Eating Disorders - OA March 2014

[MajestyJo]

Saturday, March 1, 2014

You are reading from the book Food for Thought

Other People's Problems

Sometimes we wear ourselves out trying to solve another person's problem. Is this not perhaps a form of egotism? We feel that somehow we should have all the answers and be able to find a solution to every problem, especially when someone close to us is in trouble.

We may be sympathetic and supportive and helpful, but we cannot play the role of God in another person's life. Even our children must learn from their mistakes, just as we continue to learn from our own. If I trust my Higher Power to lead and direct me, then surely He will also direct my family and friends.

The best thing I can do for anyone else is to maintain my own sanity and sobriety. If I eat over a problem--whether it is mine or yours or ours--then I am less able to deal with it.

There are times when no solution seems forthcoming, when an unfortunate or tragic circumstance must be accepted and lived with in the best manner possible. We may not be able to change the circumstance, but we can be sure that God will give us the strength to deal with it.

Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change.

[MajestyJo]

Sunday, March 2, 2014

You are reading from the book Food for Thought

Changing

As we lose weight, we adjust to a new self. Part of the body we had is disappearing, and this can be frightening. As our physical appearance changes, others may react to us differently. Along with the physical changes come new attitudes and expectations. Though for years we may have wished to be rid of the fat, when it actually begins to go we may fear the change.

What is new and unknown is often frightening. We may have used food and fat to retreat from uncomfortable situations. We may have spent so much time eating that there was little left for anything else. We may have expected all our troubles to vanish with the excess pounds. Now we can no longer hide behind fat or kill time with food, and our troubles may very well still be with us. What do we do?

It takes courage to change, to become a new person. We may decide at age forty to learn to play tennis. That takes lots of courage. New activities, new attitudes, changes in relationships with others--all require courage.

Change is frightening, but it is also an adventure. We are not alone. We have OA. Others have gone through the same changes and can reassure us, one step at a time.

May I not be afraid to change.

Change for me was about making healthy choice, but for the most part, it was a change in attitude.

[MajestyJo]

Monday, March 3, 2014

You are reading from the book Food for Thought

Precision

For the success of our program, many of us have found that it is important to be precise when we weigh and measure our food. It has been our experience that carelessness and sloppiness lead to cheating and bingeing.

An extra spoonful or ounce here and there may not seem important, but it can soon become an extra portion. Then it is easy to think that since we have not followed our plan exactly, we might as well go ahead and really indulge.

There are circumstances when weighing and measuring is impossible; then we estimate as best we can. However, for most of us, most of the time, precise measurements are possible and are a valuable aid in maintaining abstinence. Each time we put back the extra spoonful of carrots and cut away the extra ounce of meat, we are stronger. It is always the first extra bite that is the downfall of the compulsive overeater. If we are careful and precise in our measurements, we will not take it.

Accuracy is honesty.

Make me honest with myself, Lord.

[MajestyJo]

Tuesday, March 4, 2014

You are reading from the book Food for Thought

Doing What Feels Good

Doing anything as long as it feels good is a trap. We like to eat for the sheer sensual pleasure of the experience, and we would like to continue long after our need for nourishment has been met. Once our appetites are out of control, we cannot stop, not even when the pleasure has turned to pain.

Unbridled, uncontrolled sensuality will destroy us. Rational knowledge of when to stop is not enough. We may know with our minds that we should not be eating, but still be unable to stop the action of our bodies. If we are unable to control our sensuality with our minds, then how is it to be done?

OA members testify that there is One who has all power, including the power to enlighten our darkness and prevent our self destruction. Through daily contact with this Higher Power, we develop spiritual strength which will control and direct our physical drives so that they do not control and destroy us.

Take my sensuality, Lord, and control it.

[MajestyJo]

Wednesday, March 5, 2014

You are reading from the book Food for Thought

Old Tapes

In the recesses of our minds, each of us has old tapes stored away which tend to be played over and over again. These tapes may have been recorded so long ago that they have little if anything to do with our present situation.

The tapes, which are recordings of positive thoughts and experiences, can be helpful when replayed. Unfortunately, we each possess many tapes which are negative and self-destructive. They include resentments, fears, and hates. When one of these negative tapes begins to play, we may find ourselves opening the refrigerator or going out to buy food which we should not have. Often the tapes continue to play while we are eating.

Taking an inventory each day makes us increasingly aware of our negative emotions: anger, envy, irrational anxiety. Admitting mistakes and making amends relieves us of the guilt associated with our character defects.

By giving our lives to God and staying in contact with Him, we are able to turn off the negative tapes. We receive new thoughts and positive feelings: hope, faith, love.

I pray that my thoughts and feelings may be purified.

Can just hear them now, if I allow them to play in my head. When I press play, instead of deleting them or fast forward, I heard those words, "Eat what's on your plate, some people are starving in this world, be grateful which made me think more. How many times I drank and ate to someone else's health. It wasn't just the choices that I made, it was the quantity I consumed or didn't consume, because all I could hear and see in the mirror was fat!"

