over-estimating our strengths and underestimating our weaknesses. The seeds of relapse are planted long before the actual event. Addiction is too strong for us; we must work hard to arrest it. If recovery is to become a lifetime experience, it’s our job to learn our limits and avoid things that can frighten, tempt, or bully us into relapse. We can start by learning to recognize areas that are dangerous for us. We can ask ourselves, how solid is our Twelve Step program? Are we going to meetings, or avoiding them? Have we chosen a sponsor? Are we following the recommended Steps of recovery?

During active addiction, we couldn’t make sane choices. But, now, every day, we’re getting healthy again, and we can avoid relapse. Asking for help from our Higher Power and Twelve Step group will give us the support and the answers we need. As we grow in recovery, we learn how to build on our strengths, not our weaknesses. One day at a time, we are changing and finding love.

Today help me see my behavior clearly, and recognize when I’m in danger.

**************************************************

~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

There’s folks ’ud stand on their heads and then say the fault was i’ their boots.

~ George Eliot ~

Who do you blame for where you are today? Perhaps you blame your parents because they were addicts and passed on the disease to you. Maybe you blame a family member for giving you your first drink or experience with a drug. Or maybe you blame a friend who encouraged you to toss aside your studies and responsibilities so you could join them in partying or acting out.

But when you use your recovery as a time to blame others or to seek a scapegoat to point to for causing your addiction, you are only hurting yourself. Blame serves no useful purpose. It is a set of blinders you put on so you cannot see that your recovery is your responsibility. Recovery is not about blaming, but about fixing. Blaming anything or anyone for your addiction only prolongs your misery and keeps you from focusing on how to achieve a better way of living.

Whether it was genes, choice, or circumstances that got you to where you are today, it truly does not matter. You alone are responsible for your recovery.

Today I will not play the blame game. I accept that I am an addict and will do the work I need to do so I can be a recovering addict.

**************************************************

~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Reach high, for stars lie hidden in your soul.
Dream deep, for every dream precedes the goal.

~ Pamela Vaull Starr ~

It has been said that if we tell ourselves what we'd like to dream about before we go to sleep, we can teach ourselves to dream our own dreams. Rather than letting our confusing dreams puzzle us or our nightmares frighten us, we can train our minds to think positive thoughts while we're resting. After a night of positive dreaming, we are more likely to wake up refreshed and ready to continue thinking positively.

Tonight we can prepare our dream by visualizing what it will be. We can close our eyes and see ourselves doing whatever we want to do or be whoever we want to be. Immediately alter this visualization, with it fresh in our minds, we can then lie down to sleep with the positive thoughts of the dream in our heads. Such positive thinking is one giant step toward an affirmation of ourselves.

What will I dream tonight? I can imagine the most positive thing and let it become a part of my sleeping thoughts.

**************************************************

~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Sticking to the basics

If we don’t stick to the basics, we’ll lose sight of who we are and where we came from. We are not perfect, spiritual giants. We’re drunks, junkies, and pill heads who have found a solution to our living problem, a practical solution to an impractical lifestyle.

And if we forget the basics—where we come from, working the Steps, and attending meetings—we may be subject to unrealistic ideals and illusions. These can get in the way of recovery.

Do I keep it simple?

Higher Power, help me to keep it simple and stick to the basics.

Today I’ll be sure to stick to the basics by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

**************************************************

~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Speak boldly, and speak truly, shame the devil.

~ JOHN FLETCHER ~

Newcomer

Last time I shared at a meeting, I felt foolish. There were other people in the room whose troubles were so much more serious than mine. I hate the sound of whining. I don’t want to be like that.

Sponsor

Sharing and listening to others share are the principal tools we have for staying in recovery. Though we may not get to share at every meeting we attend, it’s necessary to share often, and from the heart. It relieves the pressure inside us that we might otherwise be tempted to relieve by picking up our drug of choice. It’s wonderful that you’re putting your hand up and talking honestly about your experience And feelings as recovery continues. It’s required.

At meetings, I haven’t heard much of what some call whining, though I’ve certainly heard people in pain. We may sometimes sound as if we’re stuck in the same place for a while, but in time, we change. If we’re following the path of recovery, growth is inevitable. Neither we nor anyone else can gain anything in recovery by judging a person’s rate of growth or comparing one person’s healing process with another.

Today, I participate in restoring my own and others' health by sharing.

**************************************************

~ THE EYE OPENER ~

We have to think our way out of the quagmire we drank ourselves into. No one led us there and no one can lead us out. The older members can give you a few clues or hints but in the final analysis you have to figure it out for yourself in order to get permanent results.

You will find as you travel up that long road alone, however, that you have a host of real friends on the sidelines to cheer you on your way.

**************************************************

~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

THE TOUCH OF THE MASTER’S HAND

It was battered and scarred and the auctioneer
Thought it scarcely worth his while
To waste his time on the old violin,
But he held it up with a smile.
“What am I bid, good people?” he cried.
“Who starts the bidding for me?
One dollar? One dollar. Do I hear two?
Two dollars. Who makes it three?
Three dollars once, three dollars twice,
Going for three . . .” But no!
From the room, far back, a gray-bearded man
Came forward and picked up the bow.
Then wiping the dust from the old violin,
And tightening up the strings,
He played a melody, pure and sweet,
As sweet as the angel sings.
The music ceased, and the auctioneer,
With a voice that was quiet and low,
Said, “What now am I bid for this old violin?”
As he held it aloft with its bow.
“One thousand? One thousand, do I hear two?
Two thousand. Who makes it three?
Three thousand once, three thousand twice,
Going and gone!” said he.
The audience cheered, but some of them cried,
“We just don’t understand.
What changed its worth?” Swift came the reply,
“The touch of the master’s hand.”
And many a man, with life out of tune,
All battered with bourbon and gin,
Is auctioned cheap, to a thoughtless crowd,
Much like the old violin.
A mess of pottage, a glass of wine,
A game, and he travels on.
He is going once, he is going twice,
He is going, and almost gone.
But the Master comes and the foolish crowd
Never can quite understand
The worth of a soul, the change that is wrought,
By the Touch of the Master’s Hand.

*************************************************

~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

NONRESISTANCE

When you fight a thing you antagonize it and it hits back. The harder you fight it the harder it hits. When you give your attention to anything, you are building that thing into your consciousness, for good or evil.

A story is told about William Penn. He had been accustomed from boyhood to carry a sword because it was part of the dress of a gentleman at that period. One day it occurred to him that this was inconsistent with his Quakerism; but on the other hand he knew that he would feel extremely embarrassed without it. So he consulted George Fox, never doubting what his leader would say, “you must stop wearing it.” George Fox was silent for a few moments, and then said, “Carry thy sword until thou canst no longer carry it.”

A year or so later Penn discontinued the practice quite easily.

When you are faced with some negative condition, withdrawal your attention from it by building the opposite into your subconscious. Then the undesirable thing falls away like an overripe fruit.

Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report, if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things (Philippians 4:8).

**************************************************

~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

The Case for Forgiveness

Forgiveness is the only sane response.

~ A Course in Miracles ~

Successful attorney Michael Rembolt was dealing with an especially grisly divorce case. Both parties were making huge demands, and neither seemed willing to yield. When Michael sat down to pray on the morning of the court date, he remembered a lesson from A Course in Miracles: "Forgiveness offers me everything I want." He began to send prayers of forgiveness to his client and her husband. These thoughts felt so good that he extended his blessings to the opposing attorney, and then to the judge and everyone else scheduled for court that day. Michael arose from his prayer feeling a deep peace.

When he arrived at court that morning, Michael found no one there. He went to the judge’s office to find out what had happened, and the magistrate asked him, “Didn’t your secretary tell you that your client settled out of court?”

“That’s amazing!” Michael responded.

“What’s even more amazing,” the judge went on, “is that we had 32 cases on the docket today, and every one of them settled out of court!” Forgiveness is not just a wimpy act of withholding an attack for a wrongdoing; it is a dynamic, creative, and practical force that has the power to manifest miracles. When we let go of judgment, we free ourselves to enjoy a peace that surpasses anything the world has to offer. The power of forgiveness is misunderstood and underused. It is a sacred gift employed by those who recognize that their true safety comes not from worldly manipulation, but from faith in a higher power. There is nothing in this world that cannot be healed by forgiveness.

Give me the strength to extend pure love and release to everyone I meet. I trust You to take care of me as I let go of my fears that would prompt attack. I take refuge in blessing, that I may live in a forgiven world.

I forgive and I am forgiven. My world reflects the beauty of heaven because I love as God loves.

[bluidkiti]

May 9

Step by Step

"It is easy to let up on the spiritual program of action and rest on our laurels. We are headed for trouble if we do ...We are not cured of alcoholism. What we really have is a daily reprieve contingent on the maintenance of our spiritual condition." - Alcoholics Anonymous, Third Edition, 1976, Ch 6, p 85

Today, a cautionary tale against "rest(ing) on our laurels" and that staying sober is a day-to-day reprieve. Just as clear are the words that my reprieve is based on the "maintenance of (my) spiritual condition." "How can I best serve (my Higher Power) - Thy will (not mine) be done," is the cornerstone of our spiritual recovery. Neglect of that cornerstone will predictably erode the humility obtained when seeking and carrying out the will of our higher power and, with a weakened foundation or none at all, relapse is predictable. That we have only a day-to-day reprieve and the warning against "rest(ing) on our laurels" remind us that the number of 24 Hours we accumulate is no guarantee that we will add to it today. But, today, I am concerned not with how many 24 Hours I have been sober but with carrying out His will instead of mine. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M

**************************************************

~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

TRUST

A person who doesn’t trust themselves can never trust others.

~ Anonymous ~

Our Fellowship provides a realistic opportunity to trust again. We learn to accept people for who they are. We do not place expectations on others. We discover our fellow travelers have had experiences similar to our own and that the issues they struggle with are issues we have in common. We learn not to wrap up all our hopes and dreams in another person. We reserve this relationship for our Higher Power.

Our recovery allows us to live in a world where people have flaws, where mistakes are made, where we might be let down and hurt. It is equally true, however, that we can find joy, companionship, and a warm fellowship if we allow ourselves to trust. We no longer demand that the world change so we can trust it.

First I learned to trust the Program. Now I’ve begun to trust myself and others again.

**************************************************

~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

God as the ultimate mystery of being is beyond thinking.

~ Joseph Campbell ~

The child’s profound question “Where did I come from?” never really gets answered as long as we live. We learn to settle for things that point to an answer, for bits of evidence of partial answers. Holy scriptures tell us what inspired and wise people said over the millennia. But in the end, our thinking isn’t big enough to encompass or understand the ultimate mystery.

Yet it seems to be in the nature of our human race to think in spiritual terms and to embrace mystery. We are in awe when we see the vastness of the ocean, when we gaze across the vista from a mountainside, or when we look through a microscope at the inner workings of a cell. This feeling of awe and beauty, and the mystery it evokes, is the spiritual impulse. The mystery brought us here, and when we follow it, we can learn to trust it. It gives us our birthright to be here and it will care for us.

Today I am in the care of God, and I will accept the comfort of trusting God.

**************************************************

~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Control is an illusion. It doesn’t work.

~ Melody Beattie ~

We’ve probably spent years trying to control the actions and the opinions of others. With powerful determination, we harp, we nag, we get angry and spiteful. Seldom do we succeed in getting our way.

Perhaps there are times when controlling others is appropriate. For instance, keeping our children safe is necessary. But we can’t keep people from harm if they decide to take certain actions. The best we can hope for is that our suggestions help them control their impulses.

While controlling others is an illusion, controlling ourselves is not. We can and should be adamant about taking full responsibility for our every action, thought, dream, and plan. Our willingness to let others live their own lives will influence them in positive ways. That’s almost as good as control!

I will acknowledge how limited my power to control is. Today I’ll focus on my actions only.

**************************************************

~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I need to use my support network

I sit at home, watch TV, and eat. I can’t concentrate enough to read. And I can’t stop thinking. At night sometimes, I’m too agitated to sleep. When I wake up, I feel exhausted. I have little energy.

Those are the longest days and longest nights. And yet I know I don’t have to be alone or cope all by myself. If I work up the courage, I can go to a recovery meeting, talk with a friend on the phone, walk with a friend, or get hold of my sponsor or councillor. I know that when I spend time with others in recovery, it’s easier to spend time with myself.

Today I will contact two support people, one during the day and one in the evening.

*************************************************

~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

You don’t live in a world all alone.
Your brothers are here, too....

~ Albert Schweitzer ~

Some days, we may be too shy to reach out to people. We’re not alone. Others may be shy, too. Often, we can get the help we need by offering it to another. When we can overcome our shyness enough to offer support to someone else, we feel better about ourselves and the world. Soon, we’ll find it easier to reach out to people, to begin a conversation or ask for help ourselves. Those efforts succeed far more often than they fail. We don’t have to let shyness keep us from people.

We discover that giving blesses the giver as much as the receiver. Our Higher Power always sees to it that we get what we need. All we need is to be open to that strength, and to the fact that God’s plan for us includes our sharing with others.

Today help me reach out to others and share of myself.

**************************************************

~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

Attention is a tacit and continual compliment.

~ Anne-Sophie Swetchine ~

When soldiers are ordered to attention, they stand erect and completely still. Their eyes are focused ahead. They are silent. Their attention is completely centered on their leader so they can respond without hesitation to the commands they receive. When you listen to another, your focus needs to be like that of a soldier at attention. Your mind must be free from the clutter of your own thoughts so you can give full attentiveness to the words of another.

There may be times when you are thinking about other things or formulating your response—interfering with your ability to truly listen to others. Or there may be times when your own burdens are all you can handle. To listen to another is an effort you may not be able to make.

But do this often, and you may miss out on the opportunity for human connection to ease your loneliness or isolation. You may lose learning from another’s experience, which may be useful in your own life. And you may miss out on nuggets of wisdom that can ease some of the burdens you are carrying.

Today I will put aside my own thoughts and truly listen to the words of another. I will give my undivided attention so I can gain a different perspective and outlook.

**************************************************

~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

How many times have we heard, "Why? I've given him the shirt off my back and now look what he has done to me," or "I've given him the best years of my life and look what I get in return." If we bestow a gift or favor and expect a return for it, it is not o gift but a trade.

~ Anonymous ~

It’s not easy to give to another with no thought of return. In the past we may have given to takers who drained us of money, food, and time. We may have felt we were supposed to give and give some more.

Then in the program we learned we could receive and didn't have to give all the time. We may have then become overly conscious of giving. We may have been so adamant about not being taken advantage of that we became afraid to give.

Through our growth in the program, we may find it easier to see the difference between a taker and a true friend. In so doing, we'll find we don't need to measure our giving. It will come back to us from those who are truly worth giving to.

I can give to the people I know won't hurt me or take advantage of me. I can trust them.

**************************************************

~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Knowing our limitations

If someone asks us for spiritual information or guidance, we must be sure we have spiritual information or guidance before trying to give it away. It’s an error to assume that just because we are clean and sober anything we suggest will be correct. There is no shame in saying, “I don’t know,” or suggesting another source of help. In fact, it’s a sign of humility.

It takes great courage to recognize and admit our limitations. When we ask for guidance in helping others, we might listen for that “still small voice within” to tell us whether to move forward or hold back.

Am I learning my limitations?

Higher Power, help me to be of real service to you and your children.

Today I will seek spiritual guidance in helping others by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

**************************************************

~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Falling in love with your doctor or nurse or a fellow patient is an old romantic story.

~ LIVING SOBER ~

Newcomer

A friend tells me that she’s been experiencing feelings of attraction toward her sponsor. I’ve heard that this happens, even though most sponsors and sponsees follow the suggestion not to work together if a potential for attraction exists. What should be done about it?

Sponsor

I’m glad that you trust me—and yourself—enough to discuss this sensitive issue.

In most sponsor-sponsee relationships, both participants share a lot about themselves and let themselves be seen as they really are. The mutual respect and caring that can result is a blessing. However, in such a close relationship, feelings, thoughts, and wishes occasionally come up in the form of an attraction. In my own role as a sponsor, I’ve learned that certain intense feelings a sponsee may express, whether of attraction or anger, don’t necessarily belong to me. This sort of emotional transference is common in therapy and other relationships in which the work is close and exposing.

Often, romantic feelings on the part of a sponsee pass quickly. Sometimes all that’s needed is to share them. In my own opinion, it’s good to give the problem some time— if it were to persist as a concern for either the sponsor or the sponsee, they’d want to reconsider the advisability of working together.

Today, I am grateful for boundaries, others’ and my own, that make the fellowship a safe place.

**************************************************

~ THE EYE OPENER ~

God has done some mighty fine work with what the world thought was very indifferent material. St. Paul and St. Augustine were two examples of men that God chose that no personal officer in the world today would have given the OK. AA is full of similar examples where God has chosen the godless and made him His instrument for the performance of good work.

The tremendous energy, zeal, initiative, enthusiasm, and ambition that were factors in our becoming alcoholics, now diverted to better use, make us well qualified to serve in God’s cause.

**************************************************

~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

WHEN SEEKING GOD

If a person would find God, let that person humbly ask for a chance to believe; and meanwhile let him or her go personally, not by delegate, to a less fortunate brother, helping him in his need of body and soul.

When a person seeks God, he or she will presently find what is sought. For when a person can leave him−or herself and enter the lives of others, that person leaves his or her own heart open so that God may enter and dwell within.

*************************************************

~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

PRAYER DOES CHANGE THINGS

Prayer does change things. Let us be perfectly clear about this. Prayer does change things. Many people say that prayer is a good thing because it gives us courage and fortitude for meeting our troubles. They say that prayer often gets a man out of difficulty simply by giving him self-confidence that he would otherwise have lacked. Of course, this is not spiritual Truth. The fact is that seeing the Presence of God where the trouble seems to be does not merely give us courage to meet the trouble; it changes the trouble into harmony.

Prayer heals the body by changing the tissues, and it does this by first changing the mind that forms them. Prayer brings man his salvation by changing his nature fundamentally; not by making the best of him as he is. The body, the environment, the universe itself, is plastic to our thought; and it always reflects our sincere belief.

For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he (Proverb 23:7)

**************************************************

~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Truth and Greatness

If any man seeks for greatness, let him forget greatness and ask for truth, and he will find both.

~ Horace Mann ~

Years ago, I taught yoga in a local adult school. I enjoyed it so much that I decided I wanted to make it my profession. I launched a massive promotion campaign, calling and writing every health spa and adult school in the phone book. After great efforts, I manifested two contracts, one which was eventually canceled due to low enrollment, and the other in a health spa. Our class was located on the floor next to the exercisers who walked over the relaxing yogis and joked about us en route. I began to wonder if a publicity blitz was really the way to go. In the wake of my fruitless efforts, I decided to simply focus on the classes I was already teaching and give them 100 percent of what I had to give. As a result, word-of-mouth spread, and before long I had more invitations that I could accept.

Many of us have the cart before the horse when it comes to establishing a career. We believe that if our presentation is slick enough, we can wedge our foot in the doors we desire. But do you really want to be where you are valued for presentation alone? We earn our right place by giving quality service. Treat your customers like God, and God will provide for you like the heir to the kingdom that you are. Put aside your desire for fame, power, riches, and worldly success, and make it your first priority to give true caring to your clients. Deep in every customer's heart is the knowledge and appreciation of integrity. Quality is the best promotion.

Help me serve through being what I truly am. I put aside my illusions of grandeur and trust that if I am grand in love, I shall live in abundance and joy.

I give my best to life, and life gives its best to me.

[bluidkiti]

May 10

Step by Step

"Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs." - Step Five

Today, my obligation to the Fifth Step is admitting the "nature of (my) wrongs" to three participants - God, myself and another person. Laboring with judicious honesty in the Fourth is not sufficient to reconcile myself with my character defects: " ...If we skip this vital (Fifth) step, we may not overcome drinking." The function of Step Five is to attain humility:"Trying to avoid this humbling experience, (we) have turned to easier methods." And, as we in recovery have been warned repeatedly, there is no "easier, softer way." Today, I will avoid the falsehood of thinking I have lost egoism and attained humility in my Fourth Step inventory, even if it is as honest as it can be, and submit to the humility of sharing the nature of my wrongs to another person - after admitting them first to my higher power and myself. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M.

**************************************************

~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

TOUCHING HANDS

If only all hands that reach could touch.

~ Mary A. Loberg ~

When we were using, we may have been surrounded by people, but we felt alone. When we were beaten down to the pits of despair, we reached for helping hands. We found many extended to touch ours.

We can never stand so tall as when we stoop to reach the searching hand or those who may need our help. We know the hands we touch will give us still more strength to work our Program and carry our message of love.

Now we, too, are willing to reach out to help others who are still suffering, whether they’re in the Program or not. We want to give them the “hand up” we got from our friends and sponsor.

Unless my hands touch others, my recovery program will not survive. This union of hands is one of the secrets of its success.

**************************************************

~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

One of the oldest human needs is having someone wonder where you are when you don’t come home at night.

~ Margaret Mead ~

Many of us grew up with a loving mother who gave us life and cared for our needs. Others among us had mothers who were missing from our lives, either physically or emotionally. Perhaps no word in any language carries more weight or more feelings than the word mother. It carries images of comfort, undying love, first intimacy, and complete acceptance. Few mothers ever totally fulfill those images.

As we become adults, we have a more realistic understanding of our relationship with our mother. She was a real human being, not a stereotype, and not perfect. We longed for her approval and her love, as all children do. We had angry feelings toward her sometimes, and guilt about the ways we hurt her. It is our adult task to make peace with her, living or dead, to forgive her for what we did not get and for how we were hurt, and to accept forgiveness for our mistakes. Only after we have made that peace are we truly emancipated adults and free to love others fully.

Today I seek peace with my mother.

**************************************************

~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Life is for enjoying. It is not a race to see how much you can get done.