[MajestyJo]

Thursday, March 6, 2014

You are reading from the book Food for Thought

Living Now

When we were eating compulsively, we left the here and now. We escaped into fantasy, and we were often unaware of how much we were eating. By some strange mental quirk, we were able to forget that we should have been burning up our excess fat, not adding more.

God is now. To make contact with Him is to bring ourselves in touch with what is real. When we first came to OA, we may have had doubts, if not downright disbelief, about the reality of God, but concrete experience has convinced most of us that a Higher Power is indeed in control.

In order to be rid of the mental obsession which drives us to the insane behavior of compulsive overeating, we practice being constantly tuned in to our Higher Power. He can restore us to sanity and keep us living in the present. By giving Him our past resentments and future fears, we become free to focus on the here and now. Without resentment and fear, we can see the beauty of the present moment.

Lord, keep me living in the here and now.

[MajestyJo]

Friday, March 7, 2014

You are reading from the book Food for Thought

Accepting Abstinence

Abstinence is not so much something we achieve as it is a gift from our Higher Power. It is given to us constantly, from the time we wake up in the morning through every minute of the day.

If we think of abstinence as something we have to acquire through great effort, we will be afraid that we will fail. We will think of weeks and months and years stretching ahead of us and say, "I'll never make it."

Abstinence is given to us now, each day, and all we need to do is accept it. It is not something we do only in order to lose a certain number of pounds. By abstaining, we will lose the pounds, but when we are at our desired weight we continue to maintain abstinence. Abstinence is our freedom from compulsive overeating and the gift of new life.

Thank you, Lord, for abstinence.

[MajestyJo]

Saturday, March 8, 2014

You are reading from the book Food for Thought

"Normal" Eating

The idea that we will one day be able to eat spontaneously, like normal people, is a delusion. We compulsive overeaters tend to think that once we lose our excess pounds, we can go back to "normal" eating. Not so.

It is our experience that once a compulsive overeater, always a compulsive overeater. There is no way we will ever be able to eat spontaneously without eventually getting into trouble. When we reach our desired weight, we continue to eat three measured meals a day with nothing in between, and we continue to avoid entirely our personal binge foods.

When we accept our permanent need to abstain, when we accept the fact that we can never return to what we thought was normal eating, then we can stop making irrational attempts at experimentation which always fail. By accepting our disease and learning to live with it, we become sane and free. We see that our new eating plan is really very normal. It was the old compulsive overeating habit which was abnormal in the extreme.

Thank you, Lord, for sanity.

As they say, what is normal? A cycle on the washing machine. My attitude often says, "It all comes out in the wash!"

With my Fibromyalgia, sleeping disorder and chronic pain, my meals are not always regular. They have been better lately, but can still end up having breakfast at dinner time.

I have found a lot of it boils down to healthy choices and portion control. Always hesitate to use the word control, because of the saying, which is very true, "If you have to control it, it is already out of control."

Sanity isn't always a word that is applicable in some of my days.

[MajestyJo]

Sunday, March 9, 2014

You are reading from the book Food for Thought

No Ultimate "ah"

When we were overeating, we sought an ultimate experience of satisfaction from food. No matter what kind of food we ate, or how much, we never found that moment of satisfaction, that ultimate "ah." It was always just ahead, in the next bite.

Have we finally realized that the ultimate "ah" which we looked for in food does not exist? No matter what we eat, or how much, it will always elude us. Whatever we are looking for--happiness, success, peace, and fulfillment--it is not to be found in the refrigerator.

We do not promise that working the OA program will bring instant gratification or constant happiness. What we do know is that through the Twelve Steps we are given positive experiences which we did not have before OA. We are happier, more successful, more at peace, and more fulfilled than we ever were before we found this program.

By realizing that food holds no ultimate "ah," we can stop destroying ourselves by chasing a rainbow which does not exist.

May I stop searching for happiness where it is not to be found.

So true, some how we get to thinking it is our due. That 'Ah' feeling we get when our drug of choice hits bottom, is hard to forget. I had to remember, that it kept taking more and more to reach that 'Ah' feeling, and when I did find it, I couldn't stop there, I had to have more.

[MajestyJo]

Monday, March 10, 2014

You are reading from the book Food for Thought

Fellowship

Compulsive overeating is a lonely activity. The more we eat, the more we isolate ourselves from other people and the more alienated and different we feel. We need people, but we do not like ourselves, and we fear that others will reject us.

What a relief to find a group of other people with the same problems and feelings! We are accepted, understood, and loved. We find that we are not so different after all.

The OA fellowship exudes a sense of warmth and support. It is a safe place to put aside masks and express honest feelings. There is healing and strength. Meetings and retreats have given many of us a deeper experience of belonging than we have found anywhere else. We are all accepted as we are and where we are in our personal development.

No one tells us what to do in OA. Through the fellowship, we learn what has worked for others and we find relief from our loneliness.

Bless our fellowship, Lord.

[MajestyJo]

Tuesday, March 11, 2014

You are reading from the book Food for Thought

Sharing

In our fellowship, we share our troubles and we share our joys - our faults as well as our assets. We will be accepted and understood, because we are with people who are like us. We may seem very different on the surface, but underneath we are all amazingly alike.