~ Jill Clark ~

Before we quit using alcohol and other drugs, we wasted precious hours, days, maybe years. Consequently, we feel we must make up for lost time. We make promises and commitments we don’t have the time or the energy to fulfill. This is a normal response to hindsight. After all, we missed many wonderful opportunities when our focus was on getting and staying high.

Making up for the past is different from making the most of each twenty-four hours. It’s not how much we accomplish in life but how we treat others along the way that counts. We can accomplish our daily tasks while being kind to other people. But choosing the latter as the more important action will bring a far greater sense of well-being than succeeding at “moving mountains.”

I will get done everything I really need to do today if I focus on being kind to the women and men who cross my path.

**************************************************

~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I am coming alive in recovery

When I awaken these days, I feel stronger, hopeful, willing. I have a sense of purpose these days−to recover from my dual disorder, to reclaim my life−and I know what I need to do.

I have come out from under the rock. I feel free and light. With my recovery plan to guide me, my days are full and I sleep well at night. I feel grateful to my higher power for this new strength and spirit.

I will quietly share my process and my joy with my sponsor and group.

*************************************************

~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Where there is patience and humility, there is neither anger nor vexation.

~ St. Francis of Assisi ~

When we begin recovery, we often start tap-ping our feet and looking at our watches, impatient and annoyed because our family and loved ones haven’t caught up with our progress. But if we really care about them, we’ll give them the respect they deserve and let them choose their own recovery timetable, as we chose ours.

We began recovery when we were ready, and not a minute sooner. We may have resisted the urging of others for a long time before we actually felt ready to change our lives.

Now it’s our turn to give others the time they need to change, to let them recover on their own timetable. We’re tempted to rush them, and maybe overeager to share the joys of recovery, our new values. We’ve found a wonderful new way to live, and we can’t wait for them to join us. But wait we must. Our Higher Power can help us wait lovingly and with patience, and we can let go.

Today help me be patient with those who are new to the path of recovery.

**************************************************

~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

My mother wasn’t what the world would call a good woman. She never said she was.

~ Boxcar Bertha ~

Chances are you did not grow up in a home with a mother who was a Carol Brady June Cleaver, or Claire Huxtable. If you did, you were blessed with love, attention, and care. Your mother was there for you. She made you feel important and noticed, and helped you build your confidence and self-esteem.

But if your mother was an addict herself, abusive, or an enabler to your father’s addiction, you lost out on knowing what it felt like to be mothered. If you lost your mother due to divorce or death, such circumstances similarly deprived you of an experience of growth through her guidance. Losing out on the opportunity to build a long-term relationship with your mother is a loss that may never go away.

But no matter what the relationship was or is with your mother, she is still your mother. Have you used the time since you left your childhood home to better understand your relationship with her? Have you been able to let go of what you did not get and accept that you can find love and support in adulthood? Or are you still looking for the mothering you never received?

Today I will forgive my mother and let go of any resentment I might still be feeling toward her.

**************************************************

~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Ozone and friendship will be our stimulants−let the drugs, tobacco, and strong drink go forever. Natural joy brings no headaches or heartaches.

~ Elbert Hubbard ~

The longer we say in the program, working on bettering ourselves, the more addictions we'll find we've outgrown. The alcoholic and the drug addict learn life can be grand without chemicals. The overeater acquires an appetite for fresh air and companionship rather than food.

When we learn to see our lives without a primary addiction, we can then rid ourselves of secondary addictions like smoking, obsessive exercising, caffeine, and sweets. We can free ourselves from all addictions and have a more serene outlook on the healing power we have over our lives.

However, we need to remember we can be obsessive about change. We don t have to become a natural-food freak or a lecturer on the evils of white sugar or nicotine. But we do need to look at the hold those addictions have on us. When we're ready to let go of an addiction, we'll let go of it freely.

I can look at the addictions in my life and make some changes. I can begin tonight by working on le letting go.

**************************************************

~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Relating to our Higher Power

The relation of our souls to God is so pure that it is vain to think that we can separate it from any of our being. God speaks to all of our life. There isn’t one part that belongs to our Higher Power and other parts that belong to a job, family, friends, interests, and soon.

Our relationship with our Higher Power is sacred, and so all of our life is sacred. God loves beyond all things. God’s love and purity enter into all our life. We need but recognize and live by this.

How do I relate to God?

Higher Power, I know that you see me, hear me, and know all my thoughts and desires, even the innermost secrets of my heart!

Today I will work on my relationship with my Higher Power by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

**************************************************

~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

I’ll agree to be your sponsor—if you’ll agree to phone me every day and to call first if you think you’re going to pick up.

~ MAN IN RECOVERY ~

Newcomer

I know I haven’t called you for a while. You don’t have to worry about me, though. I appreciate what you’ve done for me, but I just don’t think I need to call you every single day. I’ve been able to stay away from my addictive substance without always talking about it.

Sponsor

No one can force you to do anything. Your life is your own. You are the one who’s responsible for it. I can share my experiences and listen to yours, but I can’t get another person drunk and I can’t keep another person sober.

When I let others know what’s really going on with me, I start feeling connected with them. That’s not always comfortable. But I don’t much like the work of attempting to control my disease in isolation, either. Consistent sharing with other recovering people is the core of recovery. It teaches us how to be honest.

I want to acknowledge your courage in saying no to me today. I trust that you’ll say it a lot as you establish boundaries that let you feel safe with me and others. But if I’m going to sponsor you in your recovery, I need us to have an agreement about regular times to talk about the program and what’s going on in your relationship to it. And I want to know that if you’re tempted to act out your addiction, you’ll call me first.

Today, as relationships with people continue, I have the courage to identify my own needs. I set appropriate limits that allow me to stay connected with others and to keep my commitments.

**************************************************

~ THE EYE OPENER ~

The life of any individual is a wonderful book; it is a love story; one of adventure and travel. It is biography and it is poetry. It is spiritual and it is tragic. It is everything rolled into one, for it is life, and life is every human emotion and experience.

The story does not end until the last line of the last chapter is completed. God is the author and He records a true portrayal of the character of the actors in the story, and the book will end “happy-ever-after” only if we, the actors, live our roles as He directed.

**************************************************

~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

ONE DAY AT A TIME

One day at a time−this is enough.
Do not look back and grieve over the past, for it is gone.
And do not be troubled about the future, for it has not yet come.
Live in the present, and make it so beautiful that it will be worth remembering.

*************************************************

~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

INCONSISTENCIES MADE CLEAR

Those who are perplexed by the difficulties and seeing inconsistencies of life should remember that at the present time we get only a partial view of things; and that a partial view of anything never shows the thing as it really is. If you were to show an Eskimo any number of pictures of sections of a horse, but never a picture of the whole horse, he would never know what the animal really looked like.

So it is with life. Some day (when we have enough spiritual growth) we will come to see that the seemingly disjointed happenings, the apparent accidents, are really part of an orderly pattern.

Judge not according to the appearance, but judge righteous judgement (John 7:24)

**************************************************

~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

God’s Payroll

Seek ye first the Kingdom of Heaven, and all else shall be added unto you.

~ Jesus Christ ~

I feel so guilty,” my friend Don told me. "I have a word-of-mouth auto sales business in which I sell a few cars a week and make pretty good money. I spend most of my time as a sponsor for people in 12-step recovery programs. Yet I work just a few hours a week, and all my needs are met.”

“No need to feel guilty, Don,” I told him. “You are on God’s payroll.”

The universe will pay you to do what serves it best. To be in your right place and enjoy the benefits of right livelihood, release the idea that work is something you must slave at. The notion that work is a necessary evil and that we must violate ourselves to receive money is not a principle of God, but a tenet of fear. If God is love, then God would not make you do something you hated in order to receive support. To the contrary, the universe will rush to take care of you when you follow your bliss and do what you most enjoy.

You came to earth with talents, intuitions, and visions. As you follow them, you draw to yourself all the material and spiritual support you need. If abundance does not seem to be flowing your way, ask yourself if there is something that you would love to be doing more than what you are doing. Have you had urges or intuitions that you have not acted on? Your secret dreams or delights may be exactly the keys to shifting your energy and results. When you do what you love, you will be serving others in the highest capacity, feel fulfilled, and enjoy the support of the universe.

Give me the courage to follow my heart. Help me do what You would have me do, that I might enjoy the fullness of Your blessings.

I do what I love, and the universe loves to support me for it.

[bluidkiti]

May 11

Step by Step

" ...(D)eep down in every man, woman and child is the fundamental idea of God. It may be obscured by calamity, by pomp, by worship of other things but, in some form or other, it is there. For faith in a Power greater than ourselves, and miraculous demonstrations of that power in human lives, are facts as old as man himself." - Alcoholics Anonymous, Third Edition, 1976, Ch 4, p 55.

Today, the "fundamental idea of God" exists. But the idea may be more deeply rooted in the agnostic and atheist. To those who grapple with the concept of a higher power, perhaps a first step is to acknowledge the one thing that is stronger than all of us - alcohol. In it, we have more than belief in its power: we have experience. And if we can know that something stronger than ourselves can take us to the gates of Hell, can we not take a leap of blind faith in something capable of guiding us back to sanity? But even this challenge is prefaced on a single condition: we must be willing to consider that a higher power exists. Today, I can take that leap of faith knowing that if something so strong as alcohol can kick me in the gutter, there may be something stronger to lift me out of it. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M.

**************************************************

~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

BEAUTY

Beauty as we feel it is something indescribable; what it is or what it means can never be said.

~ George Santayana ~

Beauty is among our most useful and most used words as we progress toward spiritual goals. The kind of beauty that guides our thinking in recovery does not lie on the outside, but rises from within. When we learn to see that beauty in the words, actions, and attitudes of others as well as in the principles we follow, we are choosing well.

Our friends have beauty because of who they really are, not what they may appear to be. The emotions we feel and the living guides we follow are beautiful simply because we need them.

I will have no trouble finding spiritual beauty in our Program. True beauty never dies. It is found in all thoughts, attitudes and emotions, if only I seek it.

**************************************************

~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

It is only by risking ourselves from one hour to another that we live at all.

~ William James ~

We all know men who seem to be empty bodies, walking through life. These are the guys who never talk about anything personal and never let anyone get to know them. Many of them love to complain about their job, their wife or girlfriend, their boss, the government, or anything outside themselves. These guys will talk about sports or the weather but never about real events or personal experiences. Many of us have been these men.

When we wake up to a real life, we become present; we are alive to our experiences, our sensations, and our feelings. This requires that we drop the shield of deadness and become personal. It involves risk and makes life incredibly interesting.

Today I will take the risk to be present to my life in every minute, every hour.

**************************************************

~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Once conflict has arisen, we are kidding our-selves if we think it can he ignored.

~ Linda Riebel ~

Conflict is ordinary, some may even say necessary. And it generally makes us tense, but that’s primarily because we want to “win” every disagreement. Through our role models in this program, we learn that feelings should not be stuffed or ignored, but they don’t have to be resolved immediately either. Simply sharing with someone that we are angry about a situation is often enough. Doing more often escalates a minor conflict into a major confrontation.

Choosing to be peaceful, rather than right, isn’t copping out, even though it may seem so at first. Rather, it’s opting to put our energies into positive exchanges with others. Remembering that every relationship is given to us by design, not accident, gives us reason to pause before stepping on the toes of our “teachers.” Honoring them with love and acceptance diminishes our need to be right.

Letting go of my need to be right today will truly give me peace.

**************************************************

~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I want to talk about my problem

I suspected I had some problems with my emotions and my drinking. But I was too confused and ashamed to talk with anyone about them. And yet I wanted to. It was frightening to feel out of control, to mistrust everyone. I didn’t want to feel alone. I wanted someone to know what was happening with me.

With the help of some “luck,” what I now call my higher power, a trusting friend told me about his recovery in AA. I am deeply grateful for his introduction to this fellowship. I now see that there are others like me, others who can help me simply by their example, by listening to me, and by accepting me. This is what I need to continue coming out of isolation.

I will check in with my sponsor today and allow time for a fellow member who might need my support.

*************************************************

~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Real love is like holding an egg in your hand.
The tighter you squeeze, the more you lose.

~ Ron P. ~

When we learn to love the beauty and gifts of others as separate from us, healthy relationships can flourish. Control is the enemy of love, and at the heart of our painful relationships is usually one person trying to change another.

When we let it, love grows into a flower of unsurpassed beauty. When we trust enough to allow our loved ones to really be themselves and make their own decisions, we open the door to intimacy. Nothing is more loving than feeling free to live without criticism from our partner.

Learning to love someone better challenges us. It isn’t easy, and we run up against our deepest fears of rejection, inadequacy, and loss of control. But these are things we don’t want to bring to a relationship anyway.

The work we do to improve our own health is the most important task in our lives. Part of this work is to let others do the same for themselves. When we can begin to do this, we are beginning to be ready to reap the rewards of real love.

Today help me let go of others, especially those I love.

**************************************************

~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

Rage cannot be hidden, it can only be disassembled.

~ James Baldwin ~

In her book The Tao of Inner Peace, Diane Dreher tells about a time when she was working as a medical receptionist. One day the office was particularly busy and workers were installing new carpeting. During their lunch hour, the workers forgot to unplug an iron and it burned into the floorboards. Dreher rushed to the smell of smoke and quickly unplugged the iron. When the doctors returned from lunch and smelled the smoke, they erupted in anger. Long after Dreher had unplugged the iron and averted an even worse disaster, others were operating as if a great disaster was in progress.

Anger is one of those emotions that can spark quickly. It is not always a bad emotion to express, particularly when it provides warning of possible danger or sets personal limits and boundaries. But anger that lasts for minutes, hours, days, or even years after the source of the anger has passed is unhealthy.

Anger that does not have an on-off switch or that festers over time can easily distract you from taking an appropriate course of action. It absorbs valuable time in the present that can eat away at your growth. And it can spill over into other emotions, which can increase your stress level.

I take steps to release my anger before it escalates or does more harm than good.

**************************************************

~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

A mother's heart is the child's school room.

~ Henry Ward Beecher ~

We've learned much from our mother. That doesn’t mean all our learning has been good or wise, just as it has not been all bad or crazy. Where we are right now in our lives is a result of the things we have learned thus far.

Mothers aren't perfect. Our mother had a mother who taught her. What our mother did was cope as best as she could with what she was taught. We probably received the best she had to offer, even if it may not have been the best in our eyes.

As we look back to our school days, we need to keep in mind that we haven't retained all the information we were taught. We've kept the most interesting and beneficial textbook learning so we could make our way in the world. The learning we received from our mother can be treated in the same manner. Tonight, we can recall what we like and leave the rest. The most beneficial learning she gave us could be as simple as knowing how to tie our shoes or bake bread, or is all-encompassing as our ability to believe in ourselves.

Tonight, I can thank my mother for the good things I learned from her.

**************************************************

~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Overcoming Indecision

We often find it difficult to make simple decisions in our everyday lives. Sometimes the major decisions are easier to make than minor ones. But it is good practice to ask for help on any issue we need help with, major or minor, simple or complex.

Over time our Higher Power will help us see life situations with increasing clarity. Over time everyday decisions will become easier to make and everyday irritations will stop paralyzing our thinking.

Am I conquering my indecision?

Higher Power, I pray for greater self-awareness and the willingness to ask for help with everyday indecision.

Today I will ask for help with

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

**************************************************

~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Honesty is the best policy.

~ DAVID TUVILL ~

Newcomer

I’ve heard people talk about “firing” their sponsors, about sponsors “firing” their sponsees. I find that term disillusioning. I thought we were here to help one another.

Sponsor

Human relationships change, for all sorts of reasons, and there’s nothing wrong with acknowledging that reality. Sponsors, like sponsees, are just people in recovery, growing and working the Steps; we don’t always handle things perfectly. One sponsor may take on more than he or she is really prepared to handle; with phone calls coming day and night from an overload of sponsees, frequency or quality of communication may be inadequate. Another sponsor may enjoy being bossy and have trouble recognizing the difference between passing on program experience and trying to impose his or her will in areas where personal choice is appropriate. A sponsor may discover that a sponsee lacks the desire for recovery or has significant problems in an area in which the sponsor has no experience.

When differences are resolved by talking and listening, relationships grow and deepen. Are we avoiding necessary confrontation with ourselves or others? Or does growth, this time, mean that it’s appropriate to separate? Honesty, courage, and love are qualities that help us make transitions in our relationships.

Today, my willingness to grow enhances my relationships with others.

**************************************************

~ THE EYE OPENER ~

God will only help those who honestly try to help themselves. We in AA know the truth of this statement for it was only when we, by a definite act on our part, determined to do something about our drinking that God made available that Power that enables us to recover our sanity.

If your house is on fire it is very well to pray but the prayers will avail little unless you are running for a hose while you are praying.

**************************************************

~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

RISK

To laugh is to risk appearing the fool.
To weep is to risk being call sentimental.
To reach out to another is to risk involvement.
To expose feelings is to risk your true self.
To place your ideas and dreams before the crowd is to risk being called naïve.
To love is to risk not being loved in return.
To live is to risk dying.
To hope is to risk despair.
To try is to risk failure.
But risks must be taken,
Because the greatest risk in life is to risk nothing.
The people who risk nothing do nothing.
Have nothing, are nothing, and become nothing.
They may avoid suffering and sorrow,
But they simply cannot learn to feel.
And change, and grow, and love, and live.
Chained by their servitude, they are slaves,
They have forfeited their freedom.
Only the people who risk are truly free.

*************************************************

~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

AN ADVANCED CLASS

Many people would like to attend what they call an advanced class in metaphysics; but what could an advanced course include that would not be in the ordinary lessons?

The usual metaphysical classes teach that God is the only power, and that evil is unsubstantial; that we form our own destiny by our thoughts and our beliefs; that conditions do not mater when we pray; that time and space and matter are human illusions; that there is a solution to every problem; the man is the child of God, and God is perfect good; that Jesus Christ is the one who taught the full truth about God, and actually demonstrated it.

Once the student has obtained a correct intellectual comprehension of these facts, and digested them−at least partially−the only thing that remains for him is to develop his understanding by demonstrating them in practice.

So we see that the real advanced course is the one we give ourselves by demonstrating over the practical problems of everyday life.

Faith without works is dead (James 2:20)

**************************************************

~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

A Bit of Myself

Know then that the world exists for you... Adam called his house heaven and earth; Caesar called his house Rome; you perhaps call yours a cobbler’s trade, a hundred acres of ploughed land, or a scholar’s garret, let line for line and point for point your dominion is as great as theirs... Build therefore your own world.

~ Ralph Waldo Emerson ~

“I prefer doing oil paintings,” John told me, “but occasionally I take a commercial art job. Even in my commercial work, I imbue my essence. My brother-in-law, a contractor, commissioned me to do a painting of his backhoe. I depicted the backhoe realistically, and where the backhoe was digging into the ground, I painted a scene of the starry cosmos. He loved it!” Everything we do has our flavor in it. To do anything without your essence would be as impossible as the sun shining without heat. Your essence is the unique dimension you add to any act you express, from walking your dog to building a skyscraper. It is the special energy that you came to deliver to the world. Just as no two snowflakes or fingerprints are alike, every individual has a uniquely beautiful contribution to offer.

When I walked into a bookstore after I published The Dragon Doesn’t Live Here Anymore, I was shocked to find hundreds of books with similar themes, some written by famous and gifted authors. Suddenly I felt glad that I hadn’t studied the market before I wrote the book; I would have felt intimidated and doubted there was anything I could add to the field. I might have even quit before I started. But I was blissfully naive, and I went ahead, motivated by the sheer joy of expressing myself. Now my books are on the very shelves I would have shied away from.

Never shrink from expressing yourself. Your perspective is the one that will carry you. Follow your unique instincts, and you will be uniquely successful.

Help me know that what I am is good enough. I honor the uniqueness in which You created me.

Confident in my gifts, I shine my own light and bring quality to life through my individuality.

[bluidkiti]

May 12

Step by Step

Today, impatience and spontaneous anger will not command what I say because my words may require another amend to someone. Unlike physical injuries, emotional hurt from an unkind word spoken in recklessness or anger may not be as easily reconciled. If today I explode in frustration, God grant me the wisdom to respond first with the discipline and tolerance that are contained within the 12 Steps. More than eating tomorrow the reckless words I speak today, no words can be taken back - and some can cause hurt for which an apology cannot un-hurt. Today, discipline and patience with tolerance and wisdom to guide my words. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M.

**************************************************

~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

VALUES

By accepting God’s help we learn to think clearly, to play fairly, and to give generously.

~ Anonymous ~

Our values change in recovery as we become less and less selfish. The value screen through which we see life is changed. We no longer ask what everyone can do for us; we ask what we can do for them. We no longer seek out situations that only comfort us; we discover ways to comfort. We find that we feel better about ourselves when we help others. We learn from our Program that what we have been searching for our whole lives is wrapped up in service to others.

The valuable relationship is the one that creates a closer contact with our Higher Power, so we seek out situations and people that bring us into closer contact.

The values we show in the work of recovery look different from the ones we once held. Every day brings a new chance to become a conductor of life.

My values no longer change with each passing fancy. My life is beginning to mean something and to count for things that are good.

**************************************************

~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Just as we took refuge in being special, we can learn to take refuge in being ordinary, not being in charge, not being the center of the universe.

~ Wayne Muller ~

In our addictive and codependent minds, we were prone to feeling special. We felt grandiose about our power to fix others, or about our power to walk on the edge of danger and not get hurt. We thought we could handle things that most people couldn’t. Some of us felt especially bad and shameful, more shameful than everyone else. We thought recovery was fine for others but it wasn’t wb.at we needed, or it wasn’t going to work for us.

True self-esteem is not based on feeling special or better than others. A large ingredient of true self-esteem is self-respecting humility. We are all much more alike than we are different, and we are connected to each other on the basic levels of life and death, pain and joy, and the need to give and receive love. When we make friends with other men and really let them know us, we feel our common humanity and a strong sense of self-acceptance and self-esteem.