Someone has said, "I can only know that much of myself which I have had the courage to confide to you." As we reveal ourselves to others, they act as mirrors so that we may see and understand who we are.

All of us have hidden fears and buried guilts. Before we joined OA, we had no place to go with these negative emotions, and so we turned to unnecessary food. Instead of rationally facing our worries and our hurts, we ate. Even when we were happy, we found it easier to eat than to express our joy to someone else.

Sharing our thoughts, feelings, and experiences with other people shows us who we are and helps us to accept ourselves. Those with whom we share also benefit.

Grant me courage and trust so that I may share.

This is why I like discussion meetings. Listening to others share enlightened me. At a speaker meeting, if I didn't like the message I could shut out the messenger, but if I go to a discussion, I can't shut everyone out, and something was bound to sneak into my self-righteous mind. I'm not as bad as they are. I didn't do that, so I don't have a problem, I don't have to change. Comparing the actions instead of identifying the feelings, that is, if I let them come out in the first place.

[MajestyJo]

Wednesday, March 12, 2014

You are reading from the book Food for Thought

Nourishment or Drug?

During our overeating days, many of us used food as an all purpose drug. It was a pep pill when we were depressed and a tranquilizer when we were uptight. We turned especially to refined carbohydrates as uppers and downers. As a result, we spent most of our time either artificially stimulated or lethargic.

When we stop using food as a drug and eat only what our bodies need for proper nourishment, we experience emotions which had been buried by overeating. We feel anxiety, fear, and anger. We also feel joy, enthusiasm, and love. We are alive instead of doped up.

We need to express and share our emotions, and in OA we find people who will help us do that. We no longer have to bury our true feelings with food. As we learn to rely on our Higher Power for support in the little things that come up as well as the big things, then we are able to face the day without a drug.

By abstaining, we learn who we really are and what we really feel.

May I not be afraid to live without a drug.

For me it was about identifying that I was using food as a drug, an escape, and a way to cope with my feelings. The coping meant stuffing them so I didn`t have to feel them or deal with them. I could not recovery, until I looked at ALL aspects of my dis-ease.

[MajestyJo]

Thursday, March 13, 2014

You are reading from the book Food for Thought

No More Diets

OA is not another diet club. Abstinence is not something we go on for a while, until we achieve a desired weight goal, and then go off. We are through with diets. In the past, they may have worked for a time, but sooner or later we became bored with them, quit, and regained the weight we had lost.

OA is a program of recovery. We discover that what we eat is not the most important thing in our lives. Each day we plan what is necessary for the nourishment of our bodies, and then we are free to forget about food and go on with our living.

Instead of following a diet for a certain length of time, we maintain abstinence from compulsive overeating every day of our lives so that we may feel good and function effectively. We work the program, live the Twelve Steps, and enjoy each day as never before. We are recovering.

Thank You for the gift of recovery.

[MajestyJo]

Friday, March 14, 2014
You are reading from the book Food for Thought
Power

Our group is infused with a Power that changes lives, the Power of love and fellowship. So many of us can attest to the daily miracles that God has performed and is performing as we live this program. The changes and miracles may happen slowly, and our spiritual growth may be gradual; nevertheless, the Power is real.

As we become aware of this Power, we see how weak and unnecessary were the false supports we had relied on in the past. We probably sought strength in material possessions, personal achievement, social status. These supports all failed us, and we ate to hide our weakness.

Now that we have experienced the Power of the OA fellowship, we no longer have to rely on false supports. We can grow in the program and in closer contact with the One who creates and sustains us.

May I rely more completely on You.

This was so true for me yesterday, and because I am still not feeling good today, I need to be mindful for what I reach out for. When I am not feeling well, I reach out for comfort food. Some foods may be comfortable, but they aren't healthy.

My hands where shaking so bad yesterday that I had trouble getting the food to my mouth. Food kept dropping off my fork, and I found that old voice saying, "Why bother, give up" yet I persisted and ate my dinner which was healthy as far as the fish was concerned, but the mashed potatoes (an extra spoonful) smothered in butter along with the creamed corn (which turns to sugar) isn't so healthy, especially when you are diabetic like me.

Knowing, but not always doing, needs me to bring my God into the equation.

[MajestyJo]

Saturday, March 15, 2014

You are reading from the book Food for Thought

Keep Planning

Maintaining our abstinence means that we continue to plan our three measured meals each day. To leave them to chance is to invite trouble, since compulsive overeaters do not learn how to eat spontaneously, no matter how long they try.

Planning means that we have the food we need available when we need it. We make decisions about what we will eat when we are rested and strong, not when we are in a rush, overtired, or over hungry.

Preparing meals ahead for busy days, shopping for food after a meal rather than before, remembering to allow time for defrosting - there are many ways to make it easy to follow a food plan. When we are convinced that abstinence is the most important thing in our lives, we are able to find ways to maintain it no matter how difficult the circumstances.

Help me to remember to plan.