Today I will notice my connection with all others, the people I like and the ones I dislike, the people I know and the people who are strangers.

**************************************************

~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

I want to be loved, and for that to happen, I must love others and I must want love for them.

~ Betty MacDonald ~

Feeling loved is so elusive. We savor the feeling when it comes, and we think if we hang on tightly, it won’t leave. But we must give love away if we want to keep feeling it. That is the paradox. It is also a principle we can rely on absolutely.

Feeling generous in spirit toward others gives us a powerful blessing in return. We quickly sense that whatever we feel toward the friends and associates in our lives we feel about ourselves. Carrying love for others in our hearts assures us of feeling loved too. It’s easier to understand once we begin utilizing this principle. What we give away, we get back.

I can influence whether or not I am loved by how I treat others today. What I sow I will reap.

**************************************************

~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I need a guide

In the past my only guide was myself (and my addiction). I did the best I could with what I had, but it wasn’t nearly what I needed to manage a dual disorder. And I was not willing to accept ideas for change that weren’t my own.

Now, after a lengthy journey, I have found a new guide, a source of wisdom and strength much greater than myself. I freely choose this higher power, which includes the Twelve Step program. As difficult as it is to do at times, I am letting go of my old unsuccessful ways of coping and trusting more in my higher power. I have found a better way and I will make it a serious commitment.

I will write down one way in which I have already “let go” in my recovery.

*************************************************

~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

I can know my Higher Power through daily meditation.

~ Lucille S. ~

When we are at a Twelve Step meeting our Higher Power is there also. One way to experience that Power is through members sharing their strength and hope. We know our Higher Power is working in our lives when we hear others tell their story, and we don’t have to feel alone again.

We can ask ourselves, are we trying to find ways to identify with other members or are we still trying to be different? Are we finding fault with our Twelve Step program or are we grateful for the principles we are learning? Do we criticize or judge others at meetings? Or are we at one with our Higher Power and the force of our fellowship?

We can, in recovery, strive continuously to improve ourselves. We can let go of the critical, faultfinding we did in the past and live one day at a time, grateful for our sobriety. By doing this, we are living constructively, growing spiritually, and freeing ourselves from pain. We are open to the presence of our Higher Power, who is always within, and who can help us if we only ask.

Today let me feel God’s presence and power in my life.

**************************************************

~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

I have always wagered against God and I regard the little I have won in this world as simply the outcome of this bet.

~ Andre Breton ~

What kind of relationship did you have with God in the past? Maybe you prayed only when you were down in the dumps or down on your luck. Perhaps your prayers were filled with “I wants” rather than humble requests for guidance. Maybe your conversations with God were filled with anger and resentment over all that was wrong with yourself and your life. Because you received no answers and your life did not get better, you began to doubt that God even existed.

You might view your use and abuse in the past as “good times.” But each time you engaged in your habit was like placing a bet on a roulette wheel; sometimes you experienced a good outcome, but more often than not you lost.

In recovery, there can be no wagering with your Higher Power. You cannot build a connection to God by bargaining. You cannot come to a greater understanding of God’s will if you want your will to have the loudest voice or to come out on top. And you cannot fulfill the purpose of your existence when your sole purpose is to fulfill your needs.

I will silence my desires and needs so that I might better hear what God is telling me.

**************************************************

~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Love is a great thing a good above all others, which alone maketh every burden light. Love is watchful, and whilst sleeping still keeps watch; though fatigued, it is not weary; though pressed, it is not forced.

~Thomas à Kempis ~

Love is not just something we say or write. Love is the face we put on, the clothes we wear, the way we walk and move-our very heart and soul. If we are not made up of love, we will reflect this to others and will feel it within ourselves.

Love isn't just a feeling. Love is a truth filled with forgiveness and kindness; with generosity and honesty. It is the willingness to serve and protect, to cherish and respect, to honor and be strong. We do not have to have feelings of love for everyone we meet, but we do need to love them.

Have we loved those around us today? Have we shown others that we acknowledge their truth and character, in the same way we would want them to acknowledge us? lf we can see love as separate from the feelings of falling in love, we will then begin to understand there is love in all of us. And each of us is special enough to be loved.

Tonight I can see love is everywhere and in everyone.

**************************************************

~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Measuring our success

Success and happiness in working our pro-gram are subjective. They have to be. Personal satisfaction in anything depends on the individual’s perceptions. Members may comment on what makes for success and happiness in the program, but we can only measure it for ourselves. To judge success by another’s standards is being untrue to ourselves.

Some judge success in material terms, some in physical terms. Still others judge success in terms of emotional adjustment or mental and spiritual growth. It’s up to us and our Higher Power, not family, friends, or therapists. We alone measure our success.

How do I measure my success?

Higher Power, grant that all my thoughts, words, actions, and successes today will be directed by you.

Today I will examine my standards for success and happiness by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

**************************************************

~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Joy delights in joy.

~ WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE ~

Newcomer

Our group is having an anniversary party, and I asked someone with a lot of time in the fellowship to go as my date. I really stuck my neck out: I let this person know that I felt attracted. Here’s the answer I got: “I don’t get involved with anyone with fewer than five years of recovery!” I wish I’d kept my mouth shut.

Sponsor

Don’t make yourself wrong for asking for what you wanted. While there are kinder, more gracious ways of saying no, at least this person told the truth and didn’t confuse you about what to expect in the future.

A date to go to a dance or a party can be just a date; it doesn’t have to lead to deep involvement. You have the right to enjoy yourself and to have social companionship. It’s good experience to attend some sober social events in our first year, especially with friends for whom recovery is as high a priority as it is for us.

The first parties I attended in recovery were truly scary to me—I hadn’t had much experience enjoying other people’s company without the “help” of my drug of choice. It may be more relaxing for you to lower the stakes by joining up with two or three recovery friends and attending the party in a group. Or you can sign up to contribute food or music or to help with decorating or cleaning up. Having a job to do is one way to feel part of things.

Today, I am grateful for the word “no.”
I respect my own and others’ honesty in saying it.
I feel joy in my recovery and say yes to celebration.

**************************************************

~ THE EYE OPENER ~

The medical profession is sincere in its efforts to help the alcoholic. Unfortunately, however, the very nature of the ailment defies adequate diagnosis, as the causes cannot be localized or catalogued. Every alcoholic is a sick man, but the underlying cause of his sickness cannot be X-rayed because there is no one underlying cause. It is a progressive disease and the patient himself does not know where the pain really is.

We in AA, however, know our patient as we know ourselves, for drunks are strangely alike fundamentally. We know the symptoms and the effects of the malady for we too have suffered it. We know our medicine for its relief, for we were cured by it ourselves.

Alcoholism may develop from any number of hidden causes. We may be very much un-alike in our behavior when drinking but in the hang-over stage we are as alike as two peas in a pod. We know what to do in a case like that.

**************************************************

~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

THY WILL BE DONE

If we were to chase each particular care, each particular worry, and each particular sorrow, I would have business on hand for the rest of my life; but if I can rise into a higher state of mind, these cease to be annoyances and cares. Ninety-nine parts in a hundred of the cares in life are cured by one single salve, and that is, “Thy will be done.” The moment I can say that, and let go, that moment more than ninety-nine parts in a hundred of my troubles drop away.

*************************************************

~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

LET DOWN YOUR BUCKET

We live in the Presence of God. The Bible says, In him we live, and move, and have our being (Acts 17:28) This limitless Power, which is Intelligence and Love−God−can be contacted at any time by turning to Him in thought, and allowing Him to fill our hearts. Whenever we do this He at once begins to influence our lives for peace and harmony and freedom.

A party of shipwrecked sailors were drifting in an open boat on the Atlantic Ocean. They had no water, and were suffering agonies from thirst. Another small boat came within hailing distance, and when the shipwrecked mariners cried out for water, the newcomers said, “let down your bucket.” This sounded like cruel mockery. But when the advice was repeated several times, one of the sailors dipped the bucket overboard−and drew up clean, fresh, sparkling water!

For several days they had been sailing through fresh water and did not know it. They were out of sight of land, but the estuary of the Amazon, which carries fresh water naby niles out to sea.

Closer is he than breathing; nearer than hands and feet.

~ Tennyson ~

**************************************************

~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Soulmate Knocking

When you are no longer compelled by desire or fear... When you have seen the radiance of eternity in all the forms of time... When you follow your bliss...doors will open where you would not have thought there were doors...and the world will step in and help.

~ Joseph Campbell ~

In one of my seminars, a young girl anxiously posed this question: "I live in California; what if my soulmate is in South Carolina? How am I supposed to find him?” Many of my friends have tried all kinds of techniques to hasten the crucial connection: some of them place and answer personal ads; others join video dating services; some pray and recite affirmations; others make lists of desirable mate traits and read them aloud; some hire matchmakers; and others wear crystals and use flower essence formulas.

My friends John and Susan met in a way that defies methodology. John was a hermit living in the Halawa Valley, a remote jungle reachable only by a long and winding road at the far end of the sleepy Hawaiian island of Molokai. One day, John’s friend William showed up to visit him, accompanied by his traveling companion, Susan. Instantly John and Susan hit it off, fell in love, and before long, wedding bells rang. Eventually they moved to another island and John re-entered society.

The season of the heart was ripe for the couple to meet, and destiny had its way. John could not have been situated more off the beaten path, and Susan was simply on vacation. Geography means nothing to destiny. If two people are meant to find each other for any reason, they will. We don’t have to worry or scheme. Simply be what you are, where you are, and your good will find you.

I pray to release anxious struggle. You know my best interests. I believe in love.

I place my destiny in the hands of God, trusting that my good is manifested through a hand greater than my own.

[bluidkiti]

May 13

Step by Step

" ...The alcoholic at certain times has no effective mental defense against the first drink. ...His defense must come from a Higher Power." - Alcoholics Anonymous, Third Edition, 1976, Ch 3, p 43.

Today, it is foolish at best and suicidal at worst to rely on my own defenses if the temptation for that mythical first drink rises up. My refuge and perhaps only defense is my faith, trust and loyalty to the higher power of my understanding. By His grace, may I internalize for the current 24 Hours my past as a drinking alcoholic to smash the lie of just one drink and reinforce that all my morning after's became progressively worse, never better. Let me remember just as much if not more that drinking, in the end, is a choice, that there are consequences for every choice I make and that I and only I will be responsible to those consequences. The question, then, is if I am willing to be responsible to the consequences of my choice to drink. My history is proof that the cost, for me, is too high. Today, I will not depend on myself to ward off the con of a first drink; instead, I will have faith in my higher power. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M.

**************************************************

~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

COURAGE

God, help me to remember that nothing is going to happen to me today that You and I can’t handle.

~ Anonymous ~

Courage is what makes us do the right thing even when nobody else is doing it. We can find happiness while surrounded by darkness; we can be loving in the middle of hate and envy, and serene when surrounded by chaos, fear, and anger.

The principles of our Program help us face impossible odds. We learn that any act of courage may produce future victory for ourselves and others. The courage which we want takes its strength from faith, not from bravery or physical strength.

Foolish, unthinkable courage, though, can be destructive to us or to others. Sensible courage never fails because it is made up of truth and faith.
Let truth and faith give me courage, so that when fear knocks, no one is there.

**************************************************

~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

You can’t control the wind, but you can adjust your sails.

~ Fortune cookie message ~

Sailing is both peaceful and adventurous. Imagine being on a sailboat, working the sails to use the wind for quiet, controlled movement or for exciting speed as you skim across the water. It’s a skill that improves with experience. You learn to work with the wind and apply it to your advantage. Anyone who tries to sail his boat willfully, contrary to the conditions of the wind, gets nowhere.

A well-lived life also draws on experience, and we continue to learn as long as we live. Our male models told us that masculinity meant conquering our surroundings, and many of us instinctively saw competition and confrontation as a matter of personal honor. We believed that, as men, our self-esteem was tied to subduing any obstacle before us. But those were a boy’s ideas about what a man is like.

As we grow wiser and genuinely stronger, we set our sails to work with the wind. We can neither stop the wind nor make it blow.

Today I will watch the winds in my life and work with them to live better.

**************************************************

~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

The truest measurement of my growth and accomplishments is in remembering where I came from, where I’ve been, and where I’m going.

~ Joan Rohde ~

Our daily routines can be so absorbing that we lose perspective on how we used to live. That’s okay. We need to be present to the moment. However, it benefits us to remember occasionally what our lives used to be like. Never getting too far from the insanity of our past helps us be grateful for the gifts that have become commonplace now.

We’ve grown as the result of recovery. For many of us, very little in our lives looks or feels the same. We have new friends, sober relationships, more self-esteem, and a positive direction.

A true gift of this new life is that we have hope. We know we can do great things. We know we lived through our traumas because we had not yet fulfilled our purpose, our part of God’s destiny. And we know we’ll get the guidance we need to fulfill that destiny if we remain committed to the program’s principles.

I am in a “growing” state of mind. My life is a rich and purposeful play directed by my Higher Power.

**************************************************

~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I am grateful for the Twelve Steps

Long ago I gave up my initial guide to living, the religion of my childhood. But the spiritual crisis of my dual disorder left me desperate, lost. I did not know what to do.

After a period of struggle, I found the Twelve Steps−and I am profoundly grateful. The Steps are spiritual, not religious. They are gentle, forgiving. They make it possible for me to recover. They help me accept myself and others. They help me live the kind of life I want. The Twelve Steps are at work in my life.

Today I will spend ten minutes reading about and thinking about this week’s Step.

*************************************************

~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Passive-aggressive anger gives us ulcers and gives others mixed messages.

~ Ruth McKinnis ~

Our past addictive lives were often based on cover-up and denial of feelings. Some old habits die hard, and unresolved anger may creep back into the best of recovery programs. Unexplained bursts of anger may take us by surprise and make us wonder if we really are getting better. Finding ourselves faced with a string of daily irritations, we are now challenged to look deeper at what is really going on in our lives.

What might we be ignoring and covering up in our day-to-day living? Discovering the cause of passive-aggressive anger is a powerful tool that will let us live assertively with our feelings and then let go of them. We don’t have to let our feelings build. With help from our Higher Power and our Twelve Step program, we can work through the real cause of a problem.

It’s always better for us, and others, if we share our feelings rather than store them up till they burst out. In learning to do the next right thing, we learn to be assertive with our anger, and find real peace of mind.

Today let me learn to assertively share my feelings instead of covering them up.

**************************************************

~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

People need joy quite as much as clothing. Some of them need it far more.

~ Margaret Collier Graham ~

Have you ever met those who seem to emit a glow all around them? They seem to exude a brightness that illuminates even the darkest times. They can find the joy in most anything. When they walk into a room, you can al-most feel the burdens of those around them being lifted. These people are not the life of the party—they are the party! What makes some people have such a lightness of living? How can they always seem to be able to find the silver lining in any dark cloud?

Those who have this inner light have learned how to develop a sense of joy and wonder with the world. They are able to sift through what is important in life and what creates distractions so they can extract what is most beneficial to them and discard what is not.

You can develop a similar lightness within you—one that enables you to experience more joy in your life. You do this by developing the ability to pay greater attention to those things that provide you with the most benefit and positive energy, and less attention on petty arguments, silly conflicts, or meaningless distractions. You can then be joyful by keeping your life light, open, and free.

I will nurture the glow within me.

**************************************************

~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

We live on a moving line between past and future. That line is our lifeline.

~ George A. Buttrick ~

Live in the present is a good slogan for those of us who grew up in an alcoholic family because many of us find it hard to do. Sometimes it feels like everything we do is a result of the way we were brought up, and those memories can come flooding back no matter what we're doing. Our character defects, fears, actions, and defenses were all constructed before adulthood. These influence us in the present.

Because o[ our childhood, we are also future-oriented dreamers. We learned to look forward to times when our worries, fears, and pains would be gone. That always seemed to be tomorrow. Everything would be all right−tomorrow.

The past is behind us and the future lies ahead. We are learning the present isn't as painful, as fearful, or as uncomfortable as the past. We may look to the future for hope, but not to place all our faith into a future moment. The present is not so bad, as long as we remember it will never be repeated and our future will never be an unattainable fantasy.

I can place all my faith, trust, and hope in the present.

**************************************************

~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Being a friend

If we want to be miserable, let’s just think about ourselves. “I’m not getting what I want. That person doesn’t treat me right. I don’t deserve misfortune.” It’s easy to be miserable. But if we want happiness, we need to be a friend to someone.

Let’s all share our experience, strength, and hope. If we want to know God’s love, let us show love. If we want contentment and joy, let us walk and talk with God.

Do I bring happiness to others?

Higher Power, help me to show the love I have.

Today I will be a friend to

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

**************************************************

~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

The art of life is to show your hand.

~ C. V. LUCAS ~

Newcomer

I’ve been thinking about talking to another sponsor. Not to replace you—our relationship is important to me, and I get a lot from it—but in addition to you.

Sponsor

We’re lucky to have such an abundance of sober experience in this fellowship. There are many of us, and we can get to know people with various lengths of time in recovery, different experiences, different styles. Knowing others and having the willingness to let others know us is one of the keys to growing in recovery.

I support your wanting to enlarge your support system by taking on a second sponsor. There may be someone, for example, with whom you want to focus on spiritual matters.

Your expressing your desire for additional sponsorship gives us an opportunity to take a look at our own relation-ship. You may think that I won’t be able to understand a particular issue that’s troubling you. You may be worried about how much you’ve already shared with me—many of us in this fellowship are new to letting others get close, and we may feel anxious about it. Problems with relationships are often at the heart of problems of addiction. Whatever it is, I’m open to hearing about it, and I won’t criticize your feelings or walk away. I’ve been there myself. Thank you for being willing to talk with me about your needs and plans.

Today, I am willing to be honest and open with a trusted person.

**************************************************

~ THE EYE OPENER ~

Life is to a very great extent a matter of choice. It is true we do not choose our parents, our birthdays or the day on which we die but that is about all.

It therefore follows we are largely what we choose to be. We made a very radical change in our lives when we chose not to drink and what further gains we make I life will be, likewise, of our own choosing.

**************************************************

~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

COMES THE DAWN

After a while you learn the subtle difference between holding a hand and chaining a soul. And you learn that love doesn’t mean leaning and company doesn’t mean security. And you begin to learn that kisses aren’t contracts, and presents aren’t promises.

And you begin to accept your defeats with your head up and your eyes open, with the grace of a grown-up, not the grief of a child.

And you learn to build all your roads on today because tomorrow’s ground is too uncertain for plans, and futures have a way of falling down in mid-flight.

After a while you learn that even sunshine burns if you get too much. So you plant your own garden and decorate your own soul, instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers..

And you learn that you really can endure, that you really are strong, and you really do have worth.

And you learn and learn . . . With every goodbye, you learn.

*************************************************

~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

UNLOAD THAT CAMEL

Jesus said, It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God (Mark 10:25)

The smile used by Jesus was a graphic one for his listeners. In those days every important city was surrounded by a wall for defense. There would be a large gate in the wall and this would be closed at sunset and placed under an armed guard. There was usually, however, a low wicket gate known as the needle’s eye, set in the big door. When a laden camel arrived after sunset the only way it could get in was to be unloaded of all merchandise, whereupon it would squirm on its knees through the needle’s eye.

Unload your camel if you want to enter the Kingdom of Heaven. You do this, of course, not by getting rid of conditions in themselves, but by getting rid of your sense of dependency on them. Very often you will find yourself so glad to be without a lot of that merchandise that you will never put it back.

**************************************************

~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

All in the Attitude

Always give them the old fire, even when you feel like a squashed cake of ice.

~ Ethel Merman ~

You are a fantastic rider!” trail guide Frank called to eight-year- old Shanera, who felt awkward and looked self-conscious on her first horseback ride. “You look so beautiful on that horse,” he continued. “I can’t wait to get your picture!” The child lit up. Frank works magic with his riders, constantly bolstering their confidence, affirming their strengths, and lightening awkward moments. Fifteen years ago, he came to Maui with a dream of taking visitors on unique horseback treks through secret jungles and unspoiled mountains. With hard work and a dynamic attitude, his Adventures on Horseback? has attracted a steady stream of appreciative clients who ride to majestic cliffs and then picnic and swim at secluded waterfalls. He is living his dream and helping others to live theirs.

Much of Frank’s success is a result of the caring he brings to all his riders. A trail ride with Frank is not just a jaunt on a horse; it is a journey into self-esteem. While some customers are nervous riding through obscure jungle trails, Frank’s unwavering attention, full presence, and unconditional support have filled his guest log with superlative comments and increasing word-of-mouth business.

You can live your dreams, too—the more unique and outrageous, the better! Your best investment in making them a reality is an attitude of confidence, joy, and true caring. Make your career an exercise in giving love, and you will succeed beyond your secret hopes.

Help me remember that everything I do is an opportunity to share love.

My dreams are God’s dreams for me.

[bluidkiti]

May 14

Step by Step



Today, no more wasting energy on the thought I can't drink by saying I neither need nor want . I don't need, want or have to drink because my program has bestowed in me a fundamental character change that is rooted deeper than merely abstaining from alcohol. That change is that I have been given the strength and courage to look at and correct the reasons I drank. Today, I don't need to regret that I cannot drink now or ever again because AA has taken away the need and desire. But may I not rest on the laurels of sobriety and conscientiously practice Step 10 every day: taking a continuing moral inventory and readily admitting and taking responsibility for my mistakes. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M.

**************************************************

~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

FEAR

F.E.A.R. = Frustration, Ego, Anxiety, and Resentment.

~ Anonymous ~

We don’t want to return to the life we led before recovery, but fear should never be the reason why we don’t. Fear keeps us from being open to the Program. If we’re only in the Program because we’re afraid of the old way of life, we’ll never pay attention and open our souls to learn about the new. We’ll be too busy looking back over our shoulders to make sure the old life isn’t creeping up on us.

We have to want the Program out of a desire for a new life, not out of fear of the old. Positive thinking and behaviour will be in charge if we are to make any character growth. Every fear encourages negative thinking that can destroy us. Guilt and shame come from the past, just like fear. If those feelings are what drive us, we will never grow.

I will make it a practice to take note of my fears. I will take an inventory of each fear until I understand what caused it. Then I will be able to find a way to work through them.

**************************************************

~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

It’s not so much that we’re afraid of change or so in love with the old ways, but it’s that place in between that we fear... It’s Linus when his blanket is in the dryer. There’s nothing to hold on to.

~ Marilyn Ferguson ~

The big change for us is moving beyond our addiction and codependency. Many of us didn’t feel very attached to our addiction, but we didn’t know what to do without it. We didn’t feel “normal” when we weren’t using, and it didn’t seem right to stop taking charge of others’ problems. It was hard to imagine what else to do with our time, and hard to build another way of living.

In many other smaller ways, we are called on to let go of what is familiar and move into what is not yet known. This is an uncomfortable but very creative space. We know our growth was stopped by our old ways. Now, with the courage to tolerate the discomfort, we can leave our less mature selves behind and grow to become better men.

Today I will tolerate feeling awkward and uncomfortable while I keep growing.

**************************************************

~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

You can be anything you want to be if you want it bad enough and are willing to work for it.

~ Mardy Kopischke ~

Being anything we want to be sounds too good to be true. The key, of course, is being willing to work for what we want. Perfectionistic though we may be, it’s still likely that most of us want to excel in every pursuit without the necessary hard work: Playing golf four times should mean no more whiffs. Being on the job nearly every day of the month should mean mastery of the computer. There’s a difference, however, between being perfectionistic and working hard.

Knowing that a hobby, a task, a sport, requires hard work shouldn’t take the fun out of it but often does. We mistakenly think that we have chosen an impossible sport if we fail to demonstrate improvement each time we play. But we can learn how to do a task if we are willing to focus our undivided attention on it. Only then can we understand its subtleties. Only then can we be open to the help our Higher Power has promised.

I will be willing to work hard on every task I face today. With hard work and the willingness to practice, I will improve.

**************************************************

~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I am accepting my dual disorder

Lately I have been feeling sorry for myself and what I’ve had to go through. Addiction and a psychiatric disorder are terrible illnesses to suffer. I feel sad about my losses−why me?−and then I get angry.

But at least I am not harbouring my emotions these days. Instead, I talk about them with my sponsor. When I told her about the pity, she suggested I reread the Promises in the Big Book (pp. 83-84). By accepting her advice, I was gently reminded that despite sorrow and suffering, my life has meaning. I realize that I am becoming a more spiritual person. And through my recovery, I can help others recover, too.

I will pray for steadiness in my dual recovery and carry the message of hope to others who still suffer.

*************************************************

~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Why pick thorns, when you can pick roses

~ P Karin W. ~

We’ve all known unhappy souls who seem to spend their whole lives collecting insults, searching for proof that the world is a terrible place. “What did he mean by that?” they wonder suspiciously. Expecting the worst, that’s usually just what they find.

Bad things happen, but something positive can be found in almost every situation. Sometimes it takes close looking, but it’s there if we’re willing to apply faith, time, and elbow grease.

Life is like a jigsaw puzzle; we see only one little piece at a time. Who knows what wondrous things may come from today’s misfortune? Mold growing in a pan of water turned out to be penicillin. A drug invented for use in dentistry was found to control schizophrenia. And the same rain that ruins our shoes grows our food. Unhappiness, misery, insult, death, and destruction come to us all. But so do goodness, beauty, decency, love, and comfort. We find what we look for.

Today help me be patient with bad news and annoyance. Help me pick the roses instead of the thorns.

**************************************************

~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

If you can’t feed a hundred people, just feed one.

~ Mother Teresa ~

A pebble dropped into a pond reverberates in ways that are hundreds of times bigger than the pebble itself. From the point of entry into the water, ripples emerge and extend outwards. Fish dart in the direction of the sinking pebble in the hope of obtaining a bit of food. A duck feels a small disturbance and turns. And when the pebble lands on the pond’s floor, it displaces tiny grains of sand as it settles in.

All this happens, just from one tiny pebble.

The slogan “Keep it simple” reminds you to avoid complications and over analysis so you can stay focused on your recovery. But it also reminds you of the importance of performing simple acts of kindness for others in the fellowship. Things you might not even think about because they are so small may turn a person’s day for the better. When you allow someone to go through a door before you, offer to pour a cup of coffee for another, or smile at a stranger, you are not saving hundreds of addicts. But perhaps, like the pebble in the pond, your simple action will have profound and positive repercussions in the life of another.

Today I will remember that small, simple actions can make a big difference.

**************************************************

~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

The pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; the optimist, the opportunity in every difficulty.

~ L. P. Jacks ~

How many times have we opted not to do something and listed countless reasons? Perhaps we've rejected a career change or geographic move or promotion. Or maybe we've passed up get-togethers or renewing friendships. What is it that tells us to say no?

Looking back, we may discover we've refused changes in our lives because we'd lose our security. We may have refused friendly offers because they meant sharing ourselves with others. We may find that all we could see were difficulties coming out of change and not any enjoyment.

Yet there are riches in every opportunity that comes our way. Our Higher Power doesn't put anything in our path that won't help us grow and learn. By seeing opportunities only as difficulties, we are stifling our enjoyment, growth, and pleasure. If we learn to see more opportunities as great learning experiences, we may begin to say yes.

There will be opportunities that come my way. Help me learn to say yes to them.

**************************************************

~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Staying clean and sober

We know that any skill deteriorates without practice. Likewise, staying drug-free is a skill we develop through practice. We need to learn what skills we have in working our program.

How do we keep ourselves drug-free? Do we pray? Do we take daily inventory? Do we admit when we’re wrong? Do we work with others? Do we practice the Steps daily? If we’re not doing these things, we’re getting self-satisfied, and being too self-satisfied can weaken our skills. If we lose our skills, we may soon lose our sobriety and cleanness.

Am I working on my recovery skills?

Higher Power, help me develop the skills I need to stay clean and sober today.

Today I will not rest on my laurels; I will work my program again by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

**************************************************

~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

The best elixir is a friend.

~ WILLIAM SOMERVILLE ~

Newcomer

How should I go about asking someone to hear my Fifth Step?

Sponsor

There are no rules about how to make a Fifth Step appointment. Some of us choose to take Step Five with a sponsor, some with a spiritual adviser or a therapist, some with a person we’ve heard share at meetings. People don’t have to be in recovery to have some understanding of how this program works and to be good role models and listeners. More important is that they honor our commitment to recovery and our purpose in taking the Step.

Asking someone to perform this important role in our recovery involves discretion as well as trust. Do others have values and attitudes we respect? Is their relationship to the program a healthy one? As we do when approaching a potential sponsor, we ask, “Do we want what they have?” Are they genuinely willing?

Once we’ve made a choice, we can make a simple, direct request: “I’m ready to take Step Five and want to ask if you’d be willing to hear it.” If we’re turned down, we ask another appropriate person. We can trust our experience with other people.

Today, I trust my perceptions of others. I deserve to reach out to people whose quality of recovery I respect.

**************************************************

~ THE EYE OPENER ~

So many times we have seen the practicing alcoholic helped over a period of months and even years, and each time someone labored over him they were rewarded by failure after failure. Surely the Twelve Stepper had done his very best. It was apparent that this guy just didn’t want it or he was so far down the ladder he couldn’t be helped.

Intelligence or common sense would say, drop him flat, yet there is hardly a group today that does not number among its regulars one or more people of this type. These men owe their present sobriety to the fact their sponsors had more heart than brains.

**************************************************

~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

GOD’S PRESENCE

I met God in the morning
When my day was at its best,
And His presence came like sunrise,
Like a glory in my breast.

All day long this presence lingered,
All day long He stayed with me,
And we sailed in perfect calmness
O’er a very troubled sea.

Other ships were torn and battered,
Other ships were sore distressed;
But the winds that seemed to drive them
Brought me to a peace and rest.

Then I thought of other mornings
With a keen remorse of mind,
When I, too, had loosed the moorings
With this presence left behind.

So I think I’ve found the secret
Learned through many a troubled way;
You must meet God in the morning
If you want Him through the day.

*************************************************

~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

HE USED TO DEMONSTRATE

People often say that when they first came to the knowledge of truth it seemed that miracles happened almost every day. Negative conditions of long standing disappeared. Then, they say, a sort of slump seemed to set in, since which they have never been able to do so well.

Now why should this be the case? The explanation is that what demonstrates is an expansion of consciousness. With an expansion of consciousness our conditions must improve. When people first learn of the omnipresence of God, they experience such an expansion. Then the tendency is to rest upon the first knowledge acquired, and to make their early realization serve over and over again. This will not do. It is only today’s realization that will demonstrate, never yesterday’s or last year’s.

God is not the God of the dead, but of the living (Matthew 22:32)

**************************************************

~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Gas or Brake?

Hast thou attempted greatnesses? Then go on; back-turning slackens resolution.

~ Thomas Herriot ~

A student in Suzanne’s self-hypnosis class complained that after she practiced the method to lose weight, she gained five pounds. "Tell me about your technique,” Suzanne said.

“I sat down, closed my eyes, and went through the induction,” answered the student.

“What suggestions did you use?”

“I said just what we did in class last week: 'My shoulders are getting heavier...my arms are getting heavier...my legs are getting heavier...”'

When we attempt to apply positive thinking and do not get the results we desire, we must look not to principles, which always work, but to our application of the principles. The laws of manifestation are impersonal; the universe will put them to work for or against us, depending on whether we apply them intelligently or erroneously.

We may be praying, treating, or visioning for one result consciously, while affirming the contrary subconsciously. We pray for more abundance and then let our mind go into a tailspin of worry when we see an ominous newspaper headline. We envision a more rewarding relationship and then absorb our mind in trashy talk shows that splash abusive relationships before us life mud. We affirm good health and the get significant mileage out of telling the story of our illness. We insist we want a better future, but then protect ourselves from things that happened in the past. It is no wonder that we lurch in fits and starts when we drive with our foot on the gas and the brake at the same time!

To move ahead, we cannot afford to cancel out our good work by feeding our holy mind thoughts and words to the contrary. Become aware of your subtlest indulgence in thoughts, feelings, and energies that negate the good you are trying to create. Keep coming back to what you want. Your vehicle will really begin to travel when you take your foot off the brake.

I pray to keep my mind and heart on track. Help me to be faithful to my vision.

I affirm the best of my visions and I let all else go.

[bluidkiti]

May 15

Step by Step

Today, no immersing myself so deeply into service or 12th-Step work that I neglect my own basic needs. To put into anything the passion I spent on drinking, I will predictably suffer the same outcome of physical, emotional and spiritual emptiness - and resentment. While we are called by the 12th Step to commit ourselves to service, the quality of that service will be negligible if I have not reserved enough of myself to offer something worth giving. Today, I will guard against becoming too hungry, angry, lonely and tired - HALT - to assure that I can be the best of what the 12th Step asks of us - an effective carrier of the message. Today, I will listen to the message again. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M.

**************************************************

~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

ESCAPING DULLNESS

Men are disturbed not by things but by the views they take of them.

~ Epictetus ~

If everyone in recovery followed the principles of our 12 Step program exactly the same way, sharing would be dull and boring. The Steps are constant, but each of us in recovery work them differently, to whatever degree gives us the most serenity and spiritual growth.

If all of us lived the guiding principles of recovery by habit, mechanically, without thinking, the routine would become uninteresting and tiring. We must not be afraid of adding new ideas that work for us to the tried-and-true manner of thinking we find in our Fellowship. Using our imagination properly will keep recovery continuously fresh and rewarding.

Even “far-out” ideas can be useful to me if they inspire thinking and prevent complacency.

**************************************************

~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

There is no smaller package in the world than that of a person all wrapped up in himself.

~ William Sloane Coffin ~

In self-centeredness, we are trapped within the con-fines of our own skin. It is a self-indulgence that stifles and chokes our emotional development by continuously turning us back into our own limitations, pain, and fears. The grandiose feeling of superiority is not the only way that self-centeredness grabs and holds us; feelings of shame and self-pity can also trap us. To liberate ourselves from these traps, we first get acquainted with them and name the feelings, which gives us some power over them. Next, we get outside ourselves by reaching out to help someone else who is genuinely in need.

When we have a cause or a purpose greater than our own selfish goals, we escape the boundaries of our self. That’s the spiritual move toward participating in the larger whole.

Today I will help someone simply out of generosity, or I will help with a cause that’s greater than myself.

**************************************************

~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

I have always been sort of quiet and kept my thoughts to myself. I have looked to “the Man upstairs” and he has provided the answer.

~ Phyllis Elliott ~

Looking to one’s Higher Power for guidance is a tool we are using with greater ease as we continue our journey in recovery. Many of us came into this program with little or no belief in God. Coming to believe in a caring God, one who will gently guide us through every circumstance, does not happen overnight. Fortunately, God is patient.

Trying to figure out how to live our lives— including what job to take, what person to choose as a mate, what opinions to have—was difficult when we didn’t know we had a Higher Power to turn to. And, as a result, we made many unfortunate decisions. But making decisions today no longer needs to be a problem. For every situation we have the answer we need and it rests with God. In the quiet places in our minds we will discover what our Higher Power thinks is best for us. We can either follow the guidance or ignore it. But it will be there for us.

I will ask God to help me with the easy as well as the hard decisions I face today. Relying on God will make my life much more serene.

**************************************************

~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I need to keep trying

Right now, I don’t much care. I’ve been straight and had slips. I’ve been stable and had setbacks. I’m tired of getting up and falling down. Lately it feels like I’m losing control again. I’m afraid I have a long way to go in my recovery.

And yet now that I know what recovery feels like, I know I want it, and I know how to get there. I know, too, that if I think about past events too much, I may get discouraged and do nothing. It’s hard to accept that recovery is a process−but I want to get back on track. I will not quit trying.

Today I will attend a dual recovery meeting and contact my sponsor (or therapist) for extra support.

*************************************************

~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Iron rusts from, disuse; stagnant water loses its purity, and in cold weather becomes frozen; even so does inaction sap the vigors of the mind.

~ Leonardo Da Vinci ~

Being idle is so easy, sometimes we want to make it a full-time job. Our lives are filled with getting to and from places, with work, with family and friends, with obligations and requirements and rules to remember. When we have spare time, we’re tempted to just sit back and take it easy. But this can be habit-forming, and soon the easy way is the only way we’re willing to go. It’s too cold to go to a meeting. It’s too much work to call our sponsor. We’ve put in a full day; now it’s time to relax and take it easy. The television comes on. It’s too much trouble to read, to think, to change.

This attitude is dangerous for us. In recovery, there’s no standing still. We either go forward or we go backward.

When we become more active, we soon discover we feel more alive, vital, and stronger, more excited about life, happier, and more fulfilled. We look forward to prayer and meditation, eager to commune with our Higher Power and feel His peace. There is so much to know, so much to see, so much to do in the world, and every minute of every day is our chance to be part of it. In time, we find ourselves looking forward to doing all we can do and becoming all we can become.

Today help me take advantage of all that life offers me

**************************************************

~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

The Hares and the Frogs

One day the hares were discussing how they could hardly ever relax because of their fear of other animals.

Just then they felt the earth tremble and saw a herd of wild horses stampeding their way. They scampered about in a panic and soon were trapped near the edge of a lake. They decided they would rather leap into the lake and drown themselves than continue living in a state of perpetual panic. But just as they were about to leap, they startled some frogs that promptly hopped into the water.

The hares scanned the lake and saw that the frogs had disappeared. “Perhaps,” said one hare, “things are not as bad as they seem.”

The moral of the story: There is always someone worse off than you.

There are many others who are facing their own set of difficulties and challenges. To think that you are the only one who has problems, what you are going through is unique, or no one could possibly understand the hardships you face minimizes the needs of others. The program is for the good of all, not for the good of one. Rather than stay locked in your own mind-set and bemoan what you are facing, reach out to others.

I will remember there are others who also require attention, comfort, and care.

**************************************************

~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

We owe to our first journeys the discovery that place is nothing. At home I dream that at Naples, at Rome, I can be intoxicated with beauty and lose my sadness. I pack my trunk, embrace my friends, embark on the sea and at last wake up in Naples, and there beside me is the stern Fact, the sad self, unrelenting, identical fact that I fled from.

~Ralph Waldo Emerson ~

Many times we may not like what we are thinking or feeling or the way we are acting. We may try to run away, hoping a geographical move, or new job, or new set of friends will make being with ourselves more bearable. Yet no matter how we change our environment or lifestyle, those changes will not change us.

We can become more bearable by changing from within. If we don't like the way we think, perhaps we can take one minute tonight and think positive thoughts. If we don't like the way we act, we can begin changing our behaviors. By changing from within, we will deal with the reasons why we want to run from ourselves. We will change the person we are running from.

I can stop running and start looking at myself. How can I make myself more likable to me?

**************************************************

~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Giving it away each day

Talent, heroism, and personal beauty. Although society admires such qualities, they don’t count much when it comes to our all- important Twelfth Step work. This work draws on all our talents and powers, but in ways that are subtle, warm, and personal.

With the help of our Higher Power, we develop the power to soothe, suggest, endure, and love. The Step Twelve encounters that happen every day are more important than the work of the statesman or hero. Our program exists and grows through the giving of Step Twelve.

Do I give it away each day?

Higher Power, help me to see the joy of being loving and self-sacrificing.

Today I will practice giving by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

**************************************************

~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

A certain amount of distrust is wholesome, but not so much of others as of ourselves.

~ MADAME NECKER ~

Newcomer

I’ve always had a hard time asking people for things. Asking someone to hear my Fifth Step seems like placing such a burden on them.

Sponsor

Helping other members of this fellowship to achieve freedom from addiction is part of our primary purpose. Speaking and listening to other human beings whose journey resembles ours is one of the principal ways that we maintain our recovery. Being asked to hear a Fifth Step is usually regarded as a gift, not a burden.

Asking for help is a wonderful exercise in humility. It asks us to give up our idea that we’re responsible for every-thing. It asks us to trust other adults to take care of them-selves, to trust that if hearing the Step isn't feasible for them at this time, they’ll say so. It asks us to give up our idea that we’re unique and not capable of being understood, let alone forgiven, by anyone else. It asks us to let other people be close to us.

Step Five dissolves the sense of separation, both for the person sharing and for the person listening. Chances are that neither will ever forget the experience.

Today, a Power greater than myself is with me in all my exchanges with others.

**************************************************

~ THE EYE OPENER ~

There is such an abundance of religions, sects, creeds and cults, that it is little wonder that many thousands of non-alcoholics have thrown up their hands in disgust and proceeded to ignore them all. The poor confused alcoholic certainly could not be expected to wade through this maze of contradictions.

To them the simplicity of the AA program has been its greatest attraction. Here they have been asked only to seek a God of their understanding and to accept a spirituality based on common sense and universally accepted moral standards.

**************************************************

~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

TIME SOMEBODY TOLD ME

Time somebody told me
That I am lovely, good, and real.
That my beauty could make hearts stand still.

Time somebody told me
That my love is total and so complete,
That my mind is quick and full of wit,
That my loving is just too good to quit.

Time somebody told me
How much a person wants, loves, and needs me,
How much my spirit helps set that person free,
How my eyes shine full of the white light,
How good it feels just to hold me tight.
Time somebody told me.

So I had a talk with myself,
Just me, nobody else,
Cause it was time somebody told me.

*************************************************

~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

GOD IS NOT BECOMING

God is infinite perfection and he is not concerned with our limited ideas about time and space and matter.

For thus saith the high and lofty One that inhabiteth eternity, whose name is Holy; I dwell in the high and holy place, with him also that is of a contrite and humble spirit, to revive the spirit of the humble, and to revive the heart of the contrite ones (Isaiah 57:15).

God is not progressing or improving. What improves is our understanding of Him, and as this happens all our conditions necessarily improve too. There never was a time in your history when God was not all that He is today, and there never can come a time when God will be any more then He is today.

God is continually expressing Himself in new ways−but this is not improvement; it is unfoldment. Your life is simply part of this unfoldment, and that is the only reason for your existing at all. You are the living expression of God now−and to understand this is salvation.

**************************************************

~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

A Better Deal

When one door shuts, another opens. He that would struggle with the world, and bear up in adversity, ought still to resolve not to be discouraged, for resolution is the mother of fortitude, and... very much conducive to our deliverance.

~ Samuel Palmer ~

While searching for an office to rent, I found an attractive space for a reasonable fee. I had a few reservations about the place—it was at a noisy intersection and the rooms were small—but I needed to move in a short time, and the quarters seemed adequate. I told the Realtor I would take it, but when I did not hear from him after a few days, I called to remind him that we had a deadline and we needed to get the lease signed. He assured me that everything was in order, and not to worry. Another week passed and I called again, with the same response. Finally, a few days before the first of the month, I told him we could no longer wait for a confirmation. He sheepishly informed me that the owner did not want to rent to me; he had looked at some of my writings and did not like my philosophy. I felt insulted and outraged. "That sounds like discrimination to me!” I righteously claimed.

The Realtor tried to defend the position, but it was clear there was nothing he could do. My mind raced with anger as I felt I had been deceived and mistreated. Meanwhile, and inner voice said, “No use getting upset; this is all working on your behalf.” While driving home, I decided to take a scenic route, where I saw a storefront with a large "For Rent' sign in the window. The landlady was a lovely woman who had sold tea and held tai chi classes in the space, which was large, beautiful, inexpensive, surrounded by green life, and minutes from my home—in every way superior to the place I had lost. I rented the space, and we have been happy there ever since.

Nothing is withheld or taken away from us unless something better is in store. Remember this, and bitterness will fly away forever.

Help me trust that Your wisdom is operating behind the scenes at ail times.

I have no use for sorrow. God is in charge of my well-being.